Sunflower Seeds
by SpaciousSpace
Summary: Ivan loves his job at the floral shop, but with the new delivery boy living at his house will things change? RusAme. TRIGGER WARNING FOR MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH.
1. Blindsided

**A/N: **This is my first RusAme fanfic, and I'm still trying to get a hang of things, so don't go too hard on me, okay? C: I'm hoping to update this at least once a week, but we'll see how school goes. Thanks for reading!

Ivan stuck another sunflower into the display before stepping back to admire his work. The large, bright flowers went well with the other displays in the front of the floral shop. Ivan cautiously picked the vase up and took it to the front display refrigerator, setting it down next to a dozen of roses, the flowers looking up as though to smile at all the passer-byers. As he began to lock the case back up once more, he heard Francis, his boss, yelling at him to give him an opinion.

Francis had hired Ivan earlier in the year, around March. Now, it was December—a time that hardly anyone wanted flowers—and business was slow. He mostly made flower displays to try to lure people in to buy the bouquets, or gave Francis ideas and opinions.

"Ah, there you are, mon cher. What do you think of this vase?" He had a magazine laying before him on a desk, a few things circled in vibrant red marker. The vase he pointed to was a deep blue, and had what looked like ferns gently carved into the sides. Ivan studied the picture a moment, then nodded slowly. "I think it looks great, Francis. And look at how cheap it is." He tilted his head in appreciation for the cute vase. His boss smiled and patted him on the back. "Oui, I agree. We have a delivery coming in tomorrow, but I wanted to look a bit more for some cute stuff." He smiled at his employee.

"Tomorrow? But tomorrow's Friday. Don't we normally get deliveries on Tuesday?" Ivan's eyebrows raised a little, as though to push his inquiry a bit. "Oui, but we have a bunch of flowers to arrange. Did I forget to tell you about the big party we're selling flowers to?" Francis blinked, putting a finger to his lips as he thought for a moment before dismissing it. "Oh well. Anyways, giant party tomorrow. They're asking us to go, as well, so that we can get 'proper recognition', as he said. It's a black tie, so make sure you've got something passade, cher." Francis expected them to arrange all those flowers in one day? "The same day as the delivery?" Francis nodded, looking at a thoughtful Ivan.

Ivan hadn't been to a large party like that in a long time. In fact, he'd never been to a black tie party. Did he even have a tuxedo? He looked to Francis a moment, debating whether to back out or not. Francis must have noticed his hesitation, and he began to smile. "My my, cher. Don't tell me you're thinking of backing out on your boss, now." His tone was playful, but Ivan couldn't help but wonder if he really could just duck out and not worry about it. "Come now, surely you can scrape a few things together. You're 25, after all. It'll be good for you." Francis tilted his head at Ivan, who scratched the back of his head and looked away. "Francis, you sound like some sort of a therapist, or something."

The statement caused Francis to laugh, turning to face his employee in his swivel chair, crossing his right leg over his left. "Come on. If you don't go, I'll cut the time out of your paycheck." Ivan didn't particularly care about his pay, but Francis was making it pretty obvious that he needed to go. After a moment, Ivan nodded and looked down, muttering. "Fine. I'll go." He hoped it'd be worth it. Francis nodded and chuckled. "Good. Now go home, it's past your shift." Looking over at the clock, Ivan noticed it was actually half an hour after his shift ended.

Ivan set the apron back behind the counter and waved his goodbye to Francis, stepping out into the cold December air. It swirled around him and blew his scarf about his body, tickling the parts of his neck that it moved against. It's times like these where Ivan wished he had a car. He hadn't ever gotten around to buying one. Why would he need one? He had two legs that worked marvelously; however, walking fifteen minutes in the freezing cold to get back to his apartment was a pain, indeed. The sky was grey and the air around him as he passed a bakery smelled of nothing but the snow that fell around him, clinging to his eyelashes and the fibers of his scarf.

Ivan stuck his hands in his pockets, finding a few coins as he finally reached the doors to the complex where he lived. He pulled the key card out of his pocket which had been among the coins and swiped it through the reader. The little LED light blinked red up at him. Sighing, Ivan swiped it again, with the fortune to have it turn green this time. He pulled the door open and headed upstairs to the third floor, using an actual key this time—which had also been in his pocket. He couldn't find it at first due to its similar cold feeling to the coins.

Once in his home, he locked the door behind him, slipping his coat off and putting it on the coat rack next to the door. He looked around a moment, taking in the familiar surroundings once more. He finally willed his feet to move forward once more, heading to his bedroom. He waded through dirty clothes around his closet, having trouble pulling the sliding door open. After a few strong tugs, he got the door open, and off its track. He sighed and laid it on the bed for a moment. It'd be easier to get into the actual closet this way. He reached up into the upper part of his closet, taking a black suitcase and pulling it down to him. He set it down on the ground and took the closet door, putting it back on its tracks.

He turned to the suitcase, unzipping it and looking at the disheveled contents a moment before pulling things out and laying them on the bed. After a few minutes of looking, he finally found the old tuxedo he had. He couldn't remember why he had it, but he'd brought it with him when he moved to America. He held up the old outfit, tilting his head at it as he wondered if it would still fit. He looked about the closet for a dress shirt and a tie. He managed to find a dress shirt, but came up empty handed when it came to the tie part. He shrugged it off, deciding to just get one from the store in the morning before work.

Feeling good about having something to wear to the party the next day, he decided to just go to bed. He crawled between his lush, white sheets, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath after he'd settled himself in, falling into a restful sleep.

-**ooo**-

Ivan walked into the floral shop, setting his bag from the store with his tie in it behind the counter. The store was oddly quiet; Francis usually hummed or whistled when no one was there. He looked around the store, not seeing his boss. He decided to look in the back. Ivan turned around and walked to the back of the store, opening the door and stepping inside. His eyebrows raised in surprise to see Francis asleep at the desk where he had been yesterday when he left. Ivan walked forward to take a closer look at Francis, who seemed to have been writing something when he fell asleep the day before.

Ivan looked at the paper, trying to decipher the cursive writing, but it was impossible. The ink had been smeared by Francis's drool. Ivan chuckled softly, deciding to leave his boss be. He instead turned around once more and walked out into the front of the store again, getting things ready for the day. He got out the vases and ribbon, placing everything on the arranging table, his back turned to the door as he got his supplies out. He smiled, enjoying his job and the quiet time he was getting.

However, that quite time was interrupted as the bell opened with the ringing of the bell that was placed on the wall above the door. Ivan turned to see a gorgeous blond walking through the door, his hair in disarray from the wind and snow, glasses fogging up from the sudden warmth. The man slid the glasses from his face, revealing bright blue, happy eyes. Ivan felt his heart falter a moment before it began its regular beating again; this wasn't the normal delivery man, was it? He walked to meet the blond, eyes looking him over. He wore a puffy black vest, a scarf wrapped around his neck. As Ivan got closer to him he could make out the slight scent of coffee and peppermint. He smiled at the man standing before him. "Hello, how can I help you, sir?" His voice was kind and friendly.

"Ah, I'm here to make a delivery to Mr…" He trailed off and looked at his clipboard. "Bonnie-foy?" For a moment his eyebrows knit together in confusing before returning to their normal position above his glasses. Ivan smiled more at the mispronunciation of Francis's last name. "Mr. Bonnefoy?" The blond nodded. "He is actually busy in the back right now. Is it alright if I just take the delivery this time?" He looked to the new delivery man. "Oh, you're his employee, I assume?" When Ivan nodded, the man held the clipboard out to him, along with a pen. Ivan signed his name and dated the paper, looking up to the smiling face in front of him.

"Sweet. Thanks, man. There's a lot of flowers out there, it'll take a while to get all of them in here." The blond looked back out to the truck. "Let me help, it will make it go faster." Ivan smiled again and walked to the door, opening it for the delivery man. Once they got to the truck, the man opened the back of the delivery truck. As they began taking bunches upon bunches of flowers from the truck, Ivan decided to make some small talk with his working partner.

"So what is your name? You are not the usual delivery man." Ivan snuck a glance at the blond out of the corner of his eye. The blond pulled the flowers from the truck with ease. "I'm Alfred F. Jones. I just got hired. Cool, huh?" Ivan nodded. "Very cool." He continued to take the flowers from the back. They were getting close to done. "How about you, big guy? What's your name?" Ivan snorted at the remark about his height. He was at least five inches taller than Alfred. "I am Ivan. It is nice to meet you, Alfred." With that, they smiled at each other and took the final bunches of flower inside.

They situated everything on the arrangement table somehow, finishing everything up. "Well, it was cool meeting you, Ivan. I'll catchya later, or something, kay?" Alfred picked up the clipboard from the front counter where he had left it when they had gone to the truck. Ivan nodded and waved to Alfred as he left the shop. He slumped back against the counter, dropping his head to look at the ground shaking his head. "What the fuck was that?" Ivan began to mutter to himself. He couldn't figure out what that feeling was that he had felt when the blond had walked in, but it sure had been a strong one.

He was brought back to reality by Francis shaking his shoulder, laughing some. "Eh, mon cher? Hohoho! I saw how you looked at him, Ivan!" He was already going off on some random tangent about—Alfred? How he had looked at Alfred? "What are you talking about, Francis?" Ivan looked at him, receiving a smile back. "Never mind. Let's just get these flowers ready, oui?" Ivan nodded, deciding it was better to just let it go.

-**ooo**-

Ivan raised his arms awkwardly. He'd forgotten how difficult moving in tuxedos was. Nonetheless, he walked from the bathroom of the floral shop to meet Francis, who looked completely comfortable and relaxed in his tux. Ivan sighed, looking to Francis. "Alright, can we go now?" He was anxious about this whole party thing. Francis picked up on his nervous aura and laughed. "Oui. You nervous, or something, mon cher?" Ivan shot him a look and Francis kicked the laughing down to just a mischievous smile. They walked to Francis's car, having already delivered the flowers to the party venue earlier. Ivan opened the door to his boss's sleek black car, sitting on the cold leather seat. Francis got in as well, putting the key in the ignition and driving them to the party.

It only took about ten minutes before they got to the venue, getting out of the car and walking inside. The room was filled with tons of people holding champagne and wine in long-stemmed glasses. Ivan looked about nervously, then tried to look at Francis, who was already gone from his side. Ivan sighed; of course this would happen to him. He spotted a free couch and headed towards it. He knew no one here, and he could tell it was going to be a miserable few hours.

Slumping into the couch, Ivan stretched and looked at his watch. It was only seven, and the party went until eleven. He fished the phone from his pocket, checking his email. He had hundreds from his younger sister Natalya. He sighed and deleted those. He opened an email from Francis from quite a while back that he hadn't seen before. He began to read it, laughing at something Francis had written. "What's so funny?" A familiar voice came from behind him. As he turned a bit to the side, Alfred sat down next to him on the couch, also dressed in his formal attire.

Ivan flushed and blinked. "A-ah, just an email from my boss. Making flower jokes." He laughed weakly, taking in the sight of his acquaintance. Alfred looked wonderful in his tuxedo, and Ivan had to tear his eyes away from his body as Alfred began to talk to him. "I didn't know you were gonna be here! I'm so glad I actually know someone here! These other guys are kinda creepy, huh? How old are you, anyways? I'm 23; obviously younger than all these old sophisticated dudes." Ivan couldn't help but laugh again. Alfred's logic was pretty great, he had to admit. "I am 25." Ivan smiled at Alfred. "Neato! We're about the same age. You play videogames?" Ivan tilted his head at the question. "Videogames? Like… Mario, and stuff?" He wasn't very tech savvy, so he tended to avoid those things. "Yeah!" Alfred was grinning like an idiot. "Uh, no, not really. I mean, I am not too good at them." Alfred shook his head. "Well, there are plenty of things to talk about then. I have to teach you all about video games, dude!" At this point, Ivan knew the rest of the evening wouldn't be as bad as he thought it would be.

**Translations:**

Mon cher – My friend

Passade – Fancy

Oui – Yes


	2. Titanium

**A/N: **Alright, first off, I said one post per week. Today, I wrote to celebrating the passing of some of my exams. xD Also, I completely forgot to mention that there is strong language and some awkward moments between other countries and RusAme (as demonstrated in this chapter). Also, I don't own Hetalia. I should say that too. Ah, there's also some other character shipping in minor amounts. ^_^' Sorry.

"Well, fuck that." Alfred was muttering under his breath and sipping at his seventh glass of champagne; his cheeks were flushed a pretty pink from the alcohol. Their conversation about law school was obviously coming to a close now that they had both decided that it was indeed far too long of a time to be in school. The party was still in full swing around ten, and Alfred and Ivan were still on their couch, talking about everything from music, to work and beyond. Alfred set his glass on the small table in front of them, leaving back to stretch some. The two looked around a moment, the silence somewhat awkward.

"So what do you do in the floral shop?" Alfred rubbed the back of his neck, looking to Ivan. Ivan smiled slightly at his companion, thinking about it a moment. "Well, in months like this one, I often times just kinda organize stuff and make displays. I help Francis out some with his orders. And that's actually about it." He shrugged, reaching up to move his scarf around a bit on his neck, making the ends somewhat equal. "Oh, that's not too bad, then. And hey, on the bright side, you'll see me once a week now!" Ivan snorted, the corners of his lips pulling up to form something of a smile. "Huzzah, I'm saved!" They both laughed at this, shifting a bit in their seats. They were now facing each other on the couch, Alfred sitting cross-legged and Ivan with one leg on the couch, the other hanging off.

A question fumbled its way into Ivan's mind. He cocked his head some, looking to Alfred. "Say, what are you doing at this party? I mean, I'm not even sure what the party's for, but just for curiosity's sake…" He trailed off, looking to Alfred with a curious look. Alfred laughed some, rubbing his neck again and looking out into the crowd of people. "Well, the party's for my father's company. He asked me to come here just to be here, you know? Arthur's weird like that." He sighed softly. "And I assume you're here because you guys provided flowers?" When Ivan nodded Alfred smiled. "Gotcha."

The two continued to talk, their subjects jumping around more until, finally, the party began to wind down. They were in the middle of a great conversation about alcohol when, ironically enough, a drunk Francis wandered over to them. "'Ey, we need to goo, Ivan. We got flow'rs to tend to!" He obviously didn't have a clue what time it was. Ivan sighed, standing and setting the champagne glass down. He was glad that only Vodka really got to him. "Francis, did you hit the wine too hard again?" Ivan put an arm under Francis's armpit and around his back, helping him stand. "Wine? What wine?" Francis's cheesy smile just helped to further prove he'd drank too much. Ivan turned his attention back to Alfred, looking down at him as he zoned out in his own little world. "Alfred, you need a ride? You don't really look fit to drive." Alfred snapped out of his reverie, looking up to Ivan. "Huh? A ride? Well, I have to stay in a hotel tonight. My roommate Kiku is mad at me for going into his room without knocking." He rolled his eyes at this as though he were reliving it in his mind. "But I guess I wouldn't mind a ride, if it's not too much trouble." Alfred smiled to Ivan, who held his hand out to Alfred to help him off the couch. "Nyet, of course not." The blond waved the hand away, standing on his own. He wobbled on his feet a second before regaining his balance. He looked to Ivan, waiting for him to lead the way.

Ivan practically dragged Francis out the door, walking back to the car. As they neared the shiny vehicle it dawned on Ivan that he needed the keys. He vaguely remembered Francis putting his keys in his back pocket. Yes, that's right. When they were walking into the building he had slipped them in his back pocket. Ivan took a deep breath; things were about to get alarmingly awkward alarmingly fast. When they reached the car, Ivan turned to Alfred, looking him straight in the face. "Okay. This sounds very odd, but Francis's keys are in his back pocket. I have to get the keys to drive. I'm not feeling him up, okay?" Ivan blushed slightly at his own words before turning back to Francis and letting his chest rest against the hood of the car.

Alfred blinked, his own face tinted pink from Ivan's words. That wasn't something he'd been expecting. However, he found that he couldn't look away from Ivan's hand as it slid into the back pocket of Francis's trousers, eliciting a grunt from the owner of the pants. "Augh, what are you doing? I thought you liked that blond b-" Ivan clamped his free hand over France's mouth, eyes widening. Ivan was glad it was dark out; his cheeks were bright red. When his hand hit the bottom of the pocket with no luck, Ivan slid his hand out of Francis's pocket, grumbling under his breath. "Francis, where the fuck are your keys?" Ivan looked down at Francis's silhouette. "They're in my front pocket."

Ivan reached his arm around Francis, patting his hip to find the pocket. Alfred blushed even darker, shoving his hands in his pockets. Seeing such a scene made his tongue snake out to lick his bottom lip. He couldn't help but imagine if that were him under Ivan, those hands all over his waist and hips. He couldn't help but watch, it was his orientation, and if you asked him, Ivan was pretty damn attractive.

Alfred didn't even notice when Francis suddenly jerked his hips towards Ivan's hand, pinning Ivan to the hood of the car momentarily. "What the hell, Francis?" Ivan's distressed quip was enough to pull him back to reality once more as Ivan finally found the pocket and grabbed the keys. He took Francis and put him in the back seat, buckling him in and shutting the door. Ivan was a bright red, though no one could see that due to the darkness. Turning to Alfred, who Ivan figured was as freaked out about the whole thing as him, he laughed awkwardly. "Ah, do not pay attention to him. He is always very weird when he gets drunk." Ivan looked away and then spoke as though he were addressing his toes, staring at the tops of his shoes. "You still want a ride?" When Alfred made a little noise that he assumed meant yes, he turned and opened the driver's side door, moving to sit on the cold leather seat once more. He shut the door behind him and buckled himself up, waiting to start the car until Alfred had buckled himself up.

As they drove down the street, the silence in the car loomed over them as though it were an extra person. Ivan bit his lip, staring out the windshield. "Uh, which hotel are you wanting to stay at?" Ivan didn't look over at Alfred, suddenly feeling very small. Alfred was silent a moment before shrugging. "I don't really care, honestly." He tugged at his tux, staring out the window at the dark landscape. Ivan finally stole a glance at Alfred, then returned his gaze to the road. "You can sleep in my appartment, if you want." Ivan tried to think about anything but that, keeping a blush at bay. Francis suddenly started making snide remarks under his breath about the two of them, mixed with tired moans.

Looking back at Francis, Alfred pushed his glasses up his nose, then turned to Ivan. "That's very kind of you, Ivan, but I'd really hate to intrude." Ivan shook his head. "You would not be intruding. Hotels are not fun, so I figured you might be more comfortable somewhere else." Ivan's voice was quiet, trying not to be so timid. Why was he so scared of this? Alfred was his friend, right? Well, they'd only met that day, but they were still friends, right? Alfred looked out the window thoughtfully. "Well, only one night. Then I really ought to make up with Kiku. He's nice, just really touchy when it comes to personal space." Alfred's lips played at something of a grin mixed with a grimace. "Getting it on! Party at Ivan's place!" He dropped his voice to a whisper suddenly. "Ils sont totalement allez l'obtenir sur!" Francis busted up laughing, arms flailing about in a drunken manner. Ivan gripped the steering wheel tighter, turning onto the road Francis lived on. He pulled into the driveway, hastily putting the car in park. He took the keys from the ignition, shoving them harshly in his pocket before getting out, moving to the back to pull Francis from his restraint and picking him up over his shoulder, Francis laughing and flailing all the while.

Ivan unlocked the door then looked around, trying to figure out where the bedroom was. He finally figured it out after a bit of wandering around, and threw Francis on the bed. "Francis, I am borrowing your car, alright? I will give you the keys back tomorrow at work." Francis became serious for a moment. "You'd better get those back to me." Ivan nodded, then waved his goodbye to Francis. "See you tomorrow, then." Ivan made his way back to the front door, locking it behind him as he headed back to the car, opening the front door and hopping inside. "Well, that was interesting." Alfred looked to him, blinking a moment before laughing some. "No kidding. He's really hammered." Ivan pulled out of the driveway. "That is not Francis hammered. When he is hammered he tries to fuck everything." Ivan frowned slightly and Alfred busted up laughing, both blushing a bit.

After they had both gotten over the last comment about Francis, Ivan decided to prepare his guest for the worst. "So, uh, my apartment is really messy. Just, um, you know. I warned you." Alfred snorted. "Please. My room is so crowded I can hardly get to my bed, bro. Don't even worry about it." Ivan grinned a bit, not saying anything. His apartment wasn't that bad. Ivan shrugged the thought off and drove the rest of the way in silence. It wasn't awkward like before, it was comfortable this time.

As they were about five minutes away from their destination, Alfred turned to Ivan, grinning. "Mind if I turn on the radio?" Ivan shrugged. "I do not mind." Alfred did something relatively like a fist-pump, grinning and reaching out to grab the knob, turning the volume up. Francis already had it on a pop station that Alfred liked, so he just turned it up loud enough to sing under and not be heard. "_I'm criticized, but all your bullets ricochet! You shoot me down, but I get up._" Alfred turned to Ivan as the chorus came around, singing dramatically. Ivan recognized the tune; his sister had sent him an email of people dancing to this song.

"_I'm bullet proof, nothing to lose! Fire away, fire away! Ricochet, you take your aim! Fire away, fire away!" _ By now, Alfred was really singing it. Ivan couldn't help but laugh, glancing over to him from time to time to watch him sing. However, the moment was short-lived; they pulled into the driveway of Ivan's complex, parking and shutting the car off. Ivan turned to Alfred who was breathing heavily from all the intense singing. "Not bad, Alfred." Alfred snorted. "Bet you couldn't do better, Ivan!" He laughed whole-heartedly, opening his door and getting out of the car at the same time as Ivan did. Ivan opened the trunk and grabbed his bag of clothed from earlier in the day, then made a motion with his head for Alfred to follow him.

Ivan pulled the keycard from the bag, putting it in the card reader. He swiped it once: no luck. Twice: no luck. A third time brought about the same result. Alfred huffed playfully and took the card from Ivan, swiping it quickly. The LED light flashed a cheerful green at them. Ivan opened the door and looked at Alfred, who just smiled at his bewildered friend. They went up the stairs, Alfred nearly falling backwards a few times only to have Ivan steady him. "Be careful, now." Alfred waved him off each time until they got up to the third floor.

Putting his key in the lock, Ivan twisted it, then opened the door for Alfred, motioning for him to go first. Alfred stepped in cautiously, looking around before whirling around with narrowed eyes at Ivan, who took a few steps back. "You lied. You said your apartment was a mess. It looks fine." Ivan blinked. "Ah, I guess it's not as bad as I remembered it." Alfred scoffed. "You were here earlier today! How do you not remember your own house?" He began to pout and Ivan smiled a bit. "I just am so used to living here, I guess. I'm sorry, Alfred." At the apology, Alfred perked up, patting Ivan's shoulder. "Don't worry about it, man! This place is really cool. Do I get to sleep on the couch? It looks comfy." Ivan was taken aback at Alfred's quick recovery, but soon caught up. "If that is where you want to sleep, sure. You go for it." Ivan watched as Alfred ran to the couch, jumping and landing on the couch, posing. "Sweet! Thanks for letting me stay here."

Ivan nodded, walking to the bathroom to brush his teeth. "You don't have any other clothes, do you?" He listened for a response as he put toothpaste on his brush. After a moment, "Oh, shoot! I don't." Ivan put the brush in his mouth, brushing his teeth as he turned and walked from the bathroom to his bedroom, grabbing some of his smaller clothes for Alfred to wear. Once he had them under his arm, he walked to the living room, handing them to his guest. "Here, these are the smallest things I have." He attempted to speak with his brush in his mouth. Alfred got the general gist and thanked him. "Can I change in the bathroom really fast?" Alfred stood as Ivan nodded, heading towards the bathroom.

Upon entering the bathroom, Alfred looked around. Everything was neatly organized on the counter, the medicine cabinet's mirror was shiny and clear. Slowing down a bit now, he took a deep breath, inhaling the wonderful scent of cinnamon. He shut the door behind him, stripping down while admiring the deep blue walls. He stretched, looking at what he had been given. There was a shirt and a pair of boxers, but no pants. Had he dropped the pants? He probably had. He put the new clothing on, slightly weirded out by the boxers, but put them on none the less. Once he had the clothing on, he opened the door slightly to see if there was any sign of Ivan. Seeing that the coast was clear, Alfred sneaked into the living room where, lo-and-behold, a pair of sweatpants lay on the ground. As he bent down to pick him up, he heard footsteps behind him, a short silence, then what sounded like someone turning around followed by the decrescendo of footsteps.

"Oh god," Alfred thought. "What if Ivan just saw me? Fuck, that's awkward." He quickly stood up and threw on his pants before turning to looking behind him. There was no one there, but Ivan's bedroom door was now halfway closed. "Shit, he probably saw me!" Alfred freaked out a little, then calmed himself down. "It's fine. It's fine. It's totally fine." He kept thinking his mantra to himself as he went to knock on the half-closed door. "Ivan?" His voice was softer than usual, feeling awkward now. Ivan opened the door all the way, the cinnamon smell wafting through the air again. "Sorry about that. I, uh, did not realize you were out there." His cheeks were flushed slightly. Alfred held his hands up, grinning awkwardly. "No, no! Don't even worry about it. It happens, right?" Ivan nodded, shifting his scarf on his neck again. Alfred noticed that Ivan wore a tight black shirt that showed off the muscles that typically were never seen, and a pair of sweatpants. Alfred blushed now, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Here, I'll grab you some blankets. Go ahead and grab a pillow off the bed." Ivan went to the closet, kicking aside the dirty laundry, struggling yet again to open it. He managed to pry it open enough to grasp a few blankets and pull them out. He handed them to Alfred and smiled, the awkwardness that had once hung around the room ebbing away. "Will this be enough?" Alfred nodded. "Yeah, this is perfect. Thanks, Ivan." Alfred snatched a pillow from the bed, tucking it under his arm. "Well, I'll see you in the morning, I guess." Ivan nodded. "Da, see you in the morning. Sleep well." Alfred nodded and walked out to the living room again, shutting off the lights as he went. He tossed the pillow at the top of the bed and unfurled the blankets, tossing them onto the bed as well. He crawled between the blankets, filling himself with the warm smell of cinnamon and drifting off into sleep.

**Translations:**

Nyet – No

Mon cher – My friend

Ils sont totalement allez l'obtenir sur! –They're totally going to get it on!

Da- Yes

The song they were listening to was Titanium by David Guetta. (It was the first thing that came up in my shuffled iTunes songs.)


	3. Dreaming

**A/N:** I'm back once again. C: Today was laid back homework wise. I've nothing better to do than write this fic! So, here we are again, staring at this wonderful page. I still don't own Hetalia, nor do I own any of the music in this chapter. This chapter will have a warning for badly written dancing and music that is probably left best to the night club down the street, as well as a somewhat gruesome accident that isn't in detail. Notice I've changed the description… The story took a different turn than what I'd had in mind! xD

Alfred's eyes slowly fluttered open, the strong smell of coffee drifting through the house, combining itself with that Ivan's wonderful cinnamon scent. He rolled over on the couch, muscles tensing and he stretched, his ears filled with the odd high pitched-static sound that always accompanied stretches in the morning. Alfred rolled over onto his side, facing the back of the couch and nuzzling into it.

The blond laid there for a few minutes more, then kicked the blankets off, looking over at the wall clock. 7:30. His eyes widened significantly as he realized he had half an hour to get to work. Bolting off the couch, Alfred stumbled a moment before finding the small kitchen where Ivan stood, leaning against the counter, a bowl of cereal in front of him.

Ivan heard his guest's clumsy footsteps and grinned a bit before concealing the small smile beneath an indifferent expression. "Good morning, Alfred. Did you sleep well?" Ivan looked over to Alfred, his shirt disheveled and somehow turned ninety degrees, the seam running down the left side of his chest. Ivan couldn't help but laugh at that; it was rather comical. Alfred noticed Ivan's toned down laughing, looking down at his crooked shirt. He tugged at it furiously, straightening it out. "Yeah, I slept fine. Hey, I have to be at work in half an hour." Ivan nodded. "I laid some extra clothes out next to the couch for you. Don't drop anything this time." Alfred's face and ears became a bright red, making Ivan smile more. It was rather cute.

Mumbling under his breath, Alfred walked to the bathroom, keeping an eye on his clothing articles this time, making sure not to drop anything. He shut the door behind him and stripped down once more, looking at himself in the mirror confidently. After shooting himself the drop-dead-gorgeous smile in the mirror, Alfred put the new clothed on. The shirt hung down to the middle of his thighs, the pants a bit too big. He waddled back out to the kitchen, his appearance stealing another laugh from Ivan. "Ah, sorry about that. Just, uh, tuck the shirt in, and you wore a belt to the party, so just use that. Your dress shoes will go fine with that." Alfred, nodded, tucking the large shirt into his pants, then retrieving the belt from beside the couch and pulling that through the loops, hooking it. "Yeah, this'll work fine, actually."

Ivan smiled warmly. "Want a thermos of coffee to take with you? I made more than normal this morning." Alfred nodded, muttering a please as he returned to the couch to gather his belongings and fold the blankets. He set everything neatly on the couch then turned to see Ivan standing near the door with a thermos of coffee in his hand, smiling contently as though he were a cat stretched out before a heater. Alfred looked Ivan over slowly. Today, Ivan wore a striped long-sleeve shirt, the cream and green colors went well with his scarf. The jeans seemed to hit him well; they weren't skinny jeans, but they certainly weren't bellbottoms. They were just right, and suited him well.

Ivan noticed that he was being stared at and shifted awkwardly, cheeks picking up a lightly pink quality. Alfred blinked a few times, then walked to Ivan, slipping his shoes on; they had ten minutes. Ivan grabbed the keys to Francis's car, along with his cellphone, stepping out the door and locking it behind Alfred. They walked down the stairs hurriedly, making it out to the car and slipping inside. Ivan started the car and backed out of the parking spot, heading towards Alfred's work.

"So, you're going to make up with Kiku tonight, da?" Ivan was simply inquiring out of curiosity. "Alfred looked out his window. "Yeah, I guess so. He was real pissed though, so I don't know what'll happen, really. He's supremely bitchy about personal space." He sighed, keeping his eyes focused on the world around them as they traveled through town. The car was silent for a moment, the Ivan looked to Alfred. "Please reach into the glove compartment and grab some paper and a pen." Alfred looked at Ivan a second, then opened the compartment, pulling out some paper. "Will this do?" Ivan looked at it; it appeared Francis wouldn't miss it much. "Da, that's fine. Now, write this down, okay?" Alfred was still very confused. What the hell was he doing?

Ivan recited a number, glancing over at the passenger to ensure the numbers were right. When he finished, he nodded in satisfaction. "Put that in your pocket. Don't lose it." Alfred did as he was asked, shoving the paper in his pocket and the pen back into the glove box. "What is it?" Ivan looked to Alfred, a smile playing on his face. "You cannot figure it out?" Alfred frowned. "Is it a super-secret passcode to something?" Ivan laughed. "Nyet, if anything, you will figure it out." Ivan pulled up to Alfred's work building, parking. "Well, have a pleasant day, Alfred. I'll see you around, most likely." Ivan smiled warmly, Alfred returning the smile, though it had a twinge of confusion to it still. "Yeah, later Ivan."

Looking at the time and noticing he was slightly early, Alfred hopped out of the car and shut the door behind him, waving at Ivan as he walked inside, his hands instinctively moving to rest in his pockets. The hand closed around the piece of paper there, mind wandering back to what the paper could be. He mused with the idea that it actually _was_ a code to a super-secret something, or perhaps it was the coordinates to a treasure chest! He walked down the corridor to the main office, where he received his orders from Ludwig, who was one of his friends. He nearly ran into the office door as he turned, mind consumed with ideas that blossomed into others, and so on and so forth. Alfred pushed the door open and walked inside, looking to Ludwig who was already on the phone. He had his back to Alfred, but his finger curled the cord of the phone, the tone of his voice light and rather playful. Alfred ceased his brilliant list of things the number could be to listen to the conversation.

"Yes, I think I'm free tonight." A pause as the voice on the other end of the line excitedly spoke. Ludwig laughed. "Of course. I'll make sure I'm free, okay?" Ludwig giggled.Actually_ giggled_, not laughed or chuckled. Alfred's eyebrows shot up, he was obviously amused. Ludwig's voice suddenly became very quiet. "Yeah, love you too." There was a moment of silence, then another giggle from Ludwig, followed by a goodbye. He hung the phone up and turned around, jumping backwards at Alfred's presence, a blush spreading rampantly across his features. "How long have you been standing there?" Alfred shrugged. "'Bout a minute or so, man. You sound rather smitten." Alfred smirked, hand still holding the paper in his pocket.

"Smitten? Ah-haha. Where'd you get that idea?" Alfred laughed at his friend's sudden stuttering. "Never mind that, bro. What're my orders today?" Ludwig composed himself enough to dig through a few papers to find his calendar. "Uh… You have a delivery to the bakery on Pike street, and the floral shop on third and the one on Main." Alfred pouted slightly when he said nothing about his new favorite shop, the one on Capital. "Alright, thanks." Ludwig nodded and Alfred turned to head back out, walking further down the hall to the room on the very end. He finally slid his hands out of his pockets, looking around the room.

Packages were being slid about, being sorted by destination. Alfred walked to the manager. "Morning, sir. How long until the deliveries are ready?" The manager looked down at him. "We have the first one ready." He nodded to the corner. "It's over there; you'll need the dolly to get it out, though. All that damn flour and sugar." Alfred smiled slightly, nodding his thanks and grabbing a dolly from beside the door, loading everything onto the cart. He pushed the dolly out the door and down the hall, going out another door that lead to the truck parking area. He loaded everything into the back, then closed the door, walking to the front and getting in the driver's seat and starting the beast up.

-**ooo-**

Ivan dialed Francis's number, still sitting in the parking lot. Francis picked up on the second ring, sounding as though he was trying to lift something heavy, or hold multiple things at once. "Bonjor, mon ami." Ivan decided to get right to the point. "Did you need a ride to work since I've got your car?" There was a crashing noise and an exasperated sigh on the other end. "Aucun, I had a friend drive me to work this morning. Speaking of which, anything fun last night?" Ivan rolled his eyes at Francis's excited tone. "I will see you in five minutes." Ivan hung up, tossing the phone in the passenger seat, staring at it for a moment. He wondered if Alfred would pick up that the number he made him write was his cell phone number. He wanted to be sure Alfred had a place to stay, just in case things went wrong.

Ivan drove to the shop, then locked the car, heading inside. He tossed the keys to Francis, who turned to him with an inquisitive quirk of an eyebrow. "You are not going to let that go, are you?" When Francis nodded he sighed. "No, nothing 'fun' happened last night." He put air quotes around the word "fun". Francis pouted. Ivan went to work cutting the stems of roses, putting them artfully into the vase with a few extra little embellishments. His day seemed as though it would be pretty damn near normal.

-**ooo**-

Alfred's stomach lurched, threatening to launch everything out as he took the sight in. The man walked into the main office, his arm bone sticking out at an angle, threatening to stab its way through the man's skin. The gash on the opposite side of his arm where the bone had bone had broken was terrible. Ludwig kept his calm, as normal. He dialed 911, asking for an ambulance.

"What happened?" Alfred wrapped his arms around himself to keep from losing his lunch. "I was about to go on a delivery and I was walking through the blind spot on Gilbert's truck, and he backed up fast enough to knock me over. Hit right on the corner of the back deck." The guy acted as though nothing had happened.

"Alfred, since your deliveries are completed, will you do his deliveries for him? You'll have to stay later than normal, but these need to be done." Feeling the hero swell up inside of him, Alfred nodded vigorously. "Of course, man!" He turned to the wounded guy. "I got your back, bro!" He gave him a thumbs up, then went to load the packages into the truck. Once that was done, he came back and got the list of destinations from Ludwig. Alfred hesitated in Ludwig's office. "Hey, what do you think this is?" He pulled the number out of his pocket and showed it to his friend, who stared bluntly at it. "Are you serious?" Alfred nodded, causing Ludwig to pinch the bridge of his nose. "It's a phone number." Alfred looked down at it for a moment, then realized he had Ivan's phone number. He jumped once, pumping his fist in the air before leaving the office, leaving Ludwig to wonder what the excitement was about.

Alfred left the building to do his deliveries at five, his mind wracked with excitement. He did his deliveries with extra friendliness and smiles, finishing everything at eight. He drove the truck back and walked to his own apartment. As he approached the building his happiness turned to sour nervousness. He took the key from his pocket, trying the lock. "Funny," he thought, "Kiku must still be mad. He changed the locks again." Alfred shook his head, knocking on the door. After a moment with nothing happening, Alfred raised his fist to know again when the door suddenly opened, Kiku holding a bag of Alfred's clothes and belongings. His angered roommate proceeded to toss everything at Alfred's feet before making an attempt to close the door. Alfred wouldn't take that. He put his forearm against the door, shoving it back with all his might.

"What the fuck, Kiku? I came back to apologize to you, and what do I get? You lock me out of the house, throw my shit at my feet, then try to slam the door in my face! Not cool, man!" Alfred's voice was louder than normal, and Kiku didn't like that. The man let the door go, which swung wide open with Alfred's weight, giving angry Kiku an opening to show Alfred who was boss.

Taking his opportunity, Kiku connected his fist with Alfred's jaw, then his other with his roommate's gut. "Get out, Alfred!" The blows were enough to knock Alfred back past the threshold of the door, giving Kiku the chance to close and lock the door, which he gladly took. Alfred stared at the door incredulously, lips parted with the burn from the punch to his face. He felt tears well up in his eyes, but held them back because hero's didn't cry; at least, in Alfred's mind they didn't. He gathered his things from the ground, finding that Kiku had put all the stuff he really needed in the duffle bag. He shook his head, zipping the bag closed before turning away from the apartment. What was he going to do? He ran a hand through his golden hair, frowning. He was so angry and hurt that Kiku wouldn't even let him apologize to him.

Alfred began to walk, not sure where he was going, just knowing he was going somewhere. The sky was dark, the street lights casting a bleak light onto the sidewalk, almost as though it were tossing Alfred's mood onto the cement for him to stare at as he walked. His mind had one question that kept rotation through over and over and over. _What the fuck?_ He scowled at the ground for a long while before finally looking up. He recognized this area of town. In fact, he'd been here last night. Alfred didn't even bother to check the time, though it might have been wise for him to have done so. He walked to the front door of the complex, then sent a text to the number Ivan had given him that morning. _Hey, can you let me in?_ Alfred felt the cold air seething through his jacket, waiting for something to happen. After a moment, the main door opened, revealing Ivan, his hair gloriously disheveled as though he'd been either lying in bed for a while, or sleeping. Alfred raised a hand in an awkward greeting.

"Alfred, what happened? You okay? Gosh, your poor face…" Ivan reached a hand out to brush his fingers against the swelling on Alfred's cheek. He actually looked genuinely concerned, which was enough to make Alfred's emotions go haywire. His eyes watered over and he began to cry. Ivan was truly alarmed at this, unsure of what to do. He gently took Alfred's arm and pulled him inside, shutting the door behind them. Ivan tilted his head, looking at the crying boy a moment before pulling him into his arms, hugging him cautiously. "Shh, it's alright, Alfred." They stood there like that for a moment until Alfred could get his emotions under control. He took shallow breaths, the smell of the familiar spice found its way to Alfred's nose. He wasn't sure what to do; his best friend hated him for a minor offense and he was kicked out of his own house.

Finally, Alfred stopped crying and wiped his eyes. Ivan smiled at him sympathetically. "Come on upstairs. We will get you settled in and you can tell me about your day, da?" Ivan took Alfred's hand, looking to Alfred's face to see if he was alright with it. Both were blushing lightly, hands gripping the other's. They made it to the third floor, opening Ivan's door and heading inside. Ivan locked the door behind them. "I will go get some ice for your cheek. Have a seat on the couch, okay?" Alfred nodded dumbly, the cinnamon scent enveloping him once more, calming him further. He walked to the couch where he'd previously slept the night before, dropping his bag next to it and sitting down.

Ivan returned with a bag of ice wrapped in a wash cloth. He handed it to Alfred, sitting next to him on the couch. "Do you want to tell me about your day?" Alfred looked at him a moment before nodding curtly. He began at the beginning, adding his feelings and thoughts into everything. When he'd finished, Ivan looked to him, a frown yanking his lips down at the corners. He reached his hand up to brush a strand of hair from Alfred's face. "I see. It sounds like it has been a really traumatic day for you. Would you like to just go to bed? Or we can play a board game, or something of the sort." Neither of them had to work tomorrow, so Ivan didn't care what they did, really.

Alfred shrugged. Ivan looked at Alfred a moment before grinning. "You wanna know a secret about me? You can't tell Francis, alright?" Alfred lightened up a bit at this, nodding. Ivan's grin turned into a smile. "I used to dance a lot. All sorts of dance from ballet to jazz to lyrical, you name it I've done it." Alfred stared at Ivan before laughing some. "No way. I don't believe you." Ivan laughed more. "You don't believe me? How about I prove it to you?" Alfred laughed more, nodding some as he forgot his despair. "Sure thing. Need music? I think Kiku put my iPod in here somewhere. I'll choose the songs so that you don't already know them, or something." Ivan nodded, "Alright then. Give me your best." He stood from the couch, moving the coffee table from the room and adjusting his sweatpants a bit on his hips. He looked at Alfred, waiting.

"I'll give you the name of the song and the artist. If you don't know the song, you can give dancing a go. I'll warn you now, the songs I give you are pretty weird. No hate crime, got it?" Alfred grinned. Ivan nodded, agreeing to this rule. "Alright. Have at it."

Alfred shuffled through his iPod, looking for something sexy. He stopped on a song, looking up at him. "Fever by Adam Lambert." Ivan shook his head. "Nyet." Alfred grinned and pulled the headphones out of the iPod, hitting play and letting the speaker send quiet music out into the room. Ivan listened to it a moment, shaking his head and grinning. He honestly couldn't believe he was doing this again. He started with a simple sway of his hips, adding in arm, shoulder, and leg movements that flowed with the original hip movement, yet were still tight and precise.

Alfred sat on the couch cross legged as he had at the party, watching as Ivan got back into the swing of dancing. He was mesmerized by the movements of Ivan's body, watching how one move flowed into another. Alfred bit the inside of his cheek, a grin playing at his lips. The way he moved was very appealing, but the song soon ended and Ivan ended his dance with a bow. Alfred clapped softly, keeping quiet so as not to wake the neighbors above and below them. "Another! Another!" Alfred smiled at him. Ivan laughed. "One more, and that's it' alright?"

Alfred nodded and picked another song. "If you know this one, don't judge me for having it on my iPod, alright?" Ivan nodded and Alfred blushed a little. "Flesh by Simon Curtis?" He bit his lip, watching as the Russian shook his head once more. Alfred laughed. "This should be interesting, then." Ivan raised his eyebrows. "Care to give me an idea of what the song is about? It'll help me dance better." Alfred, cracked a giant smile. "It's pretty much about sex. And biting." Alfred laughed and Ivan stared at him. "Kink much? And are you really making me dance to this?" Alfred nodded and hit the play button. Ivan shook his head but got the beat none the less. "Don't judge me for my dancing." He began with the hip sway again, though it was different this time. His movements building up to full dancing were far more seductive than before. Alfred watched as though he were in a trance, a corner of his mouth pulled up in a grin.

Ivan tried hard to listen to the words to know what the hell he was to be expecting. Sometimes he'd flip the hair out of his eyes, something Alfred seemed to get a kick out of for some reason. His body moved fluidly, seeming to match the mood of the song well enough. At the end of the song, Alfred turned his iPod off, staring at Ivan with his jaw dropped slightly. Ivan was slightly out of breath, not used to dancing so much. "That song is… What the fuck." Ivan couldn't think of how to describe it, deciding to instead substitute an adjective with a statement. Alfred laughed and nodded slightly.

"So I guess you weren't lying. You're really good." Ivan shrugged. "I have not danced in at least six years." Ivan sat back down on the couch next to Alfred. "Seriously? Dayum boy!" Alfred grinned at Ivan. "You got some moves there." Alfred grinned, yawning some. Ivan smiled and thanked him. "We ought to go to bed now, though. It's rather late, and I think we are both tired." Alfred nodded, pulling the blankets up from next to his duffel bag, as well as the pillow.

Once Alfred was situated, Ivan stooped to gently kiss his forehead, still feeling bad for the boy's rather crap-tastic day. He walked back to his room, shutting off the lights as he went, leaving Alfred to himself. Alfred felt better already, almost as though the smell of cinnamon and the sight of Ivan dancing had completely driven the bad events of the day from his head. He smiled, closing his eyes and turning on his side, facing the couch and nuzzling into his pillow. After a few minutes, Alfred sank into dream land. He dreamed he was watching Ivan dance with another man. Their movements were similar to Ivan's last dance for Alfred. This didn't sit well with Alfred, causing him to awake abruptly. He sighed, looking at the clock finally; it was well past midnight. He sighed and tried his luck at good dreams this time. As he fell into sleep once more, his brain drew him images of hamburgers upon hamburgers.

Ivan, on the other hand, was lying awake in his bed still, unable to find sleep. His mind kept flickering back to the moment when he had hugged Alfred, held the sweet blond in his arms. He felt his cheeks heat, rolling over and sighing. He willed his brain to think of other things. He finally fell asleep, dreaming he was laying in a great meadow of sunflowers he'd planted from seeds, all of them growing to be big and strong.

**Translations:**

Da – Yes

Nyet – No

Bonjour – Good morning

Mon ami – My friend

Aucun – No


	4. Possibility

**A/N: **By now, you must all think I'm a crazy liar, saying I'll only post about once a week. Well, here's the fourth update this week. I neglected to post yesterday due to my mother being… well, my mother. I still have no ownership over Hetalia, and still no ownership of the songs used in this chapter or any brand names. Warning for the chapter: There is still language, and some awkward parts. (I think I'll put a warning at the beginning of all the chapters, just so you know what to expect.) Thanks for reading!

"Come on, Ivan! You should teach me to dance." Alfred was sitting on the couch he'd slept on last night, staring at Ivan, his voice whiney. He tended to be bored on his day off. "Teach you to dance? I have not danced for a long time, Alfred. I cannot teach you to dance." Ivan sat next to him, one leg crossed over the other. His hair was still a disaster, his scarf wrapped lazily around his neck, draping to the floor and brushing the carpet. "Come on! _Pleeeease_?" Ivan rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Nyet. I can teach you other things, but certainly not dancing. Not now, anyways."

Alfred cocked his head to the side. "Other things? Like what? Could you teach me to bake stuff? I mean, you obviously survive somehow." Alfred looked at Ivan intently, not blinking. "Ah, bake what, exactly? I can cook basic meals, but nothing extravagant." Alfred grinned. "Could you teach me to make cookies?" Alfred was not a baker or cook in the slightest. He wanted to learn to make something sweet, though. Having the ability to satisfy his sweet tooth himself was something that sounded very pleasant in his mind. "Cookies? Really?" Ivan paused a moment, looking at Alfred to see if he was bluffing. When he showed no sign of a lie, Ivan exhaled. "Da, I suppose so."

Alfred jumped off the couch and pumped his fist in the air. "Sweet! Literarily." He laughed and jumped up and down excitedly. "Can we start now? Please? I want to do something!" Ivan smiled as he stood. "First, I think we should get cleaned up a bit. Your hair could use a comb through." Ivan ran his hand through Alfred's hair, grinning before ruffling it playfully. Alfred smiled, gently pushing Ivan's hand away. "Hey, you just made it worse, you know." Ivan nodded. "Oh, I know. I did that on purpose, Alfred." Alfred glared at his friend playfully. "Pfft, fine. Ruin my gorgeous looks." Ivan's smile faltered slightly as he attempted not to laugh, trying to keep it serious.

"I am very sorry, Alfred. I did not know you were so gorgeous. But I see it now! Da, I have completely killed it." Alfred mock punched Ivan's shoulder. "See what you've done? Now no one will love me, Ivan! You've set me up to live my life all alone! I'll be the crazy old cat man who lives on the corner and owns like, a million-bajillion cats!" Ivan frowned slightly, trying to put up a good act. "I am so sorry, Alfred! I have ruined everything. How could I ever make it up to you?" Alfred smirked, looking up into Ivan's eyes. "Well, there are a few ways. One involves that couch over there." Alfred jerked his head to the couch, eyes gleaming suggestively. "Ah, are there any other ways?" They both let out a little laugh. "Well, I suppose you could just teach me to make cookies. I guess that'd suffice."

Ivan pretended to wipe the sweat from his brow. "Oh, phew! Thank goodness I can make it up to you." Ivan hugged Alfred as part of their act, but as Alfred wrapped his arms around him to reciprocate the awkward affection, Ivan's heart rate shot up. Ivan inhaled slightly, catching a whiff of light cologne, the smell intoxicating him. Ivan personally preferred not to wear anything of the sort, but he found that it was extremely attractive. Alfred, on the other hand, got a direct smell of his favorite scent ever: cinnamon. Alfred nuzzled into Ivan's chest, taking a wonderfully deep breath, letting his eyes close.

The two stayed like that for a moment, just enjoying the sensation of being hugged by someone. Alfred looked up to Ivan after a bit, smiling. "Cookies?" They stayed in their embrace as they spoke, looking at each other casually as though they weren't hugging in the middle of Ivan's living room. "What kind did you want to make? I might not have the stuff to make it." Alfred thought a moment, resting his head on Ivan's chest. "Hmm. What about white chocolate chip cranberry cookies?" Those were his favorite. "Sure. We'll have to go to the store, though. I don't have that stuff just laying around my house, you know." Alfred shrugged. "That's fine with me. We should go soon, then. I want to get started right away." Despite Alfred's words, neither of them moved for a moment, a comfortable silence falling around them.

Ivan finally pulled back from Alfred a bit, both sets of arms loosening. "Well, let's get ready to go, then. Remember to brush your hair." Ivan smiled as they returned to that, turning around and walking to his room. He pushed the door part-way closed behind him, grabbing a new shirt out of the closet, as well as all the other things he needed to be wearing in order to be in public. Ivan took his scarf off cautiously, folding it and setting it on the bed as he slid his pants off, going through the motions of getting dressed. After his bottom half was dressed, he pulled his shirt off, stretching in the meanwhile. As he reached for his new shirt, a loud thud came from the living room, followed promptly by a string of curses. Ivan forgot the shirt, opening the door and walking quickly out to the living room.

"What happened?" There appeared to be nothing broken, but Alfred was hopping on one foot. "Augh, fuck! Fucking bitch! Why the hell were you even there you fucking dumb ass couch! Ugh!" Alfred wheeled around at the sound of Ivan's voice, ceasing his hopping and instead looking at Ivan, eyes looking over his torso quickly as he attempted to recover. "U-uh, just stubbed my toe. No biggie." Ivan blinked. "You alright?" Alfred nodded, eyes traveling over Ivan's shirtless, muscular chest. Not only was this the first time he'd seen Ivan shirtless, but it was also the first time he'd seen him without his scarf wrapped around his neck. Ivan suddenly became extremely self-conscious, crossing an arm over his body to grab his opposite elbow. "Ah, good." He stood there awkwardly before, turning and walking quickly back to his room, taking his shirt and pulling it on quickly.

Ivan returned to the living room, face flushed pleasantly pink. Alfred noticed and patted Ivan's cheek. "Oh, how cute." He stuck his tongue out at Ivan, smiling some before heading to the bathroom to change. He shut the door behind him, changing as he did every morning. After he'd done that, he looked to the mirror, looking at his hair which had been mused about by Ivan. He grinned a bit, the thought giving him little flutters in his gut for some reason. Alfred turned the faucet on, running his hand under the cold water before running it gently through his hair, not even bothering with the little cowlick that stuck up in the front of his hair. He'd grown to love that annoying, pain-in-the-ass strand of hair. Having done that, Alfred returned to the living room where Ivan was standing, cautiously wrapping the scarf around his neck. It was still pretty damn cold out, though it wasn't snowing and had warmed up significantly from Friday.

Ivan looked to Alfred, then out the window. "Ready to go, then?" Alfred nodded and Ivan grabbed his key, and his card, shoving both in his wallet, and shoving that in his back pocket. He nodded towards the door and opened it, gesturing for Alfred to go first. They walked out, Ivan turning to lock the door and realizing he had to dig his wallet out to get to his key. He sighed; should have seen that one coming. He locked the door and they were on their way. Alfred and Ivan were both were glad that Ivan lived so close to everything. The grocery store was actually only a five minute walk from his place. Alfred dug his phone out of his pocket, looking up a list of ingredients they would need, practically bouncing down the street, half from the cold temperatures, and half from being so excited.

They reached the grocery store and Alfred grabbed a cart. "Hey Ivan! If I sit in here, will you push me?" It was a childish thing, indeed, but today Alfred just felt like being a child. Ivan raised his eyebrows as if to ask if he were serious, then grinned ever so slightly. "Da, I suppose so. Just make sure not to move around too much." Alfred smiled from ear to ear, jumping into the cart quickly and sitting cross legged, looking at Ivan expectantly. Ivan grinned at Alfred, thinking how cute it was that he wanted to sit in the cart. He didn't realize it'd be so damn difficult to steer.

Alfred listed the things off, talking to Ivan about anything and everything as they walked to the area of the store where said item was kept. This continued on for seven items, then Alfred told him that was all they needed from the store; Ivan had the rest at home. Since they were there, however, Ivan decided to grab some more coffee grounds and more bread. As they finished, they walked – or in Alfred's case, rode – to the check stand, putting everything on the conveyer belt. Ivan pulled his wallet out of his back pocket, pulling out a twenty and a five, handing it to the lady. She looked at Alfred with raised eyebrows, but then put the money in the register and gave Ivan his change back. He thanked her, then proceeded to exit the store, making Alfred get out of the cart. They split the bags between themselves, walking home.

"God, it's so cold out today!" Alfred shivered some, teeth chattering. Ivan looked over to him, then transferred all his groceries to one hand, tugging his scarf off and wrapping it around Alfred with the other hand. Alfred blushed, looking down at the scarf ends hanging torpidly off his shoulders. "T-thanks." His voice was quiet, still smiling as they continued down the sidewalk to Ivan's house. Ivan transferred the groceries to one hand, getting his card from his wallet and opening the door on his first try. They walked in, the warmth of the building making Alfred's glasses steam up as they had in the floral shop. They managed to get up the stairs and into Ivan's apartment, closing and locking the door behind him.

Alfred set his groceries down on the kitchen counter, followed by Ivan's groceries. They shed their coats and returned to the door, hanging them on the coat rack. Alfred slowly removed the scarf, looping it back around Ivan's neck. He rubbed his neck, looking at the ground. "Thanks for letting me use that." Ivan smiled and patted Alfred's hair. "Da, of course. It was very chilly out." Ivan rolled up his sleeves, then walked to the kitchen. "Come on, then. We had better get a start on these cookies, Alfred."

Ivan heard a squeal of delight come from behind him and the pattering of sock-clad feet against the hardwood floor behind him. "Yeah! Let's do this!" Alfred mimicked Ivan, rolling his sleeves up. "Oh, wait. We need some music." Alfred returned to the living room, getting his iPod and its dock, plugging them in in the far corner out of their way. He hit shuffle, and suddenly the room was filled with Moves Like Jagger. Alfred loved Maroon 5. Alfred attempted to dance back to Ivan, absolutely failing.

Ivan laughed and pulled the flour out of a pantry above the sink, getting measuring cups from a drawer next to the stove. He preheated the oven to 350, looking to Alfred. "Alright, first thing's first. Preheat your oven so that it's ready to go when the mix is done." Alfred nodded enthusiastically. "Next, make sure you follow directions very closely, alright? " When Alfred gave another nod of understanding, Ivan pulled a bowl out from the same pantry as the flour, setting it on the counter.

"Alright, so when you measure flour, you scoop it into the measuring cup using a spoon. That makes it so that it does not get compacted and you get too much flour." Ivan fiddled with another drawer, pulling a spoon out for Alfred. "Now, open the flour and put two cups into the bowl." Alfred nodded, taking the spoon hesitantly from Ivan. He stabbed the spoon down into the white powder, attempting to pull the spoon up cautiously, but instead flinging flour about the room, polluting the air with floating particles that made both of them sneeze a few times. Ivan looked at an embarrassed Alfred, who was practically coated from waist up with flour. Ivan looked down to see that he had also gotten quite a lot of flour on his clothing, as well.

"Right. Ah, try again, be more careful and do not lift so much at one time, da?" Alfred nodded, becoming determined. He pulled up again, but still had too much. Flour was shot up into the air in Ivan's direction, falling in his hair and all over his shirt. "Ah." Ivan chuckled and took the spoon from Alfred. "Try it like this." Ivan got the spoon filled with flour, then lifted gently, some of the flour avalanching off the side before Ivan moved the spoon to fall over the measuring cup, flour settling at the bottom. "Try it again, Alfred."

Once again, Alfred took the spoon in hand. As he concentrated, his tongue peeked out from the corner of his mouth, becoming coated in flour. Ivan grinned, watching as Alfred finally got the flour filled spoon to rise into the air without disturbing the powder. He cautiously moved it over to the measuring cup and let it fall. As soon as all of it was out of the spoon, Alfred grinned and set the spoon on the counter, putting both fists up in the air is if to declare himself victorious. Ivan chuckled and watched as Alfred did it again and again, then poured the contents of the measuring cup into the mixing bowl.

Ivan patted Alfred on the back, smiling at him. "Great!" Alfred looked at Ivan's face, which was now covered in flour. Alfred grinned and caressed Ivan's cheek, dusting some flour off. "Ah, not really. I really made a mess." They both looked at the ground, seeing their footprints in the white on the ground. Ivan laughed heartily, smiling at Alfred. "It's alright, you managed to get it in the end." They both smiled at the other, Ivan obviously slightly amused and proud, and Alfred just plain ecstatic he was able to pick flour up in a spoon.

"So next, we need to add the milk and olive oil." Ivan went about his kitchen, pulling this from there, setting everything down on the counter next to the flour filled bowl. "So, take this liquid measuring cup," Ivan took it from the cupboard above their heads. "And fill it until it's half a cup full, alright?" Alfred nodded, taking the milk from Ivan. He could definitely do this part, for sure. It was just like pouring milk in cereal, right? He screwed the lid off of the milk, setting it down and pouring the milk into the cup until it hit the mark Ivan had told him to hit. He set the milk down and looked over to Ivan, who nodded some and smiled in approval. "Now, measure the olive oil. We need a third of a cup." Alfred took the tiny white cap off the olive oil, pouring it in and accidentally getting a little over a third of a cup. "That's alright, it doesn't really have to be exact. This will just make the cookies a tiny bit softer." They went through the list of things, mixing them together as they followed the recipe on Alfred's phone. Finally, they had the mixture ready. Ivan took another spoon from the drawer, handing it to Alfred. "Now, the trick to this is to make sure you don't make the balls too big. They'll collide together if you do that, so be really cautious, okay?" Alfred nodded yet again, taking the spoon from Ivan. He smiled sweetly at him, then looked down at the cookie dough.

He stuck the spoon in the dough and tugged up roughly, pulling out a decent sized chunk, which had stalactites on the bottom. Alfred looked at it, then at Ivan. "Is that too big?" When Ivan nodded slightly, he sighed, hitting the spoon against the side of the bowl to make it fall off so that he could start over. He took the spoon and sipped it down into the dough again, pulling up to have a well-rounded teaspoon. "That is perfect, Alfred." Ivan nodded to him, getting out a cookie sheet he'd had laying around since he'd moved in. He got the Pam out from the pantry, lightly spraying the pam onto the pan. He then set it down in front of Alfred. "Alright, so just drop the dough onto here. You can scoop it off with your finger, if you need too." Alfred flicked his wrist slightly, getting the dough to come off with ease.

They continued this process until half the dough was gone and the sheet was full of unbaked cookies. "Now, we need to put them in the oven, then set a timer." Alfred knew how to do that. He opened the oven door, sliding the sheet in, then closed the door, hitting a few buttons on the oven to get it to start a timer. Ivan smiled, somewhat surprised Alfred knew how to do that. "Done!" Alfred smiled at Ivan, then shivered. "It is a little cold in here, da? How about some hot chocolate?" Alfred smiled and nodded. Ivan nodded and smiled, moving to his pantry to get the hot chocolate mix. He put a pot of water on the stove, turning the burner on to boil the water.

Once the water was boiling, Ivan pulled the pot off the boiler and poured water in two mugs. He mixed in the brown powder. Handing one of the mugs to Alfred, Ivan went to the fridge, grabbing the whipped cream from the bottom shelf, bringing it back to Alfred. He put some in his cup, the cream sitting on top of the deliciously warm drink. Alfred held out his cup, watching at Ivan put the whipped cream on top of his drink. He grinned then went to take a sip, the whip cream getting all over his nose. Alfred appeared not to notice, but Ivan saw and grinned. He tapped his first finger against Alfred's nose, taking the cream and sucking it gently off his finger.

Alfred blushed, smiling very slightly as he watched Ivan lick the whipped cream off his finger. He sipped more of his drink, getting more on his nose on purpose to see what Ivan did. Ivan raised his eyebrows and took a sip of his drink, as well. He felt the cream stick to his nose as he pulled back from the cup, licking his lips. Alfred took his turn to laugh softly, taking a step towards Ivan, who shot him a look as if to say, "What are you looking at?" Though, it was a playful glance. Alfred reached out to Ivan at the same time Ivan reached to him, running his thumb over Ivan's nose and licking it as Ivan did.

By that point, both of them were blushing, grinning at each other before taking another sip. "You know, with how much you get on your nose you might as well just put some on there straight from the can." Alfred laughed and took the can from the counter. "Like this?" He quickly squirted some on Ivan nose, who blushed more and laughed, taking the can from him and getting some on Alfred. The two went back and forth, getting each other with the cream and wiping it off themselves, flicking it on the other person with a laugh. Ivan ran to hide behind the pantry, only to be followed by Alfred, who sprayed the back of his neck with the cold whipped cream. Ivan shivered, slowly putting his hands up as if to surrender. They were almost out of whipped cream, anyways. Alfred took a small step forward, placing a hand on Ivan's shoulder before going up on his toes, gently licking the back of Ivan's neck to remove the whipped cream.

Ivan gasped, blushing a pretty shade of pink. One of his surrendering hands was placed on the door of the pantry to stabilize himself. Alfred grinned a bit, stepping back and setting the can on the counter. "Truce?" Ivan blinked and turned to look at Alfred. "Ah, d-da. Truce." He smiled at Alfred, still blushing before going to get them towels.

Once the cookies had come out of the oven and cooled, Alfred decided to try one. He picked it up, frowning a bit as most of the cookie broke off from the piece he was holding. Nonetheless, Alfred took the bite of cookie into his mouth and chewed, getting crumbs on the corner of his mouth. He had to admit, for his first try, this tasted fucking delicious. "Ivan, you gotta try this! It's awesome!" Alfred turned to Ivan and smiled. Ivan nodded, then picked up part of the cookie that had fallen from Alfred's fingers, popping it in his mouth, brushing a thumb casually against the corner of Alfred's mouth to remove the crumbs that were there.

"Not too bad, Alfred. Good job." Alfred smiled from ear to ear, eyes shining. "Really? You think so?" Ivan nodded, ruffling Alfred's hair as he swallowed, flour falling out of his hair. "Vsevyshniy, we are a serious mess. We should go clean up. You can shower first, if you like." Alfred nodded and ran to the living room to grab some clothes before heading to the bathroom, starting the shower.

Ivan stood in the kitchen, looking around before rubbing the back of his neck where Alfred had licked. He shivered, eyes closing for a second. He stayed like that a moment before deciding he should clean the kitchen while Alfred was showering. Listening to the music on Alfred's iPod still, he got the Swiffer mop out of the cupboard in the laundry room, bringing it out to clean the floor. Once he'd done that, he took a Lysol wipe and cleaned the counters. When that was finished as well, he cleared some of the dirty dishes they'd neglected to put in the sink for the remaining cooking time.

He washed the bowls, measuring cups, and spoons, putting them away. Alfred was still in the shower. Looking at the clock and noticing it'd been twenty minutes, he frowned and pulled out some Tupperware from a pantry, hips moving from side to side with the music. He set the box on the counter, scooping the cookies up and placing them into the Tupperware. He then proceeded to put the rest of the cookie dough on the newly cleaned and Pam'd sheet, sticking them in the oven and setting the timer once more. It'd been half an hour by now, and Alfred still wasn't out. Ivan decided he'd go and check on Alfred.

He walked to the bathroom, raising a hand to knock on the door when he heard Alfred singing. Ivan pulled his hand back, pressing his ear to the door to listen. "_Chocolate Rain! Some stay dry and other feel the pain! Chocolate rain! A baby born will die before the sin! Chocolate Rain…_ Uh…" Ivan smiled as Alfred forgot the rest of the words, switching to a new song. "_America, fuck yeah! Coming again to save the mother fucking day now! America, fuck yeah! Freedom is the only way now! America, fuck yeah!"_ Alfred paused, obviously forgetting the words once more. He started yet another song. "_I'm bringing sexy back, YEAH! Them other boys don't know how to act, YEAH! I think it's special, what's behind your back. So turn around and I'll make up the slack, YEAH! Take it to the bridge!" _Ivan couldn't help but giggle as Alfred practically yelled the next part of the song. "_Girly babe! You see these shackles baby I'm your slave!" _Alfred suddenly opened the door in mid song to find Ivan standing there, laughing. He paused and blushed, then grinned seductively. "_I'll let you whip me if I misbehave! It's just that no one makes me feel this way!"_ Alfred caressed Ivan's cheek, winking at him. Ivan blushed and laughed.

"Did you already put the second batch of cookies in?" Ivan nodded at Alfred's question, getting a nod in return from the inquirer. "Cool beans. You can shower, then, and I'll watch the cookies." Ivan nodded and headed to his room, grabbing some clothes and heading back to the very steamy bathroom, still grinning from Alfred's singing. He started the water, getting undressed after he pulled the tab up to start the water. He liked having the bathtub/shower combo, it came in handy for when he needed to rewind. Now, though, he let the water run over him as he grabbed the shampoo, slicking it over his hands and washing his hair.

Alfred danced about in the kitchen to his music, not singing this time. He grinned, seeing the timer still had eleven minutes left on it. He began to wonder how Ivan had gotten so good at dancing. Actually, he wanted to ask him. _Right now._ He walked to the bathroom, knocking on the door. "Ivan, can I come in? I want to ask you something." Ivan sent him a muffled "sure," and Alfred opened the door cautiously. He looked at the mirror was so steamy that he couldn't see anything in it. He turned to look at the shower curtain, seeing Ivan's silhouette. His eyes traveled about it, blushing and looking away as Ivan turned a bit, his silhouette showing that he was pretty well endowed.

"What is it, Alfred?" He ran the conditioner through his hair. Alfred turned and looked away. "I-I was going to ask h-how you got so good at dancing." His blush was still tinting his cheeks. "Let's save the story for another time, alright?" Alfred nodded before realizing Ivan couldn't see that. "Sure." There was a moment of silence in which Alfred was content to stare at the floor. "Alfred?" "Yes?" "The cookies are still in the oven." Alfred blinked. "Oh yeah. I'll go check on those." Alfred left the bathroom as Ivan turned the water off, hearing the timer go off. Alfred grabbed the oven mitts, pulling the sheet out and setting it on the stove. He put the mitts away, iPod still playing softly in the corner.

-**ooo**-

"Goodnight, Alfred." Ivan smiled sweetly at Alfred, waving. "Yeah, night. Sleep well." Alfred smiled back at him before looking up at the ceiling. He sighed softly, feeling the tiredness run through his body as he closed his eyes. He laid there a while, unable to find sleep. He rolled over to check his phone, seeing nothing there. He sighed and laid on his back again. He waited more for time to pass, for sleep to find him, yet it didn't. Alfred picked up his phone, getting on YouTube to watch his favorite gamer play some horror game. Man, he loved those things. He grabbed earphones from his bag and popped them in, staring at the screen as the gamer did his intro. Alfred, settled in, watching for a bit before accidentally falling asleep, phone falling onto his stomach as he slept, body relaxing. He snuggled into the blankets, earphones staying in his ears.

"_DEAR GOD, NO! PLEASE NO!_" Alfred jolted upright, breath catching in his throat as the scream jump started his heart, pounding roughly in his chest. He looked around, the room too dark to see anything. Alfred looked down to see his iPod still on, the gamer crying out as he was killed by the monster. Alfred took a few deep breaths, shutting off the electronic and laying down again.

Alfred fell into a restless sleep, rolling about on the couch. He was soon awake again, the nightmare forcing him out of his sleep brutally. Alfred had never had a scarier dream in his life, though he couldn't remember exactly what it was. While he racked his brain for what had scared him so badly, he shuddered, body shaking in fear. He lay there, grasping the blankets tightly in his fist. Then, suddenly from down the hall he heard footsteps, the floor boards creaking in protest. Alfred's eyes welled up with tears, scared shitless. A dark figure appeared from the hallway, movements slow and groggy.

"Please, don't hurt me!" Alfred his under his blanket as the figure jumped back, obviously startled by the sudden outburst. "A-Alfred? What's wrong?" Alfred poked his head out from the blanket, looking at a worried Ivan. "Just a n-nightmare." He felt like a total sissy saying it, but it was true, and he knew Ivan wouldn't laugh. "You can sleep with me tonight, if it'll make you feel better." Alfred made a small sound that was similar to "yes please." Ivan just nodded and walked to the kitchen. It sounded as though he was getting a glass of water, then returned to the living room. Ivan reached out to take Alfred's hand, taking him from the couch and leading him to his bedroom. He drank some of the water, then got back into bed, Alfred taking the other side and curling up next to Ivan, still shaking a bit. Ivan stroked the blond's hair until he was asleep, Ivan smiling and finding his own dreams once more.

**Translations:**

Da—Yes

Nyet—No

Vsevyshniy—God

**Note:** As I was writing this chapter, I tended to miss the "r" in pantry, causing it to become panty. If, by chance, I missed one of those terrible mistakes, please tell me. I'll die and thank you immensely.


	5. Hearing Damage

**A/N:** I'm back. Again. Is something wrong with me, or am I just bored? Ah, whichever one it is, I'm still writing and you people are still reading, so I'll continue to update. **This chapter has major warnings for talk of eating disorders, abuse, and extreme alcohol use. Nothing is actually done in this chapter, but there is serious talk of it.** I'm warning you now. If you don't want to read that, but don't want to miss a chapter, you can Pm me to get the overview without the bad stuff. I don't own Hetalia or any of the music.

Ivan couldn't figure out why he was so warm. His body seemed to be a heater, radiating heat that just bounced off the blankets and hit him hard. He moved to kick off the blankets, feeling a weight on his chest. His eyes opened to see a blond boy curled up to him, head resting on Ivan's chest. He blinked, last night coming back to him. Something about a nightmare… And him letting Alfred crash in his bed to make him feel safer. Ivan held Alfred close, not even minding the heat now. It was cuddle heat.

Alfred's eyelids flickered back and forth, his body shaking slightly all of a sudden, his face darkened. Ivan's eyebrows shot up in concern, just holding him close. Alfred mumbled something totally unintelligible under his breath, shuddering and whimpering. Ivan watched as Alfred's eyes flew open, locking with his instantly. Alfred looked at Ivan in a panic, blinking rapidly a few times. "I-Ivan." Alfred wrapped his arms around Ivan, taking in the relaxing scent he had grown to love so much. Ivan stroked Alfred's hair gently, eyes closing a bit. They had all day; both had scheduled to take the day off to relax a bit more.

"It's okay, it's okay." Ivan held Alfred close. Alfred nodded and focused on breathing. He still couldn't remember what he'd dreamt of, but it was still scaring him. Alfred shook his head. "Can we go back to sleep?" Ivan looked at him a moment. "Ah, if you want to. I am pretty awake now, and I was thinking about making some coffee. Why don't you sleep for a while longer, and when you are awake again you can come and join me." Alfred nodded slightly, closing his eyes as Ivan stood up, straightening his shirt. He stretched as he walked to the kitchen.

As he reached the far side of the kitchen he hit the on button on the coffee maker, getting a mug down from the cupboard. Ivan preferred his coffee black, but he got the creamer out from the fridge for Alfred when he woke up. He stood in the kitchen, looking out the window at the bleak morning. Where had yesterday's weather gone? Yesterday had been gorgeous; the sun had actually shown its face. Ivan sighed, not liking the new version of the outdoors. Ivan looked down to realize he was missing his scarf. He frowned a bit and snuck down the hallway, tapping the door to make it swing open. He looked at Alfred, who had already turned himself ninety degrees, head and legs hanging off the side of the bed. He had dark circles under his eyes, skin a bit pale from his most recent scare.

Chuckling silently at Alfred's new position, Ivan went to retrieve his scarf from the bedside table. As he picked it up, he knocked Alfred's glasses to the floor, thankfully not breaking them, but making quite the loud noise. Ivan winced, peering up at Alfred's sleeping form to see that he hadn't moved an inch. Ivan exhaled, picking the glasses up and putting them on the bedside table once more. He wrapped the scarf around his neck, pressed a kiss to Alfred's forehead, then tiptoed out of the room, closing the door as quietly as he could behind him.

He meandered back to the kitchen, watching as coffee dripped from the machine into the pot. Once the coffee was done, he poured the black substance into the mug, the steam rising from it and hitting his face. He inhaled, eyes closing a moment before he looked outside once more. It had begun to rain and thunder some, the water pattering against the windows. Ivan sat at the small table in the corner of the room, still staring out the windows.

Ivan didn't hear Alfred walk in behind him, causing him to start slightly when Alfred wrapped his arms around Ivan's neck. It'd only been half an hour since Ivan had come out. Ivan turned to look at a sleep deprived Alfred, his eyes closed. Ivan took one of Alfred's pale hands, feeling his shaking. "Alfred? What's wrong?" Alfred shook his head. "I finally figured out what the stupid nightmare was. It's one from when I was a kid. I… I get shot. I guess it's just still really scary for me." Ivan frowned and stood up, taking Alfred's hand and pulling him to the living room.

He pulled Alfred down next to him, holding him close again. "I want to do something that will make the dream stop. Stay here a moment, I'll be right back, podsolnukh." Ivan blushed at the sudden use of a cutesy name. _Podsolnukh? He's not a fucking plant, Ivan. He's Alfred, not a sunflower._ Ivan scolded himself mentally as he went to go get a piece of paper and a pen. He returned to Alfred, sitting next to him so that their hips were touching. "Alfred, I want you to draw the main idea of your dream on this piece of paper. Okay?" Alfred looked at Ivan, expression full of confusion and tiredness. "I guess?" Alfred took the paper and drew a line then stopped. "Ivan, I don't think I can do this. It's kinda fucking scary."

Ivan pulled Alfred into some form of a side hug. "It's alright, Alfred. It's going to help you, I promise" Alfred nodded some, hand shaking as he held his pen to the paper. He began to draw himself on the ground, eyes still open, a gaping hole left in his chest as blood spilled out of it. Alfred was actually a good drawer, which Ivan supposed made it worse for him. Ivan put a gentle hand on his leg, nodding encouragingly. When Alfred finished he looked at it, then thrust it at Ivan. Shaking his head, Ivan gently pushed the picture back to Alfred. "Rip it up." Alfred looked at him blankly for a moment, then nodded, grasping the paper at the top and pulling down violently, the paper ripping in half. "Again." Alfred tore it again, feeling a certain power over his dream suddenly. He then began to rip it over and over and over.

Finally, Alfred handed the extremely small shreds to Ivan, breathing a bit heavy. Ivan smiled some, holding the paper that looked as though it'd been put through a mechanical shredder. "See if that helps. It helped me when I was a kid and had nightmares all the time." Alfred looked up to Ivan in surprise. "You had nightmares? You… certainly don't seem the type to have nightmares." Ivan's smile faltered. "Ah, my childhood was not the best childhood someone could have." Alfred drew closer to him, wrapping his arms around him and snuggling into his side. "What do you mean?"

Ivan exhaled softly, ruffling Alfred's hair some. "My family was very unstable." Alfred nudged his ribs for him to go on, wanting more information. "I don't know if I can really talk about this, Alfred." The blond snuggling Ivan shook his head. "It's okay. You've helped me with my problem, and now I want to know more about you. Please?" Ivan sighed and closed his eyes. After a moment, he opened them and looked to the ceiling. His voice was very controlled when he finally spoke.

"My father was gone a lot. He went on very long trips throughout Russia. He was kind of the one who kept people safe, like a superhero. When he was home though, he would beat my mother with a pipe and leave great big gashes on her." Ivan's voice cut out, though he kept a straight face. After a few seconds he continued. "To bear all that, my mother drank a lot. She was often holding a bottle of vodka when she cooked, and when she slept that bottle stayed right next to her bed."

Alfred was now staring unblinkingly, a strong look of sympathy taking over his features. "My sister Natalya was anorexic. She spent most of her time watching me, for some reason, never ate when we did. Katyusha was bulimic. I think her best friend was the bathroom floor. She always avoided everyone." Ivan's eyes closed again, head falling back against the couch back. "And me? I was alone for the most part, save Natalya's stares. I never really had friends, or someone to talk to, so I sat by myself for long periods of time." Ivan went silent, unsure of what to say next. That pretty much had summed up his entire childhood.

When Alfred said nothing, Ivan looked down only to find Alfred reaching up to his face. Alfred's cool fingers gently ran along Ivan's jaw line, causing Ivan to shiver slightly. They looked at each other for a few minutes, not able to say anything to the other. Neither had realized how close together they were until Alfred's lips were pressed gently to Ivan's both of their eyes closing. Ivan gently ran his fingers through Alfred's hair, a blushing visiting his cheeks. Alfred slowly pulled back before looking up at Ivan. "I'm so sorry." He hugged Ivan close, blushing. "Don't worry about it. It is fine." Ivan stroked Alfred's hair as he hugged him, holding him close.

Both were still blushing as they sat there. Ivan was still surprised he'd kissed Alfred. That was okay, right? He liked Alfred. A lot. And Alfred liked him too, right? Why else would he have kissed Ivan? The same thought process was going on in Alfred's head, though it was blurred together with Ivan's terrible past. The two stayed like that together for a little while, then Ivan pulled Alfred up to look at him. "Alfred, we shouldn't dwell on these things right now. Would you like to do something?" Alfred looked up to him, nodded slowly.

"I want you to teach me to dance." Alfred's voice was quiet from the accustomed silence in the room, barely over a whisper. Ivan sighed. "Why are you so set on learning this? And from someone who is not very good?" Alfred shrugged. "Well, I will teach you another day. But for now, let's do something else." Nodding, Alfred stood up and stretched, his shirt coming up to show his lovely bronze hips and the dip between them. Ivan looked away, blushing ever so slightly again.

Eventually, the two were up and in the kitchen, Ivan reheating his forgotten coffee. He took it from the microwave, sipping at the scalding hot coffee; it was just how he liked it. He sat down and gently pulled Alfred back down onto his lap, holding him close. He couldn't help but wonder what Alfred thought of him. He would save that conversation for a later date as today had already been emotionally taxing on the both of them. The two sat together, slowly starting a conversation.

"So, you really think you'll end up being the crazy cat guy when you get older, Alfred?" Ivan smiled teasingly at Alfred who grinned. "In all seriousness, no. It could happen, of course, but I like to think that there's someone who will be with me." Alfred smiled a bit more, blushing again. Today seemed to be the day for blushing for the two of them. The two talked for a while, still unsure of what to do with themselves.

"How about a movie?" Alfred's interest seemed to strike Ivan's fancy, and so they made some popcorn and sat together to watch some comedy romances on the couch, the rain still beating on the windows. Ivan eventually fell asleep, still holding Alfred close to him. Alfred didn't mindAt this point, though, rain couldn't possibly bother them.

**Translations:**

Podsolnukh—Sunflower

**Note: **This chapter was a bit darker than the others, so I made it kinda short. This should be the only one that really has anything like that for a few chapters. I promise.


	6. Heart's a Mess

**A/N:** Hello again, everyone! I want to tell you guys my writing routine really fast because I think some of you will find it really interesting. First, I get some peach green tea from the fridge. Then, I light the candle next to my bed. Then I put on my Ivan-esque scarf. Then I open my laptop and open word. xD Wonderful, no? This chapter's warnings are for some FRAUK and Francis acting as a therapist. I don't own Hetalia at all. Also, the updates on this story may start coming less because I'm starting another fanfic. I'll try to update them equally.

Ivan kissed Alfred's forehead before they went separate ways on the sidewalk. "Have a good day, alright?" Ivan's smile was sweet and sincere as Alfred nodded. "Yeah, you too! I'll see you at five." Ivan nodded in response as they waved goodbye to each other. The sidewalk was still damp from yesterday's rain, wetting his shoes as he turned to look at Alfred's back. Ivan's scarf billowed about him with the little breeze in the air today, tickling his neck as it always did. He made his way to the flower shop, pushing the door open to be greeted by the warm smell of flowers.

"Morning, Francis." Ivan called through the store, removing his coat and setting it behind the counter. He heard a great deal of shuffling from the back room, and as he looked up he saw another man walking out from the back room. "Arthur! You forgot your wallet, mon cher!" Francis ran out from the back, holding a wallet in his hand. He handed it to the other guy who smiled a bit. "Thanks." With that, they waved awkwardly at each other, then 'Arthur' left the store.

"Who was that?" Ivan was pretty curious who the guy was and why he was in the back room. Though, he wouldn't pry, he would ask a few questions if he could. "Uh, a very good friend." He nodded to Ivan. "We have a lot of orders to get done today; the town's high school has their formal tolo this weekend, and everyone is ordering stuff early." Ivan nodded. It was this time of year he remembered most from high school. Everyone gushing about who was going with whom, and himself reading books to pass time and block out everyone's conversations.

Ivan went to the counter, looking at the list of orders for boutineers and corsages. He decided he ought to get to work, so he walked back to the back fridge, taking out some orange roses and blue ribbon. He brought everything to the arranging table, double checking the order before quickly cutting the rose to its appropriate length, working on wrapping the ribbon around as needed. He had it done quickly, and he put it in a little box of fluffy folded paper strips that was something like spaghetti-confetti.

Francis moved to stand beside him. "My, that was fast. Did you have a decent weekend?" Ivan nodded and grinned slightly, a blush barely tinting his cheeks. Francis seemed to notice the blush, laughing softly. "Oh-ho ho! I see now. What did you two do this weekend?" Ivan looked at Francis before starting the second orange rose order. He grabbed the white ribbon from under the table. "Well, let's see. I taught Alfred to make cookies." Francis laughed softly. "I see. How'd that go for you?" Ivan shrugged. "Well, other than my kitchen being covered in flour, it was good." Francis smiled, running back to grab he red roses to start working on those orders.

"So he knows how to make cookies now. That's good." Ivan looked to Francis. "Francis, did you ever think of becoming a psychologist? Because you totally could kick ass at that job." Ivan and Francis both laughed. "I actually thought about it, but then decided I love flowers far more than sitting in an office all day." Francis smiled warmly at Ivan, both working away at different flower pieces. "I think you need to tell me who that man was, Francis." Alfred grinned at Francis who blushed bright red and looked down to his shoes. "Ah, just a friend, mon cher." Ivan raised his eyebrows. "A friend who leaves his wallet behind and looks disheveled? Aha." Francis was blushing terribly. "He's… A friend I met at the party. The one who owns the company." Ivan raised his eyebrows. "Alfred's father?" Francis jumped back a bit, eyes flicking up to Ivan.

"A-ah, yeah. Him." Francis rubbed the back of his neck. "Speaking of Alfred, I heard he's staying at your house." Ivan raised his eyebrows. "Oh? And who'd you hear that from?" Francis smiled. "Your neighbor came in to get flowers and said he'd seen you and some blond guy heading up to your room." Ivan sighed and shrugged. "Yeah." They stood in silence a moment before Francis spoke up once more. "Oh, Ivan, we're getting a shipment of new stuff tomorrow. More sunflowers, and I decided to try some of those little iron flowers. They seem to be very popular in other stores, and I think it'll increase our profit. If that's the case, you can work less, Ivan." Ivan stopped what he was doing and looked up at Francis. "Work less?" He was somewhat shocked. "What do you mean?"

"I mean that you can work less for the same amount or more. You do wonderful work around here, Ivan." Francis looked over at the displays. "Those are all gorgeous, mon cher." Francis smiled at Ivan, who's expression was pure shock. "Are you serious, Francis?" When Francis nodded Ivan blinked a few times, looking down and smiling a bit. Less work meant more time with Alfred, and that meant he was happier. Ivan beamed up at Francis suddenly. "Do you like the idea, mon ami?" Ivan nodded. "Well, we'll see what happens tomorrow." The two continued their work, both happy.

-**ooo-**

"That's really what he said?" Alfred was grinning from ear to ear. Ivan nodded, affirming that what he'd told him was purely the truth. "Wow! That's so great! We'll get to hang out more!" Alfred leapt off the couch to hug Ivan tightly. The stood in the middle of Ivan's living room, in a warm, strong embrace once more. "And I'm going to start saving up to buy a car, too. That way you don't have to walk everywhere." Alfred just hugged Ivan tighter, holding him close to the point where Ivan wasn't able to breathe. "Alfred… Lungs…" Ivan gasped as Alfred pulled back, blushing. "Sorry, I didn't realize I was hugging you so hard." Alfred looked down and Ivan stroked his cheek. "It is fine. You are pretty fucking buff, you know that?" Alfred laughed and flexed his arm muscles. "Nah." The two both laughed, Alfred taking Ivan's hand.

"We should celebrate! Have a drink, or something." Alfred proposed his idea to Ivan, looking to his face to see what he'd like to do. "I don't have any alcohol in the house, and it's too late to go out." Alfred looked to the clock then frowned. Pretty much everything was closed at eleven at night. "Hmm. Well, let's celebrate somehow."

The two thought for a moment, hands still interlocked. Ivan finally looked down at Alfred. "Tell you what. To celebrate, I'll teach you to dance." Alfred's eyes widened, a smile pulling his lips into a wonderful curve. "Really? Oh god, I'm so excited! Yay! Yay!" Alfred then began to jump for joy, only to be stopped by a laughing Ivan. "Calm down, podsolnukh. Why don't you grab your iPod and choose a song for us?" Alfred nodded and grabbed his phone, scrolling through his music. "Oh gosh, Ivan, we need to do the Harlem Shake sometime." Ivan rolled his eyes. "No, Alfred. Anything but that." Alfred laughed, then nodded. "How about What Goes Around Comes Around by Justin Timberlake?" Alfred looked to Ivan. "Let's listen to it really fast." Alfred put it on the dock and hit play. Ivan nodded his head with the beat, thinking about different movements for the song.

"It's a pretty long song." Alfred nodded at Ivan's words. "Let's start with something shorter." Alfred shuffled through his iPod more. "How about Daylight by Maroon 5?" Ivan knew that one already. "Sure, that's a good one. Okay, so first thing's first, you need to learn to move properly. Turn some music on, I'll teach you the basics." Alfred hit the shuffle button, letting Rihanna float softly through the room. Ivan picked up the beat quickly, hips moving with it. He began to teach Alfred to move about properly. Alfred was extremely flexible, which had really surprised Ivan.

After an hour and a half, Alfred was being taught different turns and positions. They'd gone through artists from Maroon 5 to Linkin Park. "Does that make sense?" Ivan looked at Alfred. "Yeah, I think so." Ivan nodded. "Alright, try it yourself now." Alfred listened to the Lady Gaga that was running about the room, getting a reminder that he really needed to clean his iPod out. Alfred brought his right hand to his shoulder, brushing against it and pushing it away, head moving in the opposite direction before flowing directly into the next movement, arms moving out to the side before kicking his left leg back, head tilting back at the same time he did everything else. Ivan was impressed; Alfred had picked everything up extremely quickly. Alfred mused with a few of his own ideas after he'd done what Ivan taught him. Ivan watched with a small smile. "You've got a natural talent for this, really."

Alfred laughed, shaking his head. "Nah. I just kinda go off what you teach, and you're a good teacher." Ivan laughed and wrapped his arms around Alfred, kissing his forehead. "What? It's true. Hey… Where's your scarf?" Alfred kissed Ivan's neck, smiling and holding him close, music still playing in the background. "Must've left it at work…" Ivan wasn't too concerned about his precious scarf at the moment. "Alfred…" Ivan stopped and looked down at the blond who looked right back up at him; they'd started swaying gently. "Hmm?" Ivan blushed. "Ah, I was just going to say that you're just… really cute. That's all." Ivan looked away, blushing. God, why did he have to be so awkward?

Alfred gasped and blushed. "You really think so?" Ivan nodded, blush reaching the tips of his ears as he nodded. Alfred smiled and kissed Ivan softly, only lingering at his lips for a few seconds. "I think you're pretty cute too, Ivan." The two looked at each other, both blushing, though Ivan far more than Alfred. They both leaned in a bit, Ivan leaning down and Alfred attempting to keep his balance on his tiptoes as they pressed their lips together, arms still around each other. They played it safe for a bit before Alfred decided to change the game a bit. He parted his lips gently, running his tongue along Ivan's bottom lip. Ivan was a bit surprised, but didn't show it; he instead parted his own lips, letting his own tongue taste Alfred's.

Ivan gently ran a hand through Alfred's hair, inhaling his sweet scent as they kissed, gasping softly as Alfred hopped up and wrapped his legs around Ivan's waist. He grabbed Alfred's thighs, holding him up. Alfred pulled back a moment to look at Ivan. "You're pretty strong." Ivan laughed. "Not really." Ivan moved backwards to the couch, sitting so that Alfred was still sitting on his lap, legs wrapped tightly around Ivan. They resumed the kiss where they'd left off, tongues swirling together gently.

Suddenly, Ivan's phone began to ring on the kitchen counter, causing Ivan to pull back. "Fuck, that's Francis. What's he calling me for?" Alfred whined softly but crawled off of Ivan's lap, trying to get himself to calm down some. He'd gotten himself a bit worked up with Ivan and was sad that Ivan was going to answer the damn phone. He sat on the couch, watching Ivan run to get the phone. "Hello?" There was a pause. "T-the shades?" Ivan turned to look at the window right above the couch back, the shades open. Alfred looked at Ivan questioningly, wondering what was going on. Ivan had turned a cute shade of pink before he walked over to the window and pulled the shades shut. "You have a keycard, I don't get why you don't just come up." Another pause. "Yeah, thanks. See you in a second." Ivan hit the end button and tossed the phone back on the counter, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Alfred, remind me to close the shades more often."

Alfred looked at Ivan, confused. "What?" Ivan walked to sit back on the couch. "I hadn't been expecting anyone to be looking up here. Leave it to Francis to pick the worst times… it is past midnight, anyways!" He scowled at the ground, Alfred now getting the point. "He saw that?" Ivan nodded and Alfred looked at him a moment before laughing. "Well, that's awkward." Ivan nodded a bit as the door was knocked on. Ivan stood and walked to the door, opening it. "Hello, Francis. Care to come in?" Francis nodded, walking inside holding Ivan's scarf and wallet. "You forgot these, mon ami." Ivan nodded a bit. "I knew I had misplaced them somewhere."

Francis looked past Ivan to Alfred, smiling and wiggling his fingers at him. "Hello, Alfred. Nice to see you." Alfred smiled and waved. "You too, bro." Francis looked back at Ivan. "Sorry to 'interrupt' you two. I need to get home, though." Francis put air quotes around interrupted. He said his goodbyes and was gone sooner than he'd come. "How awkward." Ivan looked back at Alfred and nodded. "Tell me about it." He went to sit back on the couch. "And it's really late, Alfred. We both have to work tomorrow, so we should get to bed." Alfred nodded and yawned in agreement. "Carry me?" Ivan looked down at Alfred. "Really?" Alfred nodded tiredly, and Ivan sighed. He slipped his arms under Alfred's back and under his knees, picking him up easily. He walked them to his bedroom, gently setting Alfred down on the other side of the bed. As he went to take his arms away, Alfred reached up and gently held his palms to Ivan's cheeks, kissing him passionately, yet firmly. When he let go of Ivan, he saw that he was smiling. Ivan kissed Alfred's forehead, then went to his side of the bed, turned out the light, and went to sleep.

-**ooo-**

"Ivan, the delivery boy's here!" Francis's yelling came from the front of the store, causing Ivan's heart to speed up and his gut to flutter about like a trapped butterfly. He put down the sunflower he'd had in his hand, wiping his hands on his apron. He walked to the front of the building. "Hello, Alfred. What have you got for us today?" Alfred smiled as he held the clipboard out to Ivan. "Well, some flowers, both natural and iron, and a… a bench." Ivan laughed, signing the clipboard. "Francis didn't tell me we ordered a bench." They both laughed as Francis yelled from the back, "Hey, Ivan! I ordered a bench!" It was a bit too late, but he'd said it none the less. "Alright, well I'll help you unload the truck, then." Alfred nodded and led the way out the door, opening the back of the truck. Ivan grabbed a few bunches of sunflowers, spotting the bench. It was a pretty deep blue, the paint purposely chipped in some places to give is a certain style. Ivan smiled. "I like the bench. I'm not sure what he need it for, but it's cute." They'd gotten furniture to sell before, but never a full sized sitting bench.

They brought everything into the building, the flowers on the arrangement table, the bench going into the back of the store. Ivan gave Alfred a quick hug before he left, smiling and patting his back. "See you after work." Alfred nodded and pressed a gentle kiss to Ivan neck, then walked out the door and got in his truck, pulling away. Ivan sighed and leaned against the front counter as he had when Alfred had first come into the shop. Once Ivan's gut had stopped fluttering, he went about putting the flowers away, then started making a new display of the iron flowers. He was very sure these were going to sell; they were pretty and never died.

After he'd done that, he worked on more tolo orders, finishing off the entire list in the rest of the afternoon. Francis inspected his work, smiling. "These are all very wonderful, cher. You're a natural at this." Ivan smiled. "Thanks." Francis patted his back. "Why don't you take some flowers home for Alfred? On the house, alright?" Ivan put his hands up. "Oh, no! I couldn't. I can just buy them from you." Francis shook his head and grinned. "Nope. Take that bunch of roses over there, and head home. Make him dinner. Find some candles, or something. Make it cutesy." Ivan laughed, not wanting to argue. "Yes sir. I'll have to run by the store to get the candles." Francis laughed then went into the back, bringing some unopened candles to Ivan. "Here, these are unscented taper candles. I know you have a taper holder, I've seen it in your house." Ivan looked at them and then took them hesitantly. "I can't take these from you, Francis."

"I insist, mon cher. Here, in payment for these, you just have to tell me how your night goes, alright?" Ivan laughed and nodded, thanking Francis and picking his things up. "Alright, go home." Francis smiled at Ivan as he left, leaving his boss alone in the flower shop. He half skipped half walked home. He was pretty excited to do this for Alfred, but nervous. What if Alfred didn't like it? Ivan became extremely nervous, but pushed that feeling back, deciding to replace it with more exciting, positive thoughts. Alfred would love dinner, and they'd just hang out together. Maybe dance more, or something.

"No matter what we do, we are going to have a wonderful time." Ivan reassured himself, excitement bubbling up inside him as he pulled his keycard out of his pocket, heading inside.

**Translations: **

Podsolnukh—Sunflower

Mon cher—My dear

Mon ami—My friend

**Note:** Cliffhanger much? I'm sorry! I was running out of time for the evening… My candle's running low and my gum has lost its flavor, anyways. Thanks for all the reviews, guys! I never thought this would actually be read by people! Thank you all! C:


	7. Flume

**A/N: **Hello again! This chapter is mostly going to be seriously rated M RusAme. Strong language, a type of gambling warning, and some sexy times. I don't own Hetalia, still.

Ivan put the candle and roses on the kitchen counter, taking a deep breath. He stowed his recently used key in his back pocket, taking a deep breath before looking at the clock. He had exactly two hours to make dinner and get things ready for Alfred. This was such a spur of the moment thing he hadn't even thought of a reason for all of this. Perhaps it was continuing the celebration from last night? Whatever the reason, he was going to make sure everything was fucking awesome.

Ivan grabbed his laptop from his room, pulling it to the kitchen. He waited for it to boot up before opening Pandora, putting it on the Bon Iver station. He pulled some chicken out of the freezer, then thought as he popped it in the microwave, hitting the defrost button. "Hmm. Chicken Cordon Bleu?" Ivan shrugged and nodded. That was a pretty fancy dinner, and he was pretty sure he had the stuff. He went about grabbing things and setting them down on the counter.

Once the chicken was defrosted, Ivan grabbed a knife from the set next to the sink. He cut the pieces open, leaving a hinge of meat so they could close and open as needed. He put everything in the chicken, closing them and rolling them in the bread crumbs. He washed his hands, grabbed a baking sheet from under the counter, then put the soon to be dinner on it. He slid that into the oven and washed his hands again. He set a timer for forty minutes, then turned to the rest of the kitchen. He pulled the small table from the corner into the center of the room, going to his closet and grabbing a small white bed sheet. Ivan brought it back to the kitchen, laying it over the table; it would work nicely as a table cloth.

Ivan dug around under the sink until he found a decent looking vase, washing it out in the sink before setting it on the counter. He brought the roses over, taking them out of their plastic restraints. He snipped the stems to make them a bit shorter, then put them in the vase, adding water. He smiled, then set those on the table, moving the chairs over to be on either side. He had half an hour left when the chicken came out. He made a salad to go with it, setting both the chicken and newly made salad on the table, two plates in front of either chair. Ivan went to go shower, quickly washing his hair and conditioning it, washing himself up. When he was done, he hopped out and went to his room, prying the closet door open once again.

Ivan pulled out a nicer black button up shirt and a pair of dress-ish jeans. He wasn't going to go full formal on Alfred, he just wanted to look nice. Ivan decided to leave his scarf on his bedside table, getting the feeling he wouldn't be needing it. He did feel oddly bare without it, though. It was only after everything was set that he realized he ought to call Alfred and tell him he was already home. He fished his phone out of his coat pocket on his bed, dialing Alfred who picked up on the first ring. "Hey, Ivan. I was just leaving work." Ivan exhaled, glad he hadn't started going to the floral shop like he normally did. "Oh, alright. Well, Francis let me come home early, so just come straight here. Text me when you're here." There was a smile in Alfred's voice as he responded. "Oh, sure! Talk to you later, Ivan." They said their goodbyes and hung up.

setting them on little dishes on the table. Ivan lit them, the warm light danced about as he lowered the lights. He rather liked having dimmable lights, especially now. He sat down at the table, taking a deep breath, crossing his fingers that everything would go well. His phone vibrated, interrupting his thoughts. He opened it and read the text. "_I'm here, see you in a few"_ Ivan smiled and ran to the door, opening it and closing it behind him, running down the stairs. He took a mere second to compose himself before he opened the door for Alfred.

"Well, hello there. You look really nice, Ivan." Alfred and Ivan smiled at each other before Ivan stepped to the side some, Alfred walking in as the door shut behind him. "Thank you, podsolnukh." Ivan kissed Alfred's forehead before they began to climb the stairs. "So why do you look so fancy, Ivan?" Alfred took his hand, looking at the man beside him. "I'll explain when we get upstairs." They reached the top of the stairs and Ivan opened the door, gesturing for Alfred to enter first. As Alfred walked in, he spotted the whole cliché candle lit dinner and felt his stomach jump around a bit. "Woah!" His smile was huge as he turned to look at Ivan. "Well, there's your explanation, Alfred." Alfred laughed and hugged Ivan, then walked to the table.

"These roses are really gorgeous." Ivan walked to pull Alfred's chair out for him, smiling. "Francis let me have them." Alfred blushed and giggled slightly, sitting down. He grinned up at Ivan who went to go take his own seat. "How was your day?" Ivan folded his hands in his lap, smiling over at Alfred. "Oh, it was really great, and this is really just the icing on the cake. All of my deliveries today were super easy, actually." Ivan nodded and smiled. "Which one was the best?" Alfred laughed. "Either the one to the bakery, or the one to the Victoria's Secret. It's always funny to walk into such an odd place for me, for some reason, so it's always fun to deliver there." Ivan laughed and nodded. "I see. I've never been in that place, but I'll take your word." Alfred grinned. "You're a normal guy, then."

They began to eat the dinner Ivan had made, talking back and forth about their day with Alfred making little sounds of delight every so often. Soon, both of them had finished their dinner, and Ivan stood and cleared their plates. "So, the rest of the evening I didn't really plan, so it's up to you what we do. It's only seven thirty, so we really have quite a few options." Ivan suddenly felt silly for forgetting the rest of the night. "Well, I don't really feel like going out, so let's stay here and watch a movie, or something." Alfred smiled at Ivan, who nodded and smiled. "Sure. Why don't you go ahead and go pick out a movie and I'll finish in here." Alfred nodded and walked to the living room, picking out some romance movie and putting it in the DVD player.

Ivan walked in a few minutes later, the dishes done. He sat on the couch next to a smiling Alfred, wrapping his arm around him. Alfred hit the play button on the remote, then curled into Ivan, eyes on the screen as the movie started. As it turned out, however, the movie was very slow, and hardly what one could call a romance. Alfred nuzzled Ivan's neck, wrapping his arms around him gently as he kissed the crook between Ivan's shoulder and neck, causing Ivan to look away from the screen. He ran his hand down Alfred's back, stopping just above his pants. Alfred smiled at Ivan, kissing his jaw softly. Ivan gently pulled Alfred into his lap, holding him close and peppering kisses around his nose and cheeks before kissing his lips softly, smiling as he pulled back.

"You know, this movie isn't really even a romance." Alfred frowned as he nodded towards the television. "I know." Ivan kissed Alfred's forehead softly. "We can stop watching if you would like." Alfred thought a moment and then nodded. "Do you know how to play poker?" Ivan blinked at Alfred's question. "Ah, it's been a while, but I know how to play. Did you want to play?" Alfred grinned mischievously. "Let's play strip poker!" Ivan blinked and blushed. "S-strip poker?" Alfred nodded. "Yeah, instead of betting an amount of money, you bet your clothing. If you win the hand, the person has to remove what the bet." Ivan laughed blushing. "Ah, s-sure. Let's play strip poker. I'll go grab some cards."

Alfred crawled off Ivan's lap, watching as Ivan walked to his bedroom to get the cards. As he came back, he opened the back of cards, setting them on the couch. He smiled timidly at Alfred, then closed the shades. "Just so that when you get your ass kicked, no one will see." Alfred scoffed, grinning. "Please. You mean when _you_ get your ass kicked, no one sees." They split the cards, each shuffling their half so that it was somewhat fair. They mixed the two together when they were done, then Alfred dealt the cards. "I bet shirt." Alfred glanced up to Ivan, waiting for his bet. "Shirt it is." They went through the hand, Ivan coming out victorious. Alfred huffed, then crossed his arms, grabbing the hem of his shirt and pulling the fabric up and over his head. Ivan leaned back on the couch, hands behind his head. "Ah, yes. When _I _get _my_ ass kicked. Sure." They dealt again. "I bet shirt." Alfred rolled his eyes. "I bet glasses." Ivan nodded, coming out victorious once again. Alfred removed his glasses, setting them on his shirt.

"I'm going to pull out of this, I will." Alfred bit his lip, dealing again. "I bet pants." Ivan nodded. "Shirt, again." Finally, Alfred won. Ivan's eyebrows went up, giving off an air of amusement. He undid the buttons one by one, being a bit of a tease. Alfred eyed him, grinning the whole time as Ivan shed his shirt, dropping it next to the couch. "See? Making a comeback here." Ivan rolled his eyes, smiling. "I bet pants." Alfred nodded. "Pants." They went through the hand, and Ivan won for the third time. "This is totally a comeback for you, Alfred. Mmm-hmm." Ivan laughed and Alfred blushed as he stood, unbuttoning his jeans and unzipping them, tugging them down slowly.

Ivan couldn't help but look over Alfred's body, his toned bronze chest moving slowly with his breathing. Ivan's eyes caught Alfred's, both grinning a bit. "What, like what you see?" Ivan nodded. "Most definitely. And, I think once you've run out of articles of clothing to remove, you'll have to start doing actions." Ivan raised his eyebrows at Alfred suggestively, causing Alfred to blush even more. "A-actions?" Ivan nodded, gesturing for him to sit back down so that they could continue their game.

"Pants." Ivan felt pretty good about this. He was good at poker, though he never played it. "Boxers." Alfred still had a light blush on his face from a few seconds ago. Ivan put his cards down, causing Alfred to smile. "Pants off, dearie." He tossed his cards down over Ivan's the full house staring up at Ivan. Laughing and blushing a bit, Ivan stood up and took his pants off as Alfred had. "It appears we're even, da?" Alfred nodded, standing back up to look at Ivan as he wrapped his arms around his neck. "Very muchly so. This should get interesting very quickly." The two laughed. "I'll admit, you're pretty damn hot without most of your clothes, Ivan." Alfred placed gentle open mouthed kisses along Ivan's neck, sending shivers down Ivan's spine. "I have to say the same about you." Ivan ran his fingers down Alfred's chest, an arm wrapping around his waist. Alfred smiled. "Then we should be damn hot together, hmm?" Alfred could feel himself getting worked up, a desire for friction slowly making itself known.

Alfred may not have known it, but Ivan was feeling the same thing. "We need to get this game done." Ivan nodded in response, removing his hands from Alfred's body and taking a seat back on his couch. "How about this. Whoever wins this round has to say a truth instead of stripping." Alfred looked to Ivan to see if he liked the idea; he already had an idea of what he'd say. He tilted his head from side to side, then nodded a bit. "Sure, that sounds like a deal." Alfred grinned. "Alright, truth on both sides." Ivan nodded in approval. As it happened, Ivan won again. Alfred looked to Ivan, pretending to think of what to say for a moment. Finally, he spoke. "Ivan, you're a total turn on."

Ivan blushed immediately, blinking and grinning. "Is that so?" Ivan leaned over their cards, kissing Alfred gently, a hand starting at his chest and moving down to feel his erection which was straining through his boxers. Ivan chuckled, slipping his hand into Alfred's boxers, gently grasping his cock and giving it a few teasingly slow strokes, kissing his neck. Alfred gasped and moaned Ivan's name softly, head tilting off to the side a bit. Ivan smiled, moving to kiss Alfred's lips firmly, his hand continuing its motion at a slow pace. Alfred closed his eyes, a hand moving to grab the hair at the back of Ivan's head, pulling him closer. Alfred's mind could only focus on the delicious friction he was receiving. Ivan laughed softly into Alfred's mouth, kissing and licking his way down Alfred's neck to the spot where his shoulder met his neck.

Ivan began to suck on the skin there, making Alfred whimper and his hips thrust up a bit into Ivan's hand. That would leave a nice hickey. Hearing Alfred whimper made Ivan's hand move faster, getting more moans from Alfred. He looked up at the man he was pleasing, smiling at the absolutely sexy expression on his face. Alfred opened his eyes, looking to Ivan and blushing. "S-so good…" Ivan's hand kept stroking Alfred, bringing him closer and closer. After a few moments, Alfred couldn't take it anymore. With a muffled moan Alfred came into Ivan's hand, panting softly. Ivan smiled, licking Alfred's cum off his fingers before kissing Alfred's forehead.

"A-ah. Thank you." Alfred smiled gratefully at Ivan who nodded. "It's really late, though, and we both have work tomorrow. We should really be getting to bed, podsolnukh." Alfred nodded once he'd caught his breath. "But what about you?" Ivan shook his head. "Next time. Let's go to bed." With that, Ivan picked Alfred up and carried him to the bedroom, laying him down on the bed. "Good night, Alfred." Ivan laid down on his side of the bed, pulling the blankets up. "G'night Ivan." And with that, they both fell asleep, their game of poker forgotten.

-**ooo**-

"Francis, that was the last one! We sold all of them!" Ivan ran into the back room, his grin giant. "The last iron flower?" Ivan nodded. "Wow, that's great! It looks like things are looking up. I'll order a new delivery tonight, then. We should be able to get more by tomorrow." Ivan nodded, still grinning. "You know what this means, mon cher. Only come on Tuesday through Friday, alright?" Ivan laughed. "What if I want to come in more?" Francis laughed. "I'll have to pay you more, then!" Ivan shook his head, smiling like an idiot. "Alright. Thanks Francis." Ivan adjusted his scarf and sent Alfred a text.

"_New work hours, here I come."_

**Translations: **

Podsolnukh—Sunflower

Da—Yes

Mon cher—My dear


	8. Good Morning Mr Magpie

**A/N**: Hi there, guys. I don't own Hetalia, or the board game Sorry. There's no smut in this chapter, I'll try not to write too much of that.

"Come on, Ivan, it's time to get up." It was already past the time where they normally walked to work, both of them obviously tired. Ivan didn't budge. "Ivan?" Ivan still didn't respond, chest rising and falling in blissful sleep. Alfred rolled Ivan over, straddling his body. "Ivaaaaaan. Get uuuuuup." Nothing. Alfred moved around a bit, trying to get Ivan to wake from his slumber. After ten minutes of trying to get him up, Alfred hadn't had any luck. He decided to get up and stretch a bit, eyeing the clock that told him he ought to be working right now. He frowned; while he ought to be at work, he felt bad for leaving Ivan by himself, especially since it was Ivan's first day of not having work on Fridays. He bit his lip, then decided to make a phone call, grabbing his phone and walking to the kitchen.

Alfred dialed Ludwig's number, waiting a few rings before he finally picked up. "Yes? Hello?" Alfred had never called in fake sick before; he made his voice sound a bit gruff. "Hey Luddy, I need to take the day off—I'm real sick." There was a grunt and the sounds of a pen scribbling things down on paper on the other end. "Very well. Get well, then." And with that, Ludwig hung up, successfully ending Alfred's first pretending-to-be-sick-but-not-really-sick call.

"Ivan!" Alfred's healthy sounding voice echoed down the hall. "Let's bake more stuff today! Let's bake bread!" Ivan's reply was muffled, causing Alfred to run down the hall and slide to a halt in the doorway of the bedroom. "What was that? Couldn't hear you." Ivan pulled the pillow off his head, looking at Alfred.

"We have to work, it's Friday." Alfred laughed softly. "Yeah, uh, obviously you've already forgotten your new work schedule. You don't have to work, and I took the day off!" Ivan muttered something into his sheets, then rolled over, snoring softly once more in a matter of seconds.

Alfred sighed, heading back to the kitchen and hitting the power button on the coffee pot. He stretched and looked at the clock. 8:15. He himself was actually still fairly tired, and he figured that he could sleep for half an hour while the coffee was brewed. He headed down the hall, turning left at the end and walking into the bedroom. He walked to his side of the bed and flopped down, being reminded how blissfully comfy the bed was from five minutes ago. He rolled and snuggled into Ivan, wrapping his arms around him and holding him close. He soon fell back into a restful sleep. So much for baking.

-**ooo**-

They both had been far more tired than they had originally thought. The two both woke up around noon, stretching and yawning some, their bodies entangled still from when Alfred had returned. The blanket and body heat were too much put together. Ivan kicked the blankets off, stretching more. "Alfred, what time is it?" He turned his head to Alfred, rubbing his eyes lackadaisically. "Around noon." Ivan blinked. "Noon? Why aren't you at work?" Alfred smiled some. "We've gone over this already this morning, dear." Ivan gave him a look of confusion. "No we didn't." Ivan couldn't recall a conversation about Alfred's work attendance for the life of him. "You don't remember? Well, I guess that'd make sense. You were still half asleep at the time." Alfred laughed softly, ruffling Ivan's hair. "It's alright. I already called Ludwig this morning, so he knows where I am." Ivan wasn't sure if he liked the idea of Alfred not going to work, however he wasn't given much time to think about it as Alfred began to speak again.

"Let's bake! Or dance! Let's dance some more and bake, Ivan!" Ivan couldn't stop the small smile that snuck its way onto Ivan's lips, Alfred's enthusiasm was just so adorable. "How about we bake, then I can teach you more stuff?" Alfred nodded excitedly. "Alright!" He practically bounced out of bed, smiling at Ivan, who was the opposite of Alfred in his manner of getting up. He looked about torpidly before flinging his legs off the side of the bed, sitting up slowly. Once the two were both up, they made their way to the kitchen where Alfred heated up coffee and Ivan got out an old recipe book. He flipped through a few pages before landing on a recipe for flax seed bread.

"Alfred, will you please grab the flour, sugar, and measuring cups?" Alfred nodded, walking about and getting everything in his arms. "Here." He set everything down on the counter, watching as Ivan got a large bowl mixer from under the counter. He plugged it in and began adding ingredients, getting the yeast from the fridge. Ivan explained things as he went along, point to this and that on the recipe, asking Alfred if he knew why you had to add this to the mix before that, and explaining why if he didn't know.

Finally, they got to the fun part of making bread. "Alright, so you knead it, then you can braid it, or make fun shapes out of it." Ivan went through the motions of kneading, watching Alfred closely as he pushed at the dough and then pulled back. He was pretty good at it already, allowing them to get done with everything fast. "Alright, so I'm going to braid my bread. What you do is you cut your dough into three equal pieces, then make them into long shapes." Ivan sliced the dough in three, doing as he'd instructed. "Then, you mush the three pieces together at the top so they stay together. Then, you just braid it as you would braid hair." Ivan made quick work of it, finishing the braid quickly and efficiently. "Then, you glaze it with some egg, and put it in the oven." Ivan put his in the oven before returning to Alfred. "Try it."

Alfred nodded and quickly cut the pieces evenly, rolling them into long snake looking rolls. He pressed them together at the top, then began to braid. He, too, finished easily, showing it to Ivan. "Very good. Now put egg on it." Alfred took the brush from Ivan, dipping it in egg before brushing it evenly over the soon to be bread. He put it in the oven with Ivan's. "There, all done!" Ivan and Alfred smiled at each other. "Good. Let's clean up, then we can go and dance some, alright?" Alfred nodded, the two gathering their dirty dishes and putting them in the sink, cleaning them properly before drying them and putting them away.

As they walked to the living room, Alfred hesitated. "I don't know if I'm awake enough to do this. I'm still really tired." Ivan nodded some. "We don't have to, then. Would you like to do something else?" Alfred nodded a bit. "Want to play a board game?" Ivan shrugged. "Sure. Sorry sound good?" Alfred nodded and Ivan went to get it from his difficult closet. He came back and set the box on the ground. "I need to get a refill on my coffee, I'll be right back." He walked to the kitchen, taking his mug from the counter and filling it with the warm black liquid. He took a few swallows, then went back to the living room, sitting across from Alfred who had already set everything up. "I call red!" Alfred looked to Ivan as he claimed his color. "Alright, I'll be blue. Hey, don't you think it's kinda ironic you're from Russia and you chose red?" Ivan said nothing, just took the first turn. Alfred frowned a bit; he hadn't meant to offend him.

Alfred took his turn, then Ivan, and so on and so forth until they were nearing the end of the game. "It appears as though I'm winning." Alfred looked up to Ivan as he spoke. "Yeah, looks like it. Just like you won poker the other night." The two couldn't help but grin a bit to themselves, blush tinting their cheeks a warm pink.

After a few minutes, Alfred was crowned the winner, Ivan ruffling his hair. "Good job. You really pulled through on that." Alfred smiled happily. "Yeah! I totally kicked your ass, Ivan!" Ivan scoffed. "Let's play again!" And for the rest of the afternoon, they played Sorry, making silly remarks and laughing at each other's stories, the room filled with the wondrous, warm feeling of companionship.

**Notes: **Sorry this chapter is short, I was lacking the time and amount of sleep required to write my normal stuff. Thanks for reading!


	9. Breathe Me

**A/N:** Due to the incredibly large amount of time I now suddenly have on my hands for the next three days, I'll be writing a bit more. Hopefully I'll be able to get some more candles. Also, I've received a few requests for smut, which I'll try to spread out throughout the chapters. There'll be a warning at the beginning of the chapter, as well. This chapter has warnings for language. I don't own Hetalia, and I own none of the music used in this chapter.

Alfred's work week had gone by fast, his deliveries had started to dwindle some. He supposed it was just because he had done so many deliveries last week that it just wasn't necessary for him to deliver a bunch of stuff every day. In fact, one of the days he only had one delivery and he helped Ludwig with some of his work instead. So when Saturday rolled around, Alfred was just in a better mood than the rest of the week, and that was saying something.

Alfred woke up earlier than Ivan, walking to the kitchen and starting the coffee pot per usual. He decided he'd surprise Ivan with breakfast in bed. He washed his hands, then walked to the fridge, pulling out a few eggs and a tomato, along with some sausage and onion; Ivan had taught him how to make eggs a while back, so he half knew what he was doing. He got out a pan from its usual place, setting it on the stove. He opened the package of sausage, putting it into the pan and turning the stove on medium-high. He grabbed a spatula from a little container next to the stove, turning back to the sausage and starting to break it into pieces. The sizzle of the pan and the familiar smell of browning meat was very desirable to his stomach, and it began to growl profusely.

Alfred turned the heat down some, getting a liquid measuring cup from the cupboard and bringing it down to the counter. He broke the eggs into the cup, throwing the shells in the garbage. He then got out a cutting board, setting the onion on it before grabbing a knife. Alfred had never cut an onion, but he assumed it would be pretty easy. He peeled off some of the yellow dry skin, tossing that into the garbage with the shells. He hesitantly set the blade's edge on the onion, his other hand holding the vegetable so that it wouldn't roll about. He pushed down into the onion, making a successful cut. He nodded a bit, noting that it wasn't actually that bad. He cut it a few more times, the slices minute pieces coming off.

"Maybe one more." Alfred put the knife onto the onion again, pressing down as he had been doing before. This time, the knife didn't go into the onion, but instead wobbled and went into Alfred's finger. He dropped the knife, wincing as the knife cut a little gash into his finger. "Fucking thing…" He went to the sink and ran his finger under the water, which was now pooling in the bottom of the sink, slightly tined red. Alfred made a face and put some soap in the other hand and began to scrub his hands together, hissing as the soap found the cut. He washed it anyways, then went to the bathroom and found a band aid. He wrapped it around his finger, then returned to the kitchen, not being deterred by the incident. He chopped up the pieces of onion he'd cut off, being far more careful this time. He dumped those chunks into the egg, taking a fork from the drawer and mixing them together, breaking the yolks to produce a pretty orange color around the whitish-green of the onion. He then returned to the sausage, mixing it about the pan to make sure it didn't stick.

He quickly cut up a bit of the tomato, putting that in with the egg mix as well. He stirred everything together once more, just for good measure, then took the cup over to the pan, pouring its contents over the sausage. The egg made a wonderful sizzling sound, the air carrying the sound and smell around the house. Alfred moved it around the pan, making sure the egg was properly cooked before cutting it in quarters. He grabbed a bag of shredded cheddar cheese from the fridge, sprinkling it onto two of the pieces. He let it melt a bit, then flipped the other piece onto it, letting them melt into each other. He got down a plate, setting it next to the pan. After a few moments, he picked the pan up by the handle, flipping the one of the omelets onto the plate with his spatula. He grabbed a banana from a bowl on the counter near the sink, peeling it and cutting it into pieces. He placed that on the plate next to the omelet-type thing and poured some orange juice into a cup.

Alfred picked up the plate, the cup already in his hand as he walked down the hall to the bedroom once more. By now it was about the time that Ivan woke up, which was good timing. Alfred set the plate and cup on the bedside table, turning to Ivan. He shook his shoulder gently, smiling at him despite the fact he was asleep. "Ivaaaaaaan. Breakfast!" his voice was soft, but excited. He'd made everything by himself.

Ivan's eyes opened slowly, looking up to Alfred with a little smile. "Breakfast? It's only eight." Alfred shrugged, grinning. "I made you breakfast this morning." Ivan smiled up brightly at Alfred, rubbing at his eyes to remove the sleep. "All by yourself? I'm so impressed!" He sat up and pulled Alfred into a light hug. Alfred couldn't stop the smile that had sprung onto his face, stretching from ear to ear. He hugged Ivan back tightly, then gestured to the plate. "Oh, crap! I forgot the fork!" Alfred stood up and ran to the kitchen, getting a fork and power walking back to the room, handing it to Ivan. "Here you go." Ivan smiled and pecked Alfred's cheek. "Thank you." He cut off a piece of the egg, stabbed it with his for, and then placed it in his mouth. His eyes closed and he made a sound of appreciation. "Alfred, this is delicious." Alfred lit up even more, if that was possible, doing something of a happy dance. "Yay! I'm so glad you liked it!" Ivan laughed softly.

"Where's your breakfast, Alfred?" Alfred jerked his head towards the kitchen. "I left it in the pan to stay warm." Ivan smiled a bit more. "Why don't you go dish up and come eat with me?" Alfred nodded and went to the kitchen, putting his eggs on a plate and grabbing a fork. He walked back to the room, sitting on his side of the bed. Alfred took a bite, smiling; he didn't mean to brag, or anything, but it was pretty damn delicious. He began to think about what else he could add next time, but was interrupted mid thought. "What happened to your finger?" Alfred blushed. "O-oh. I accidentally cut myself when I was trying to cut the onion up." Ivan frowned some. "Ouch. But you still made this for us? You're so sweet." Ivan smiled at Alfred in thanks, causing Alfred to blush even more.

The two continued eating, savoring the flavor of Alfred's cooking. "Did you add a little milk to the egg mixture, Alfred?" Alfred groaned. "No. I forgot that part." Ivan grinned. "It's alright. These are great any-" Ivan was cut off by Alfred's cellphone ringing at him. He frowned and looked at the caller ID, seeing it was Ludwig. "I have to take this really fast, sorry." He smiled at Ivan apologetically, sliding his thumb across the screen. "Hello?" Alfred couldn't help but wonder what Ludwig wanted at eight fifteen in the morning. "Guutan tag, Alfred. I have some… bad news." Alfred set his fork down on his plate. "What's wrong, Luddy?" There was a pause, then, "I'm sorry Alfred, but I have to lay you off." Alfred bristled, eyes getting wide suddenly. "We just haven't really had business like we used to, and we had to let Gilbert go last week, too. I'm very sorry." Alfred wasn't sure what to say at this point. "N-no, it's fine. Don't worry about it." Ludwig hung up, leaving Alfred with his phone to his ear, his expression indifferent.

"Alfred?" Ivan had set down his plate as well, looking to Alfred. "What's wrong?" Alfred smiled a bit, hiding his panic. "Just got laid off." Ivan frowned, pulling Alfred into a giant hug. "Well, fuck them. They're losing a good employee. I'll help you find something new, alright?" Alfred nodded dumbly, closing his eyes. He wanted to just go back to sleep and stay in that state until next year; however, that wasn't an option. Alfred sighed and tried to finish his breakfast, leaving bits on his plate here and there.

"Alfred, what would you like to do today?" Ivan attempted to lighten the room's mood, which had changed drastically in the matter of a few seconds. "We have a lot of other stuff we could cook, or I could teach you some more dance technique, or…" Alfred shrugged, standing with his plate. "It doesn't really matter to me." Ivan sighed, frowning. "Let's make some brownies today, then. We'll figure out something after that, alright?" Alfred nodded again, smiling a tiny bit. Ivan stood and brought his dishes to the kitchen, putting them in the sink. He ran them under the water, then put them in the dishwasher. While he had a dishwasher, he didn't use it unless it was everyday cups and plates. He preferred to wash all his cooking utensils.

"Alright then. Brownies." Ivan went to the cupboard, taking out the recipe book. He flipped through until he found the brownie recipe. He looked to Alfred, the boy standing in the middle of the kitchen, hands behind his back as he stared at the floor. Ivan sighed softly, dropping his gaze back to the book, getting ingredients from around the kitchen and bringing them back to the counter. After a moment, he looked at Alfred again; he was in the same position as he last was. Ivan decided to break the silence and ask something. The day couldn't really get worse anyways, could it? "Alfred, how do you feel about me?"

Alfred's head snapped up, wide eyes staring at Ivan's back. There was a silence in the room; Ivan could feel his heart sinking down into the pit of his stomach. "I…" Alfred wasn't sure he could put his feelings into words. "It's fine, Alfred. Let's just make these, okay?" Ivan couldn't hide the disappointment in his voice as Alfred didn't respond. He mixed the cocoa powder in with everything, his own mood dampened slightly. He poured the mixture into a Pammed pan, putting it in the oven. As he turned away from the oven, Alfred wrapped his arms around him, squeezing him tightly.

"I don't know how to put my expressions into words, Ivan. I can't tell you that I like you a lot, because that's not enough. I just… I dunno." Alfred buried his face into Ivan's chest, listening to his heart beat which seemed to have sped up since he first grabbed him. "I-I guess what I'm trying to say, is that I kinda-sorta-maybe-probably… L-love you?" Ivan's eyes widened, his arms tightened around Alfred as the words tumbled from his lips. Ivan's eyes closed as he held Alfred close to him, inhaling his sweet scent. "I love you too." His voice was soft as he spoke, though it was certain. He felt his cheeks warm, the blush spreading from his cheeks to the tips of his ears.

The two stood in the middle of the kitchen, the warm smell of brownies filling the air as they hugged. Finally, the two let go of each other as the oven timer went off. Ivan took the mitts from next to the stove, slipping them on and getting the pan out of the oven. "They smell good, da?" Alfred smiled and nodded. Ivan went got some chocolate chips out of a drawer, both white chocolate and milk chocolate. He took a pot from the cupboard, filling it with water and then setting it on the stove. He grabbed a bowl and put all the chocolate chips into it. "Alright, so if you boil the water and put the bowl in here, then it'll melt the chocolate without burning it." Alfred nodded, watching closely. Soon enough, the chocolate melted, the colors swirling together.

"Okay, so now we can put it over the brownies, and when it sets, they'll be extra chocolaty." Alfred made a sound of approval. "That sounds so delicious!" He giggled, hugging Ivan's back as Ivan poured the chocolate on the fresh-out-of-the-oven brownies, smiling and putting the bowl into the sink once all the chocolate was out. "I'm so excited to eat those." Ivan laughed at Alfred's statement. "They're good. But for now, we should do something to pass the time." Alfred thought a moment. "Hmm. Why don't we just kinda hang out until then?" Ivan shrugged then nodded. "Sure." Alfred smiled and wrapped his arms around Ivan's neck, giving him a soft kiss to his lips before trailing gentle kisses down his neck.

"Do you really mean it?" Ivan looked down to Alfred. "Mean what?" Alfred looked up at Ivan under his eyelashes. "That you love me? Do you really mean it?" Ivan nodded some at Alfred's words. "Of course I do. I would not go around kicking that phrase at you if I did not mean it." Alfred giggled softly, cuddling into Ivan. "And you promise you'll help me find a job?" Ivan nodded. "Of course." There was a small silence. "Can we just eat the brownies out of the pan right now and watch tv?" Alfred looked up to Ivan again. "Oh, sure!" Ivan let go of Alfred, grabbing the now cool pan from the stove, grabbing two spoons and shoving them into the brownies. He got down two glasses and filled them full of milk; you just cannot have brownies without milk. He returned to Alfred who had already settled on a station. "Here." He handed him a glass of milk, sitting down next to him and setting the pan in Alfred's Lap. Alfred took a bite, smiling. "This is so good!" He took a giant bite, some of the chocolate running down the corner of his mouth. Ivan looked over and grinned, reaching over and taking the chocolate off his face. "So messy." Alfred laughed. "Hey, this is fucking delicious, dude. I'll be a pig if I want to!" The commercial played Too Close in the background, setting a feel-good mood for the two, their tragic morning completely past them. "I promise, everything will get even better from here, then. I already have a plan, podsolnukh." And with that, they focused their attention on their brownies and the television, enjoying some silly sitcom that normally wouldn't mean anything to them.

**Translations: **

Da—Yes

Podsolnukh—Sunflower


	10. Cold

**A/N:** I don't know who you are, or what you do with your life, but the person who views my chapters five minutes after I put them up: You're totally amazing. I was up pretty late last night trying to get chapter nine done, and as soon as I posted it, I got two views within five minutes. Thanks for reading my work! This chapter has warning for small amounts of language, and mentions of disturbing images. I don't own Hetalia still.

"Francis, I need to talk to you for a sec." Ivan tugged at his scarf, following Francis around the shop as he busily set everything up for the day. "It cannot wait?" Ivan shook his head at Francis's question. "It is a very quick question, Francis, I just need to talk to you." Francis huffed, turning around with a little feather duster in his hand. "Alright, you've got twelve seconds to ask this question, got it?" Ivan nodded a bit. "Starting now." Ivan used up one of his seconds trying to think of how to start this. "Ah, alright. So I was wondering if maybe you'd be willing to hire another person to work here. They can get half of my pay, and I'm sure he's willing to work the days I don't, Francis. Please?" Francis stared at Ivan a moment, sizing up his expression a moment. "Alfred lost his job?"

Ivan blinked. "Y-yeah. On Saturday." Francis sighed, face sympathetic. "Well, I tell you what, mon cher. I'll hire him here. You can keep your regular pay, I'll start by paying him half of what you get. Sales have been so good lately that I heard one of the other floral shops in town is going to shut down!" A bell sounded from the front counter, and they turned their attention to a young woman who was holding a few things. "Let Alfred know he starts tomorrow, and he works the same days and time as you." Francis walked to the counter, his smile flashing bright white as he took the items from the woman, ringing them up and asking if she wanted cash back in his usual charming way.

Ivan's grin was far larger, its intention not to be charming, but to simply convey his excitement. "Thanks Francis!" Francis waved at him from behind the register, smiling a bit broader now. Ivan went about working as normal, making sure the displays were set up properly and that they weren't dirty. Once he was finished with that, he decided to make a few new displays for the front window. He went into the back, selecting a purple vase and taking purple tulips from the refrigerator. He grabbed some red ones for good taste, then talked back out to the arranging table. He put some water in the vase, then began to put the long stems of the tulips into the opening, mixing reds with purples to make a nice arrangement. Once everything was how he wanted it to be, he took some red ribbon and wrapped it around the curve of the vase, tying a pretty bow.

Despite the fact it his shift was up, Ivan continued to arrange a few more displays, Francis watching from his station at the counter. "Add some roses to that—it'll take on a different mood than what it's conveying right now." Ivan tilted his head to look at it, and then nodded a bit. He walked to the back room, taking a few roses from a bunch and bringing them back out. He put them in among the other flowers, the display indeed taking on a different tone than it had before. "That looks really good, actually." Francis smiled and nodded. "Oui, I think so." He stretched tiredly, yawning. "Ivan, I have a date tonight, so try to wrap it up, please." Francis's words were obviously meant to be kind, so Ivan took them that way despite the fact that he hadn't sounded too gently with his words. "Sure thing."

Ivan finished up his last arrangement, looking over the roses once more before putting it in the display case. "Alright, I'm finished." He took his apron off, tossing it to Francis who stowed it quickly behind the front desk. "Have a good evening, Francis. Hopefully your date goes well." Francis nodded his thanks, raising his hand to wave. Ivan walked out of the store, putting his hands in his pocket as he made his way home. His eyes stayed glued to the pavement as he walked, watching as the street lamps threw his shadow from his feet all the way out in front of him. Soon enough, he made it home, pulling his keycard out and swiping it. Today, the light turned red for five tries until finally, on his sixth try, the light blinked up at him, the green being projected onto Ivan's face.

He pushed the door open, closing it behind him before heading up the stairs. He got to his apartment, feeling too lazy to actually get his key out of his pocket. He knocked on the door, knowing Alfred was home. However, after a whole minute, there was no response. Ivan frowned, knocking again. Still nothing. He sighed worriedly, taking the key out of his wallet before opening the door. He walked into the living room to see no sign of him. "Alfred?" His voice echoed through the apartment. He walked to their bedroom, his eyes finding a lump in the blankets. He walked forward and gently tugged the blankets back, mind filled with relief as he saw Alfred fast asleep, mouth slightly open. Ivan laughed softly, kissing his forehead before standing back up and going back out to the living room. It was only five, but he was pretty hungry. He decided to just grab a bag of salad from the fridge and throw some lemon on it.

He put everything on a plate, grabbing a fork as he ate his dinner standing at the kitchen counter in silence. He liked the lemon he'd squeezed over the greens—it gave it a nice tang. Before he'd completely finished his dinner, he heard footsteps behind him. He turned to face a very sleepy looking Alfred who rubbed his eyes as he walked, almost bumping into Ivan. Ivan laughed softly, pulling him into a hug. "Good morning sleeping beauty." Alfred scoffed. "Beauty? Not right now. I had the worst flipping nightmare ever, dude. I can't even bring myself to draw it, it's too scary." Ivan frowned. "What was it, Alfred?" There was a moment of silence. " ." Ivan's eyebrows rose. He knew what that was, but he wasn't sure how Alfred had come across it. "Did you get it in an email?" Alfred shook his head. "I saw it online on a YouTube video." Ivan nodded some. "In that case, you are just kinda scared of it still. You know it's not real, so try to focus on the good things. Like, being employed."

Alfred's droopy eyes opened wide suddenly. "Employed? You found a job?" Ivan nodded. "And, the even better part is that was work at the same time, the same days." Alfred's tired face lit up as he smiled at Ivan. "No way! You got me a job at the flower shop?" It appeared to Ivan everyone could just read his mind today. "Yes, you'll be working there with me. Francis was kind enough to hire you on the spot when I told him you had lost your job." Alfred suddenly became far more awake, smiling broadly. "No way! I'll have to give him a great big hug at work tomorrow!" Ivan smiled and nodded some. "Indeed. Now you best be off to bed, Alfred. If you're having nightmares, you'll need all the sleep you can get." Alfred shook his head, body beginning to tremble. "You don't understand, Ivan! It's horrifying! There's no way I can sleep when that damn thing is haunting me like that!" Ivan sighed. It was only five fifteen, but he couldn't mind some sleep. "Come on, we'll both go to sleep, then." Alfred nodded hesitantly before they walked to their room, Ivan removing his coat before lying in bed. "Come on. You'll be fine." Alfred bit his lip, still rather mortified. He didn't want to go to bed, he just wanted to die. That thing was flipping creepy. However, he clambered into bed reluctantly, snuggling up to Ivan timidly. "What if it comes back?" Alfred's voice was a whisper. "Then you wake me up and tell me, and we will get it to go away. Alright?" Ivan smiled at the very scared Alfred. Alfred nodded, then quickly drifted off into sleep.

Despite the reassurance Ivan had given him, the image came back to haunt him in his dreams. Not too long after he'd fallen asleep, he woke back up, body shaking violently as a cold sweat covered his body. Ivan was awake already, looking to Alfred in concern. It was only 6:17; the two could tell it was going to be a long night.

-**ooo**-

Alfred and Ivan got to work a bit early the next morning. Neither had been able to sleep; Alfred due to his nightmares, and Ivan due to Alfred. Alfred's nightmares had gradually gotten better throughout the night, the demonic image slowly beginning to fade from his mind. He couldn't remember what it looked like now, but it still scared him badly.

Francis looked at them from behind the counter, noting their tired faces. "Quel est le problème?" Ivan looked to Francis, frowning. " ." Francis seemed to know what that was, seeing as he shivered and shut his eyes, taking a second of silence to think of what to say. Then, "I assume that it was Alfred who stumbled upon it this time?" Alfred nodded. "How are you feeling?" Francis was going into therapist mode again. "Tired and scared. My head hurts a bit, but that's just from the lack of sleep." Francis nodded. "Alright, that's good. You'll be fine, Alfred. I promise you. It's really just a nightmare, and the whole thing isn't real, so you don't need to worry about it. It was an image that was made using Photoshop a long time ago, alright? I swear, you'll be fine. Just focus on other things, like your fine coworker over there." Francis made something of a wink to go along with the pass he made at Ivan. Alfred felt a pang of jealousy, but covered it quickly. "Right!" He grabbed Ivan's arm, practically clinging to the tired man.

Ivan smiled weakly. "See? I told you that it's fake." Alfred nodded, feeling a bit better now that two people had told him the same information. "Yeah, I guess." There was a beat of silence, then, "Can you show me what we do here?" Francis looked to Ivan. "I think Ivan will be able to show you what to do." His words were now directed at Ivan. "Go ahead and have him clean the shop up, then you can work on arrangements for a bit. Your sunflower arrangements go out the door like crazy, Ivan." Ivan smiled at Francis, nodding a bit. "They're my favorite, so that's good." All three nodded, standing around awkwardly before Ivan decided it was about time he showed Alfred how to do stuff around the shop.

Ivan handed Alfred a Lysol wipe, asking him to go around and clean the tables off. As Alfred did so, the returned to Ivan, who had grabbed some sunflowers, a vase, and some little glittery leaves, working on an arrangement. Once he was finished, he smiled to Alfred. "What do you think?" Alfred smiled brightly despite his sleepiness. "I really like it. I think it looks good." Ivan blushed a bit, smiling. "Thank you. I'm very glad you think so." Francis walked over, interrupting the conversation. "I forgot to ask you, how did your stay-at-home date go, guys?" Ivan and Alfred looked at each other, grinning awkwardly and blushing to the tips of their ears. "It was… g-good. Yeah." Ivan nodded at his own words, rubbing the back of his neck. Alfred laughed softly. "Actually, it was fantastic. Thank you for the flowers and roses, Francis. It was kind of you." Francis smiled at Alfred somewhat knowingly. "Oui mon ami. It was my pleasure." Alfred hugged Francis, taking him off guard. "And thank you for hiring me." France nodded, his arms out at his sides as he was hugged. "Of course, mon cher." Alfred returned to Ivan's side, looking up to him with a smile.

"It's actually just about time for you guys to get going." Ivan looked at the clock on the wall, seeing that it was indeed near the time their shift ended. "Alright. We'll do one arrangement together, then head home." Francis nodded in approval. "Sure thing."

Ivan and Alfred headed to the back. "Pick out some flowers you'd like to arrange." Alfred nodded and took a few of multiple kinds, all of which were the same shades of pink and cream. Ivan looked at the colors then picked out a transparent vase, filling it part way with water from the sink, then motioning for Alfred to follow him out to the arranging table. They set the vase down, as well as the flowers. "Alright, so just put the flowers in one by one until you feel that you really like it." Alfred nodded, looking at his flowers. He picked up a few cream-colored flowers, setting them in the vase and putting a few pink ones around them. He continued the process until the vase was full of flowers. "That looks gorgeous, Alfred." Ivan took some pink ribbon from under the table, wrapping it around the mouth of the vase and tying a cute bow. "There. All done?" Alfred smiled. "Yeah, done." The two took the vase to the front and set it in the display case. "Lovely. I'm sure someone will buy it tonight or tomorrow." He smiled lovingly at Alfred, getting the same look in return.

"All right, lovebirds. Get out of my shop." All three of them laughed as Ivan and Alfred took off their aprons, putting them under the front counter. "See you around Francis." They walked down the street and took a left, making their way back home. Alfred reached over and took Ivan's hand, not really caring if people saw. Since it was still December, the light from the sun was already fading, being replaced by an even chillier darkness. Ivan gave Alfred's hand a gentle squeeze, smiling over at him.

Finally, they got home and Ivan took his card out of his pocket, getting the light to blink green at him on his first try. They went inside and headed up the stairs to their apartment, making it to the door and unlocking it. Ivan took off his coat and locked the door once they were inside. "So, how was your first day at work?" Ivan looked to Alfred. "It was really great. I'm so glad I get to work with you, Ivan." Alfred's cheeks were bright pink from the cold, which Ivan found terribly adorable. He leaned down and kissed him softly, smiling. "We really need to go to bed and make up for last night's sleep that we missed." Alfred nodded in concurrence, walking behind Ivan as they made it to their bedroom. They both flopped down on their bed, sighing comfortably. There was a moment where neither of them spoke, the blissful silence beckoning their minds into sleep. Alfred broke the silence after a few minutes.

"Ivan, are we dating?" The odd question made Ivan's lips curve into a smile. "Ah, I suppose so." They hadn't really discussed it before, making the current conversation rather awkward. Nonetheless, Alfred grinned and rolled over to snuggle into Ivan, kissing his neck. "I was hoping for that answer."

**Translations:**

Mon Cher—My dear

Da—Yes

Podsolnukh—Sunflower

Mon ami—My friend

Oui—Yes

Quel est le problem—What's wrong?

**NOTE: For those of you wondering what is, it is an image that has circulated the internet of a demonic looking dog with a hand in the picture. The picture has been modified on the internet due to the original image causing people to go insane and commit suicide. I wouldn't recommend looking at the picture if you are easily scared, are superstitious, or if you're about to go to bed. It has been said that it gives terrible nightmares, so view the image at your own risk.**


	11. Lovers' Eyes

**A/N:** There's FRAUK in this chapter. I warn you now. I have a new update schedule—you can find it on my profile. Warnings in this chapter are for FRAUK. Sorry, this chapter is kinda short. I don't own Hetalia, but I do own a pair of pants.

"That'll be $12.50 please." Francis took his customer's money, smiling at her. He scanned the front of the store, looking for Ivan to have him run the register for a bit. He didn't find Ivan, or Alfred for that matter. He had a date with a certain someone, and he didn't want to look bad when he got there. Once his customer had walked from the counter, he decided to check the back room. Before he entered the room, he heard giggles and whispers from inside. He peeked inside, watching as Ivan set down an armful of sunflowers and roses down on a table. He unwrapped the scarf from his neck, putting it around a shivering Alfred. Francis leaned in a bit more to listen to their conversation.

"Are you going to be alright back here?"

"Yeah, of course. It's just really cold 'n stuff."

"Would you like my coat, Alfred?"

"No, not right now. If I get any colder, though, I'll need it."

There was a pause, then Ivan took his coat off, slinging it around Alfred's shoulders. Both were blushing a bit. "Are you sure you don't need this?" Ivan nodded. "Of course. I grew up in Russia—I'm used to very cold temperatures." They smiled at each other, then Ivan spoke up again. "Alright, we need to get this done before Francis finds out. We have about an hour to get this done, according to my phone." Francis looked over and saw his phone sitting next to the flowers. However, instead of going in and talking to his employees, he decided he'd leave them be to do whatever project they were trying to get done before he knew.

Francis returned to the front counter, helping a young man pick out a bouquet of flowers for his girlfriend. Meanwhile, Ivan and Alfred picked out a vase and began a great big arrangement, adding all sorts of flowers to it. They based the colors around pink, red, and cream, adding a few yellows—the main colors the customer had requested. They put a bow around the mouth of the vase and stood back to look at it. "Alright, I think we're done. That only took forty five minutes." They grinned at each other and Ivan stole a happy kiss from Alfred. "Da, it looks great, podsolnukh." They heard the jingling of the doorbell as the door was swung open. Alfred peaked his head out of the room, watching as Francis looked up from his work. Francis grinned brightly, tugging his apron off and walking to meet Arthur in front of it.

"Ready to go?" Arthur smiled at Francis, who smiled ecstatically and nodded. "Of course, cher!" They smiled at each other. "Alright, well I need to make a call really fast. That alright?" Francis nodded again, watching Arthur pull his phone out of his pocket as he hit a number on his speed dial. "Bring it out." Francis made a face, something of a confused grin. However, he turned his attention to the back room where Arthur was looking. Alfred walked out of the room with a huge vase of flowers, smiling some; he was still wearing Ivan's scarf and coat. Ivan hung back, leaning against the door and playing with his scarf as he watched the scene. Francis lit up and giggled. "So this is what you were hiding from me. It's gorgeous!" Alfred did something of a bow, smiling and waving a bit at his father before turning and going back to the door to stand with Ivan. "Alright, now we can go." Francis blushed and kissed Arthur's cheek, nodding. "Sure thing." Arthur walked to the door and held it open for Francis, who was still smiling and giggling some; and with that, they were gone from the store.

Ivan give Alfred a high five, smiling. "Well, that went really well. Nicely done, Alfred." They both went to the front counter, Ivan running the register and Alfred working on organizing some of the stuff near it. Ivan rang a few people up, and Alfred would help them get what they needed from the display cases. After an hour of work, Francis came back in as good of a mood as he'd been in when he left.

"Bonjour! I see you took good care of the store while I was gone." The two nodded and smiled. "Thank you, I really appreciate it. And the flowers… They were just the icing on the cake. Merci." He hugged them both, smiling broadly. When he pulled back from hugging them, he grabbed his apron and put it back on. "I'll take the register for a while. You two can work on arrangements." Ivan nodded and went to the back room, looking at their selection of flowers. Alfred followed him, hugging him from behind and peeking over his shoulder. "What kind of flowers are you going to use?" Alfred moved his gaze to Ivan's face. "I was thinking I could use orange roses. I actually really like those, and sunflowers. So I'll use those." Alfred nodded, and Ivan turned to face him smiling at him. "You look good in that scarf."

Alfred blushed; he'd completely forgotten he'd been wearing it. He looked down and took it off, wrapping it around Ivan's neck once more. "Keep the coat on. It's a little chilly in here still." Alfred nodded, not in the mood to argue. He smiled at Ivan a bit, blushing still. "How adorable." Ivan brushed his cold fingers against Alfred's cheeks, grinning a bit. "Alright, come on, we have work to be done." And with that, they began to work on their newest arrangement.

**Translations:**

Da—Yes

Podsolnukh—Sunflower

Bonjour—Hello

Merci—Thank you


	12. White Blank Page

**A/N:** Hi guys, I'm officially on spring break! Whoo! I'll probably still stick to my schedule, but I might not post Thursday, 3/21. I'll be taking a trip to my favorite place in the whole world, and we're staying the night. Thanks for reading!

Ivan and Alfred woke on Friday morning to find themselves tangled in each other's limbs. The blond boy stretched some, causing Ivan to move about a bit, as well. They opened their eyes to look at each other, Alfred only having one eye open as he stared at Ivan's lavender eyes. They just laid there for a few minutes, emotionless. After a moment, Alfred whispered a small phrase in such a manner that the words didn't seem to fit in the scenario. Normally, in this situation, they'd mutter little nothings to each other. However, odd words fell from Alfred's lips, wrapping themselves around Ivan's brain and confusing him slightly. "Staring contest. Ready go." Ivan raised his eyebrows, but kept his eyes open none the less, staring at an unblinking Alfred, until finally, he couldn't stand the burn anymore.

Ivan blinked, his eyes watering as they received blissful tears. Alfred smiled, his voice soft, "I win." It was indeed out of place for them to do something so random in the morning, but it was what happened that fine Friday morning. They laid about the bed a few moments longer, Ivan rubbing his eyes as Alfred watched. Then, finally, they both got up and dressed as they always did.

"You want coffee?" Ivan pulled his shirt on, grabbing his scarf. "Oh, sure." Alfred tugged his pants up his legs, buttoning them. "I'll go start it." Ivan, fully dressed, walked down the hall torpidly. He hit the power button on the coffee pot as he had so many times before. He rolled his shoulders, eyes closing. After a moment, there was a weight pressing against his arm, wrapping itself around his middle. He looked down to see Alfred, snuggling into his side, his shirt on inside out.

"I see you are attempting to set a new fashion trend, podsolnukh." Ivan stroked Alfred hair, the blond offsetting his skin tone. Alfred looked up at him in a state of tired confusion. "Wha?" Ivan laughed and tugged on the tag that stuck off of the back of his neck. Alfred grumbled and pulled away from Ivan, blushing as he tugged his shirt off in the middle of the kitchen, turning it right side out. "There. Happy?" Ivan nodded silently, turning his attention to the window. The sun was casting warm shadows about, giving off the impression it would be a nice day.

"Why don't we go out for a walk today, Ivan?" Alfred rubbed his eyes. "Da, that sounds nice." They looked at each other with little smiles, looking away as the coffee maker beeped at them. Ivan got down two mugs, pouring coffee into each cup, then grabbing the creamer from the fridge, handing it to Alfred. He took his own cup and drank a bit, the hot coffee burning his tongue brutally. He winced and swallowed the black liquid quickly, letting some saliva cover the tip of his tongue, feeling oddly cool.

"Let's leave as soon as we finish coffee." Alfred nodded in response. "Sure thing." They sat in silence, sipping their coffee. Ivan continued to stare out the window, Alfred looked down at his feet when he wasn't drinking his warm beverage. It wasn't an awkward silence, really. It was a comfortable, sleepy silence.

Soon, the two finished their drinks and began to get ready to go. It was still rather chilly, so each put on a lightly jacket, hopefully keeping all the cold air at bay. Ivan nodded to Alfred. "Ready to head out?" Alfred nodded in response, putting his white coffee mug in the sink, filling it half way with water and swishing it around the cup. He stared down at the swirling water a second before dumping everything out, the dirtied water fleeing down the drain.

He set the mug down and watched as Ivan repeated the process with his red mug. The water rushed down the sink once more and the small clinking noise of the mug coming in contact with the sink echoed softly around the room.

"Alright, let's head out." Ivan walked to the door, Alfred behind him. They opened the door and walked out, closing it behind them. Ivan locked the door, and they were on their way. They walked lethargically down the stairs, the windows casting shadows of the railing on the far wall. Once they reached the ground floor, they walked to the main door, tugging it open as per usual. They stepped outside, pulling the door shut behind them.

"Where did you want to walk?" Alfred shrugged to answer his question. In his opinion, he couldn't care less as long as he was outside on such a lovely day.

"I don't know. Anywhere, I guess." Alfred took Ivan's hand and started walking down the sidewalk in the vague direction of a park. "It's really nice out today, I think." There was a pause. "Da, really nice." Ivan yawned, giving Alfred's hand a squeeze. Their pace was slow, something more of a stroll than a walk. Ivan's scarf was occasionally lifted by a very slight breeze that made itself known every few minutes. The two didn't mind, really. The breeze was warm, almost welcoming.

The weather was actually quite confusing. It had been snowing the day before, and now it was in the mid-sixties. The change certainly wasn't usual, but it was definitely welcomed.

Alfred stuck his other hand in his pocket, looking about before he spotted a kitty. They weren't but a couple blocks from the apartment when he saw it. "Kitty!" He let go of Ivan's hand, walking over to it. The cat plopped down on its rear end, staring up at Alfred contently. It had begun to purr when Alfred reached down to pat its head.

"What's your name, little guy?" He reached down to feel for a collar, but there wasn't one. That was very uncommon in this area, especially since the area was so populated that cats ran away rather frequently.

Alfred stood back up, smiling as it mewed at him, standing to rub against his denim-clad shins. Alfred laughed, looking back to Ivan. "He's friendly." Ivan grinned and nodded some, watching the kitty weave in and out of Alfred's legs.

"Alright, kitty. I have to leave. We're going on a walk. It was nice meeting you." Alfred walked back to Ivan, smiling at him. Ivan's gaze, however, was diverted to the ground near his feet. He didn't have to look to know it was the cat, for he could feel the fuzzy little thing rubbing against his leg again.

"Let's just keep walking." Alfred took Ivan's hand once more, walking at their same slow pace, a little meow coming from behind them occasionally. After a few minutes, Alfred turned his head to see the gray kitten following them happily, its purring audible from a few feet away, even with the city noise surrounding them.

"He must really like us, da?" Ivan had turned his head by now, as well. They slowed to a stop, the kitten padding up to them and rubbing against their legs, batting at the long end of Ivan's scarf. The two looked down at the kitten, who looked back up at them in return.

"Why don't we back towards home to see if he goes back to his own place?" Ivan nodded, liking the idea. "Sure." Alfred stooped to pet the kitty as they began to walk the other way, the cat beginning to follow them at a little trot.

"Imagine if he was wearing a bell collar. That would be the cutest thing ever." Ivan laughed at Alfred's remark, smiling at him. "Indeed." They continued to walk back in the opposite direction, but even as they passed the area where the kitty had been found, the furry animal continued to follow them.

They returned home, the cat still in tow. Alfred frowned. "What the heck, little guy. You were supposed to go home." The kitten just purred and wrapped around their legs, meowing occasionally.

"What do we do with him?" Alfred looked to Ivan, unsure. "Well, I guess we can hold him in the apartment and put up some found signs." Alfred nodded, liking the idea. "Sure. Let's do that."

They walked into the complex, Alfred picking up the gray fuzzy thing in his arms and carrying him up the stairs. The cat's head bobbed with each stair, his eyes taking the place in as he was transported. Soon, they got up to their apartment and Ivan unlocked the door, opening it for Alfred to go first.

Alfred walked in, setting the kitty down, which ran about happily before jumping onto the couch and rolling onto its back, looking at them upside down. Ivan raised his eyebrows, obviously amused. Alfred had something of a similar reactions, only a little laugh escaped his lips, causing the cat to emit a small meow, followed by loud purring.

Ivan got his laptop from next to the bedside table in their room, then returned to the living room, sitting on the couch next to the cat. His weight caused the cat to roll to the side of his leg, laying there on its back once more.

Ivan grinned a bit, starting up the writing software on his computer and starting a found poster. He added the basic things he knew about the cat, such as its color, its size, and the fact it was a loudmouthed cat. When he finished, he printed fifteen copies and grabbed his stapler.

"Will you watch this thing while I go put these things up? I'll be back soon, maybe half an hour tops." Alfred nodded a bit, walking to pet the cat gently. Ivan waved a bit, then walked out the door.

-**ooo**-

Alfred's mouth hung open, a trail of drool falling from the corner of his mouth. The cat was snuggled into his side, purring in its sleep. Ivan smiled, kissing Alfred's forehead and gently petting the cat's head. He had put up all the posters around town, and was hoping they'd find the cat's owner. It was indeed a cute cat, and he didn't want it to get lost without an owner.

He himself was feeling pretty tired at the moment, however, so he went to the bedroom and flopped down onto the bed, falling asleep with a leg hanging off the bed, shoes still on. They would sort this whole cat thing out later, when he could think properly. For now, though, he would just sleep and not worry about anything but the far and few sunflowers that were wilting in his dream gardens.

**Translations:**

Da—Yes

Podsolnukh—Sunflower


	13. Hold You In My Arms

There was something licking his face, leaving trails of warm slobber all over his cheeks and nose. And whatever was licking him, had an extremely rough nose, almost painfully so. Ivan's eyes opened, trying to look down to this cheek where the fuzzy, warm, and cuddly kitten was licking away at his skin. The cat resembled something of a chicken the way it was holding itself, its back legs appeared to be large hills.

Ivan smiled, reaching up to pet the furry head of the kitten. It couldn't be much more than a few months old, the way it had random little hairs sticking up all over. He hoisted it up into his arms and sat up slowly, rubbing it behind its ears. The kitten closed its eyes and meowed softly at him, leaning into his fingers.

Smiling and chuckling softly, Ivan looked up at the door where Alfred was standing, a little grin on his face. Ivan smiled at him, scooting back in the bed so that his back was resting against the "You know, that thing's been at our house for a week and a half; no one has claimed him." Ivan knew where this was going.

"What's your point, Alfred?" He didn't mean to sound cold towards him, but he didn't want to talk about this. Alfred frowned. "Well, I was just wondering if we could keep him." Ivan didn't say anything in response, he just frowned and continued to pet the cat. "Well?" Alfred was anxious for an answer.

Ivan thought a moment, weighing the pros and cons of his answers. Finally, he looked up to Alfred. "I…no." Alfred pouted. "What? But why?" Ivan set the kitty down, watching as it ran out of the room and into their laundry room. "Because, the neighbors below us a floor are allergic, and I don't want them complaining. Also, it's a giant responsibility. I don't think we can handle that."

Alfred felt so angry. They had been taking care of the cat for over a week already, and neither of those things had been a problem. "That's not fair! What else are we going to do with it?" Alfred fought to keep his voice down, feeling his cheeks heating.

"We'll give it to the shelter, and they'll find a home for it." Alfred shook his head. "No! Absolutely not! I won't let you do that! That's so stupid!" Alfred shook his head and walked out of the room, slamming the door behind him. "I hate you!" The shout was muffled by the closed door. Ivan sighed and leaned his head against the wall, making a little thump. He thought Alfred was being stupid about the whole thing. It was just a kitten.

There was another slam from the front of the apartment, which Ivan assumed was the door. Ivan jumped out of bed, running to the front door. He looked down to see Alfred's phone on the ground, laying on its face. He suddenly felt horribly worried.

He grabbed his phone and his keys, running out the door and locking it behind him. Instead of actually walking down the stairs, he sat on the railing, sliding down quickly. Surely Alfred wasn't too far out the door; he had only taken a minute to grab all of his things.

Alfred was already running from the building, though. He was at least a few blocks away from the apartment already, going in the same direction as he and Ivan had the other day. He didn't care if Ivan was following him—it's not like Ivan would know where he was going anyways. He just kept running until he got to the park. Once he was in the middle of it, he slowed to a walk, lungs scolding him for running. He stopped his movements, looking down at the ground as hot tears filled his eyes.

He felt terrible for the kitty. It would have to go to some horrible shelter and live its poor little life there. Alfred sat in the middle of the walkway, cross-legged and slumped, just crying. He couldn't help but be sad; this adorable little cat he'd been living with for a little over a week would be leaving him for somewhere terrible.

Alfred wiped his eyes on the back of his hands, looking up to see a phone booth. He stood from his odd sitting spot and walked to it. He dug in his pocket as he walked, finding two quarters. Once he reached the blue structure, he put his quarters in the slot, then dialed a number.

He picked up on the first ring. "Hello?" Kiku's voice was almost a relief to hear. "Kiku? It's Alfred." His own voice was shaky with his sorrow, but he didn't really care. There was a moment of hesitation before Kiku responded.

"Hello, Alfred. You sound very distressed. Are you alright?" Alfred looked to his shoes, scuffing one with the other. "I got in a fight with the guy I was staying with and I left to get some fresh air. I was wondering if I could just come get the rest of my stuff. That way I'd have something with me." Alfred could almost hear the nod on the other end of the line. "Of course." Alfred smiled, seeing some hope in the near future. "Thanks dude. I'll be there in twenty." He hung up and gathered himself. Before he left, he swore he could have heard someone yelling his name off in the distance.

That person happened to be Ivan, who had actually gone in the opposite direction as Alfred had, and was just now circling around the area to see if he could find him. At this point, he knew he wouldn't find Alfred. It was too dark to find him, and he was angry to boot. He wouldn't answer to Ivan.

Ivan ran into the park, looking around frantically for his…boyfriend? Was Alfred his boyfriend? They hadn't discussed it before this whole incident. He didn't know at this point, everything seemed to fall apart. All this mishap over a cat.

Alfred reached Kiku's house in fifteen minutes, out of breath from running. He knocked timidly on the door, feeling suddenly awkward. Kiku answered the door, his appearance very relaxed. "Hello, Alfred. Come in." Kiku stepped back, letting a slightly sweaty Alfred in. "Thank you." He looked around his old apartment, sighing slightly. He went to what used to be his, noticed how neatly all of his stuff had been stacked, almost as though Kiku had been expecting this.

He went to the closet, with still had some of his stuff in it, including a suitcase and two duffle bags. He took those and began to place his things in them, pushing them down to fit as much as he could into each container.

He could feel Kiku looming at the doorway, just watching him silently. Alfred felt horrible all around, really. He was being a bit childish with the whole cat thing, but it was a serious matter to him. He felt bad about invading Kiku's space. He finished packing, then slung a bag over each shoulder, taking the suitcase's handle in his grasp. He turned to Kiku and bowed as well as he could with so much weight hanging off him. "Arigato gozaimasu." Kiku frowned a bit, then nodded, moving out of the way of the door, letting Alfred pass him and leave the house.

Alfred wasn't really sure what to do now. He supposed he could just go to a hotel, or something. That was probably his best bet, however, he had to walk in the general vicinity of Ivan's place to get to any hotels. This was one of the very few times when he hated the fact Ivan lived close to everything. He decided it would be worth the risk, though. He'd rather chance Ivan seeing him than sleep in the park.

He began to walk in that direction, the bags weighing heavily on his shoulders. He made it past Ivan's complex, then kept walking. Suddenly, a voice rang out from behind him. "Want some help?" The voice was familiar, but he couldn't place it without actually looking. He turned to find Francis looked at him, frowning deeply.

"Alfred, what are you doing out this late? And with so much stuff?" Alfred sighed, shaking his head. "I just got the rest of my stuff from my old place. I was just leaving." Francis frowned. "Ivan's apartment is back that way, cher." Alfred nodded. "I realize."

Francis crossed his arms, looking at Alfred with concern, though Alfred couldn't see that. "What's going on between you two? You seemed very happy at work yesterday." Alfred shook his head, setting his duffle bags down. "We're just in a bit of a fight right now, and I don't want to talk to him."

"Tsc. That's a silly reason not to go home. What are you fighting about, cher? Certainly it's not as bad as you think it is." Alfred crossed his arms as well, pouting a bit. "Ivan won't let us keep the kitty we found week before last, even though no one has claimed it."

There was a small laugh that came from Francis, echoing softly about the street. "I see. Why won't he let you keep it?" Alfred wasted no time in responding. "He said that the neighbor is allergic, and that it's a big responsibility, and we're not ready for it." Francis nodded understandingly. "Oui, I understand now. Well, it is definitely a big responsibility. It's almost like having a kid, you know. Cats can also be very obnoxious, so it's even more difficult. As for the whole neighbor thing, I don't know what to tell you; I don't know your neighbors at all, but I'm sure they wouldn't mind."

Alfred nodded. "Alright. I kinda guess I see where Ivan was coming from. But he said he was going to give the kitten to the shelter and have them get it a home. That's not fair! He has a home here, and I want him to keep it!"

Francis smiled at Alfred's determination. "I see. Well, how about this? Let's both go back to your apartment and work things out. Alright? We'll figure this out, and you two can go back to being copains, and it will all be great." Francis smiled kindly at Alfred, watching him nod a bit. "Now, give me one of your bags, those must be heavy."

Alfred handed over one of his bags, then slung the other over his own shoulder, with was actually sore from holding the bag up before. They began to make their way back to the apartment. When they got there, Francis pulled his phone out and dialed Ivan's number.

"Bonjour, mon ami. Will you let us up?" There was a pause. "You'll see" Alfred supposed Ivan was wondering who "us" was. Francis hung up, and a few seconds later, the door opened to a scarfless Ivan, looking worried. When he saw Alfred, he sighed and relief and picked Alfred up in his arms, glad he was back.

"Where were you, Alfred? I went looking for you and I couldn't find you, and you scared me half to death and oh dear god, I am just do glad you are back." Alfred gasped for breath as he was squeezed tightly, though he didn't return any affection as he was still angry. France smiled. "Why don't we head upstairs so Alfred can set this stuff down, I'm sure his shoulders are killing him." Ivan nodded and took the suitcase from Alfred, walking up the stairs. The other two followed him up, everyone walking inside together, the kitten trotting to the door to greet them.

They set everything down near the door, Ivan closing it behind them and locking it. "How did you come across Alfred, Francis?" Ivan's question was placed in something of a thankful tone. Francis shrugged. "I was walking to a friend's house and I saw a guy carrying really heavy looking bags, so I offered to help him. It turned out to be this little trouble maker." Francis mock punched Alfred's shoulder.

"I see. Well, thank you very much, Francis." Ivan blushed the tiniest bit, making Alfred's heart melt slightly, his anger decreasing a bit. "Of course, cher. Now, about this little argument that started this whole thing. I assume this is the little kitty?" Francis picked up the cat that was rubbing against his legs, purring and meowing quietly.

"Yes, this is the cat." Alfred looked at Francis, who was smiling at the cat. "How cute. Well, I think you should proba—" Francis was cut off by Ivan. "I've decided to keep him. He proved to me he was going to be a good cat. Alfred I…I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to seem cold and frigid towards you." Ivan scratched the back of his head, sighing softly. Francis put the cat down.

Alfred grinned a bit. "No, I'm sorry. I was really childish to storm off like that, and to just up and leave." Both of them were blushing and looking at the floor, and Francis was standing between them, looking out the window contently.

"See, that wasn't so hard. Now, I must be leaving. I'm sure my friend is wondering where I am." Francis waved and left, not even bothering to look behind him.

Ivan looked up a bit, just enough to look at Alfred's face. The pretty pink tint was still there, and it just made Alfred even more adorable. He timidly stepped forward to wrap the blond in his arms. "I'm really sorry." Alfred returned the affection this time, his arms moving around Ivan's middle. "Me too." The cat rubbed against their legs, purring and meowing contently.

"Hey Ivan?" Alfred looked up to Ivan. "Yes?" Alfred was almost scared to ask the question he'd been wondering for a few minutes. "Are we actually dating?" The question hadn't ever come up before, despite they'd spoken of their feeling for the other before. There was a moment of thoughtful silence. "I do not know, actually. Did you want us to be dating?" Alfred shrugged and nodded slightly. "Kinda-sorta-maybe-yes." Ivan laughed. "Da. We are."

Francis's statement about them being boyfriends was actually legitimate now, which, for some reason, made Alfred feel a lot better. "Let's go to bed. I'm sleepy." Ivan nodded in concurrence, and they went to the bedroom, both of them removing their shirts and falling into the bed, snuggling together, both of them glad the argument was over.

The kitten strode in and hopped up onto the bed, walking all over their legs and meowing loudly. It took a few minutes, but the cat finally got the memo it was time for sleep, and it curled up in a ball between their bodies, purring softly for once. Alfred couldn't help but smile, knowing that cat had a good home with them.

**Translations:**

Arigato gozaimasu—Thank you very much

Cher—Dear

Copain—Boyfriend

Bonjour mon ami—Hello, my friend.

Da—Yes


	14. Safety Dance

**A/N:** I'M BACK. SUP. This A/N is kinda long-ish, so feel free to scroll down.

Ok guys. So, some of you are complaining about how childish Alfred was in the last chapter. Yes, I realize he was really childish about the whole situation (not to mention it was over a cat), but I did that for a reason. He can _sometimes_ be very mature about things (such as when he was thanking Kiku), but when he doesn't like something, he tends to react childishly. I.e. he pouts, or storms off, or something of the sort. Also, due to the fact that Alfred feels so strongly about this topic, he acted a bit more strongly than what might have been necessary. He didn't want the cat to go and get murdered in a shelter.

I didn't give a location for them. Let's just say they're somewhere in Washington state, which is where Seattle is. Seattle is huge. Just saying.

Thanks to Blaubeermuffin for the Cat name idea. Though, the cat won't be involved in the next few chapters.

Also, thank you to HF for the French correction! I'm mostly using a translator, so I appreciate all the help I can get!

These next few chapters are going to be really short kinda cliff hanger things. Please, don't be mad! :C I have to go back to school on Monday, since break's over. So while I make up all of my homework, and try to make sure I can keep my grades up, my chapters will be short. Thanks for sticking with me, guys. I appreciate all of your support!

**This chapter has warnings for things being implied, and for some FrUk and GerIta.**

"Yeah, the cat's super cute and stuff, Luddy. He's just so adorable. We don't have a name for him yet, though." Alfred switched the phone from his hand to his shoulder and cheek. "Name him Mohrle. A lot of black and grey cats in Germany are named that."

"Really? Alright. I'll clear it with Ivan and see if he likes it too. He's just been calling him koshka lately. Russian for cat." There was a little laugh on the other end, followed by a whining. "Hmm. I see. Well, I think I should go. Italy is complaining. Tschüs, Alfred."

"Later." Alfred hung up and rolled off the couch, landing on the ground and just laying there for a minute. He poked at the carpet, perusing the sea of long rope-like strands of carpet fiber. He took a deep breath in, noticing he could no longer smell the sweet cinnamon smell he loved so dearly. He sighed and closed his eyes, his phone still in his hand.

"Alfred, what are you doing?" Ivan leaned against the doorway, looking at Alfred laying on the ground next to the couch. "I dunnoooooooooo." He began to roll about on the floor, arms above his head. "I'm _boreddddd._"

Ivan rolled his eyes then hopped over Alfred, who was still rolling. He sat on the couch, then pulled his legs up onto the couch. "You're bored? Why don't we take a trip then?" Alfred ceased his rolling. "What do you mean?"

"Well, I know you wanted to go to Seattle. It's a really big city, but I think I can get us there." Alfred's lips curved up into a smile. "Yes! Oh my god! That'd be so fucking awesome! Let's go! I'm gonna buy all the fucking things!" Alfred did something resembling a fist pump.

"Ah, right." Ivan laughed softly, smiling down at Alfred. "Let me call Francis and see if we can borrow his car." Ivan stood up and stepped over Alfred to reach for his cell phone. Alfred suddenly grabbed Ivan's ankle, holding onto it tightly as Ivan continued to walk, being dragged along the floor.

"Hey, what are you doing?" Ivan turned and looked down. "Oh, you know. Just chilling out. Being bored." Alfred grinned up at Ivan. "Bored? Why don't you go pack, or something?" Alfred shrugged but didn't release Ivan's leg. "Will you help me pack?" Alfred wondered if he could get Ivan to have some "fun" with him.

Ivan blinked. "What? You can pack, can't you?" Alfred twisted about until he was kneeling. He released Ivan's leg. "I could. Technically. But I'd love some help." Alfred winked, voice suggestive. Ivan finally got what Alfred was hinting at. "A-ah, I need to make that phone call." Ivan blushed.

"Oh, come on! Just for a little while?" Ivan grabbed his phone from the desk and looked at the screen for a moment before putting it on silent. "Come on, then." He pulled Alfred to his feet and walked to their bedroom.

**-ooo-**

"Are you all packed up? Francis is expecting us at his place to pick up the car in half an hour. We should leave in fifteen minutes." Ivan threw a shirt over his head and wrapped his scarf around his neck once more. "Yeah, I just need to grab the last few things."

Ivan had finally cleaned up his room enough to the point where they could actually walk around and open the closet without trouble. Alfred had been able to put his stuff in the closet as well. "Alright." Ivan tossed his phone charger into his bag, along with his coat. He decided he didn't really want to wear it at that point. Seattle would be warm at this point in the year; not to mention it was a long drive. He didn't need the coat on while he drove. It would probably just get in the way.

"Okay, ready!" Alfred picked his bag up from the bed and slung it over his shoulder. The cat followed him out of the room, mewing at him. Ivan nodded. "Got your toothbrush?" Alfred's eyes widened slightly. "Oh! I forgot that!" He ran off into the bathroom, the cat following him still, then came back. "Okay. Got it." Ivan nodded.

"So you have everything now?" Alfred nodded in response. "Alright. Then I guess we're off. Make sure all the lights are off, alright?" Alfred sometimes forgot to turn off all the lights. "I checked already. Twice."

Ivan smiled and kissed Alfred's forehead. "Good job. Alright, let's head out." They walked out their front door and locked it behind them, leaving the cat behind. "So, you excited?" Ivan looked over at Alfred. "Are you kidding me? I'm so fucking excited!" Ivan laughed and took Alfred's hand as they began to walk down the stairs. "Good."

They made it to the end of the staircase and went out the front door, walking down the sidewalk with their hands still interlocked. "So, where are we going to go? And where are we going to stay? And oh my god, can we go to the South Center Mall? And who's watching the cat?" Ivan smiled.

"Francis agreed to watch the koshka. And we'll go wherever you want; I've already booked a hotel. I rather like the internet on my phone." Ivan and Alfred laughed softly. "Cool. I'm excited!"

They eventually got to Francis's house and knocked on the door. After a few seconds, Francis pulled the door. "Bonjour! Here are the keys then, and make sure not to hurt my car, oui?" Ivan laughed some at how hurried Francis seemed. He gave Francis the swipe card and apartment key in return for the car keys. "Da, do not worry about it Francis." Francis laughed and hugged them both quickly. "Au revoir!" And with that, Francis retreated into his home, leaving Alfred and Ivan to head out to the car.

They both threw their bags in the trunk of the sleek black car, then went to their respective sides. Ivan got in the driver seat and buckled up. "Alright then, we're outta here, podsolnukh."

**Translations:**

Koshka—Cat

Tschüs—Goodbye

Oui—Yes

Bonjour—Hello

Da—Yes

Au revoir—Goodbye

Podsolnukh—Sunflower


	15. Lights

**A/N:** Okay. Hi guys. c: Today only has warnings for some cursing. Surely you're all used to that by now, though. I don't own any music, and I certainly don't own Google. xD

The freeway was slightly crowded due to the time of day. It was the morning rush hour when people were hurrying to commute places. Not that Ivan minded much; despite the crowded roads, he was enjoying himself. "So have you ever been to Seattle, Alfred?" He could see a nod from the corner of his eye.

"Yeah, but I was pretty young. I think I was eight, actually. My parents took me to the aquarium because I was really obsessed with sea animals." Ivan laughed softly. "I see. The aquarium is really nice, actually. I went there when I was fourteen with my grandparents. We had just moved to the states and they wanted us to get a bit better acquainted with where we were living. I liked the seahorses because they were the coolest looking."

Ivan did a head check before pulling onto the freeway. He settled into the seat, getting used to the seventy miles per hour they were now traveling. "That's cool. The aquarium and the zoo were my favorite places when I was eight." The two laughed softly and Ivan changed lanes.

"So what are we doing first?" Alfred couldn't help but be excited. He bounced around in his seat, looking over at Ivan. He tilted his head, realizing that Ivan looked pretty damn good driving right then. Not that he didn't always look good, of course; it was just that Ivan was driving with one hand while wearing sunglasses like a total sexy badass.

"Well, I figured we'd head to the hotel first. Drop our stuff off." He kept his eyes forward on the road. "Then we'll probably head to Bellevue Square Mall. It'll be dark by the time we get there anyways, so we can't really go anywhere." Ivan looked over to Alfred, who—for some reason—was staring at him like he was something out of the ordinary.

"O-oh, sure." Alfred's voice was smaller than normal. He could feel his face warming with a blush. He turned and looked out the window to where the cars in front of them continued to move along, and the road curved.

Ivan leaned into the turn, grinning slightly as he saw the Alfred's normally porcelain face acquire a lovely pink tone. "You're adorable." He reached over with the hand he wasn't using to steer and took Alfred's hand, eyes staying on the black asphalt ahead of them.

Alfred's blush just deepened as his hand was taken in Ivan's. "U-uh, thanks?" He laughed and smiled, looking out the window. He looked out, watching as the trees whizzed past them at an almost alarming speed. He reached out and turned the radio up, letting the sound fill the car.

"_But some kind of madness is swallowing me whole. Yeah I have finally seen the light, and I have finally realized what you mean. And now I need to know is this real love, or is it just madness keeping us afloat? And when I look back at all the crazy fights we had, like some kind of madness was taking control, yeah._" Muse filled the sleek black car that almost seemed to fit the music with its characteristics.

"This is a really good song. You know, they performed on SNL the other day? They were so good." Alfred rambled some over the music, his thumb stroking Ivan's hand absentmindedly as he did so. "That show is so good. Muse should perform more often. Them and Justin Timberlake."

"I do not think I've ever watched SNL. What is it?" Ivan actually didn't really even watch television all the much. He just figured he could spend his time doing other things.

"What? You've never watched SNL? Oh my god, Ivan, what are you doing with your life?" The question was supposed to be lighthearted, and he hoped Ivan took it that way. "SNL is like, the best show ever. It's fucking hilarious. They have improv skits and it's just so awesome! And they have musical guests, like Muse and Bon Iver, and JT."

Ivan was obviously amused, as his eyebrows were raised up behind his bangs. "SNL. Alright, I'll watch it sometime. I'm sure we can find it on tonight, seeing as it is Saturday." Ivan didn't mind giving it a shot. It sounded like it might actually be fairly interesting.

"Totally!" Alfred smiled at Ivan, the blush finally absent from his skin. "I'm so fucking excited. Like, not even kidding. I haven't been on a trip in forever." He laughed some and readjusted himself so he was sitting differently in his seat. He tucked one leg up under the other, still grasping Ivan's hand.

"Well, only fifty miles left, podsolnukh." Ivan smiled at Alfred's excitement, giving his hand a squeeze as Alfred huffed at how large the distance was still. "All in good time."

**-ooo**-

The streets were just as busy as the freeway had been. The lights were a gorgeous contrast against the black night as they slowly made their way through the Bellevue traffic, the air warm enough for them to open the sunroof and roll down their windows. The sounds of a large city mingled in with the radio station, which was playing some Lady Gaga song which neither Ivan nor Alfred cared much for.

"Alfred, will you read the directions in the glove box from 'turn right on 345th street'?" Ivan looked around the area. He remembered the street names well enough from when he'd been looking around on Google Maps, but he couldn't remember whether it was a right or a left turn on Lincoln Avenue.

"Uh…" He looked down the list. "Ah. Here we are; turn left on Lincoln Avenue, then arrive at destination on right." He looked at the name of the hotel. _Hyatt Regency Bellevue. Book price: $203._ "Damn Ivan, expensive much?"

Ivan shrugged, obviously unconcerned. "Nothing compared to the Hilton. That was $320." He readjusted his hands on the steering wheel, stretching a bit. He made a smooth left turn.

"I thought you were saving up for a car?" There was an awkward pause in which Alfred just stared at Ivan, but it ended, causing Alfred to change the subject. "Well, it's kickass anyways. There's a fucking swimming pool. Unf." The little noise me made at the end of the sentence made Ivan laugh softly, glancing at Alfred.

"What, you like swimming pools, or something? There's a hot tub too, if I remember correctly." Ivan laughed louder at Alfred's delighted little sound he made in response. "Looks like I picked the right place, then." He turned into the hotel parking lot, picking a space near the front door and parking. He turned the key back towards him and pulled it out after closing the windows and sunroof.

They both hopped out at the same time, stretching and walking to the trunk simultaneously. Ivan opened it and let Alfred grab his bag first. Once they both had their stuff, Ivan took Alfred's hand and led him inside.

"Do you think that's such a good idea? I mean, what if people…judge?" Alfred blushed lightly at his insecurity. "N-not that it matters, or anything." He looked away at the ground as Ivan stopped walking and let go of his hand, a small smile still on his face.

"If you don't want me to, I won't. It's just a habit, is all." He smiled gently at Alfred, who blushed even darker. "N-no! It's not that, I was just… I dunno." He sighed and looked down. Ivan reached back to rub the back of his neck. When his hand met the skin of his neck he jumped.

"Where's my scarf?" His mutter was quiet, but Alfred still heard it; he laughed softly. "You threw it in your bag, dear." Alfred took Ivan's hand in his after the little awkward moment that had happened. "And…I was just being stupid. Sorry."

Ivan recovered from his confusion instantly as Alfred took his hand again. "No, it's totally understandable. Some people are total fags." His smile didn't match his harsh words at all. "It's understandable to feel insecure in this kind of situation." He gave Alfred's hand a reassuring squeeze.

"Kay. I just feel kinda stupid for even worrying about what other people think. Honestly, it doesn't matter." He threw his typical confident smile at Ivan and started to walk into the hotel, Ivan in his tow. He stopped in front of the reception desk.

"Ah, I have a reservation under Ivan Braginski." The receptionist smiled warmly at him, twirling a strand of his hair about his index finger. "Sure thing!" He did a few things on the computer and double checked a few things with Ivan, then handed them two cards. "Room 320, third floor." He smiled sweetly, then as they began to walk away, he called out, "You two are a really cute couple!"

Ivan and Alfred exchanged grins before Alfred smiled and waved at the receptionist. "Thanks!" Alfred blushed again, looking at the floor for a second before he looked around for the elevator, pushing his glasses up. Ivan had already spotted the bay of them, though, and they were on course for them.

They walked into the little container-like room, and Alfred hit the little button with a "3" on it, causing it to light up green. The door slid shut and they began their ascension. Ivan smiled at Alfred and kissed his forehead, causing the shorter blond man to blush again. Ivan brushed his fingers gently against his boyfriend's warm cheek, his cold fingers a startling difference from Alfred's cheek.

The elevator emitted something like a ding and the door slid open. Ivan took Alfred's hand and walked out of the elevator, turning left to get to their room. They walked for a minute or two until they finally reached the room. Ivan slid the card through the reader like he did every day of his life, the light turning green and allowing them access to the room.

The two peered into the darkness, and then Ivan stepped inside and flipped a light switch. The warm lighting revealed a large king size bed, and an enormous window that looked over part of Bellevue, the headlights of cars looking like Christmas lights. Alfred grinned and ran into the room, dropping his bag and diving onto the bed.

"It's so fluffy!" He laughed and smiled at Ivan, who laughed at Alfred's behavior. "Good." Ivan set his stuff down as well and looked over at the clock. It was five thirty. "Alright, so to the mall then? We have time to kill before we sleep, podsolnukh." He leaned against the wall and watched as Alfred rolled around on the bed, getting a down feather stuck to his shoulder from the comforter.

"Sure!" Alfred ceased his rolling and stood, brushing himself off. "Are we gonna leave right now?" Ivan shrugged in response. "We can leave whenever you want." Alfred stretched. "Sure, let's leave right now then." Ivan nodded and headed to the door. Alfred eyed Ivan's bag. "Aren't you taking your scarf?"

"Nah. I'll leave it be for now, I think." He grinned a bit mischievously at Alfred before opening the door and holding it for Alfred. Alfred raised his eyebrows in surprise and delight. "I see." As he walked past Ivan in the door he received a swift swat on the ass. He turned and looked at Ivan, grinning before standing outside the door.

Ivan joined him and they walked back to the car, hands entwined as they always seemed to be. They got in their seats again and Ivan drove to the mall according to the directions as he could remember them. They arrived there in seven minutes, and they both got out and grinned at each other over the car.

They walked into the mall and looked around some. It was pretty huge, and they were pretty sure they would get lost. They didn't really mind, though.

They decided to go to Hot Topic first. Alfred liked the shirts there. They found the store on the directory and headed towards it. They could tell when they got close from the loud music. Alfred smiled at Ivan, suddenly feeling a bit self-conscious. "Ah, so don't judge me. The store is a bit… different." Ivan nodded and the two went in.

Ivan took in the black walls filled with t-shirts and bustiers alike. There were tutus on the back wall, and all sorts of CD's on a shelf in the corner. The music was far louder inside than it was in the mall hallway. He didn't really mind it, though; he watched Alfred browse through the shirts, grinning at some of the graphics on a few. He ended up buying a shirt with Nyan Cat on it. The cashier had her hair dyed all different colors, and multiple piercings.

As they walked out, they decided to head to Abercrombie & Fitch. Neither of them really did a lot of shopping in a large mall like this, so they just figured they'd enjoy it to the fullest. They walked down the way a bit until they saw the shirtless models outside the store.

Ivan didn't so much as glance at them, but Alfred sneaked a little peak at the models' abs. They walked in and looked at the neat tables in the lowly lit room. The air smelled strongly of the same cologne that Alfred wore typically. Ivan decided upon a pair of jeans, and Alfred on two. They bought the clothes and headed back out, the intoxicating smell of cologne still wafting about them—Alfred especially.

**Translations:**

Podsolnukh—Sunflower

Okay, so this is cut off. I'm sorry! It's 3:30 in the morning and I have school tomorrow, and I just need to sleep. I promise I'll pick up where I left off.

Also, warning for the next chapter: THERE IS SMUT. I'm warning you now.


	16. Something

A/N: Long ass note warning. Feel free to scroll.

Hi guys. I'm sorry I've kept you all waiting. I've been having some issues with sleep lately, and it's been affecting how I write. Honestly, when I get really tired, I think all my writing is shit, so then I scrap everything, and sometimes, if I'm lucky, Word will ask if I want to recover and when I read it, I'm like, "Wow, this is half decent. If I rewrite the last half, it would be okay." But no. xD My brain seems to hate me a lot, so I'm sorry it's been hindering the story.

This chapter has warnings for smut. (Please don't kill me! (I can't guarantee the quality of it, seeing as I'm running on three hours of sleep, plus whatever sleep I can manage in English class.)) I'll mark it off with the normal little "o's" that I use for sections. There's also a warning for some awkward stuff. I want to thank all of you for staying with me on this story. It's insane to think so many people have actually read my stuff, and it's just the most wonderful feeling in the world. c:

**Where we last left off:** Ivan didn't so much as glance at them, but Alfred sneaked a little peak at the models' abs. They walked in and looked at the neat tables in the lowly lit room. The air smelled strongly of the same cologne that Alfred wore typically. Ivan decided upon a pair of jeans, and Alfred on two. They bought the clothes and headed back out, the intoxicating smell of cologne still wafting about them—Alfred especially.

Both had a bag or more at their sides, both hands occupied whether that be with the stings of the bag, or the other person's hand. The mall was full of high school students who were enjoying their Friday. Ivan and Alfred tried to find their way through the crowd. They'd pretty much given up on finding stores on the directory and were now just walking along to see if they could find anything that seemed interesting to them.

They went into the Sanrio store, not exactly sure what they were doing, but they were there anyways. Ivan gave Alfred an amused look as the blond picked up a hat and put it on, turning around to face Ivan with a hand on his hip, the other behind his head. Ivan laughed at the silly pose and pulled his phone out to snap a picture. Once he'd saved the picture, he placed the phone safely back into his pocket and they continued to look through the store. Ivan decided to get a little pen that had Hello Kitty on the top. It was bright pink, but he figured it'd be worth getting to commemorate their first trip to a Sanrio store. Alfred ended up with the hat he'd posed in, as well as an eraser that was supposed to smell like mocha, but really just smelled like chocolate-type stuff.

Both added a bag to their hands and continued on their way, eventually finding their way through a Hollister, a Nordstrom's, a JCPenny, a Bath and Body works, and somehow managed to get and carry a Starbucks cup with them the whole time, despite the fact it halted their hand holding. The mall eventually thinned out as it got later, and some of the teens were actually shopping, or had gone home. They finally decided upon a place to go for dinner: The Cheesecake Factory. Alfred had been there a million times, but Ivan hadn't had the fortune of visiting even once.

Alfred and Ivan headed back out to the car, putting their stuff in the trunk before getting back in the car and buckling up. Ivan pulled out of the parking spot and found the exit for the parking. He headed in the general direction Alfred told him to go.

"Alright, so the menu is huge and everything is delicious—left turn here—so don't get overwhelmed if you can't make a decision, okay?" Alfred spoke excitedly as he perused the names of the streets, making sure they didn't miss a turn. "And make sure you try their margarita. It's to die for. Right, then it's the second right."

"You do know I'm driving, right?" Ivan glanced at Alfred, smiling some. "But if you have one, I'll take a sip. Otherwise, I'll just have coffee. Is their coffee any good?" Ivan pulled into the parking lot and parked, getting out at the same time as Alfred.

"I dunno, I've never had it." Alfred laughed and smiled, taking Ivan's hand in his as they walked into the restaurant. "And since I _will_ be having a margarita, you can certainly have a sip." He grinned at Ivan, watching as he asked for a table for two. They were handed a little plastic device. "The wait is fifteen minutes. This will light up and vibrate when your table is ready." The waitress smiled at them and they walked off.

They stood off to the side, hands still interlaced as they watched other people move about the building, some of the apron-wearing people rushed about, while others took their time carrying the overly full drinks. Finally, their little pager went off, and they walked back to the waitress and handed her their pager. She smiled and nodded as she deactivated it, then picked up two menus. "Follow me, please." She left her post and lead them to a booth, setting the menus down after the two had sat down.

"Can I start you off with anything to drink?" She looked to Alfred first, who nodded and smiled confidently. "Yes, please. I'll take one of your pomegranate margaritas, please." The lady nodded, wrote it down, and turned to Ivan. "What can I get you?" Ivan looked up and answered with ease. "A cup of coffee, please." The waitress wrote it down, then said, "Right! I'll be right back with those."

Once she'd left, the two flipped their menus open and weighed their options. Ivan had to admit that everything sounded good, but he opted for the four cheese pasta. "You know what you're getting, Alfred?" His companion looked up and smiled, nodding a bit. "Yep! I'm going to get the Fettuccini Alfredo."

The waitress came back and placed a basket of bread on the table, as well as their respective drinks. "Are you ready to order, or do you need more time?" Alfred shook his head. "Nope, I think we've got it." He smiled and the waitress nodded. "Righto. What will you have, sir?" Alfred pointed to his choice in the menu. "The Fettuccini Alfredo, please." The waitress took a second to write it down. "With parmesan?" Alfred nodded and the lady scribbled more stuff down, then turned to Ivan. "What can I get you?" Ivan closed his menu. "The Four Cheese Pasta, please." The waitress nodded and smiled at him. "That's a very good choice. Would you like parmesan?" Ivan nodded a little at the question and the waitress walked away again.

"Ivan! You need to try this before you do anything else!" Alfred pushed the margarita across the table towards him, smiling broadly. "This is the most delicious shit there is!" Ivan laughed and took the transparent straw between his lips, sucking gently until the sweet taste met his tongue. He let the thick liquid fill a small part of his mouth, then stopped. He cocked his head to the side, nodding as he swallowed. "It is very good, actually. I like it." Alfred laughed. "I told you, man!"

Ivan laughed and nodded, taking a piece of break from the basket and cutting it in half, taking the bottom portion of it and biting it. He normally preferred whole wheat bread, but since it was a special occasion, he decided to have some Italian. The taste was foreign, but not unwelcomed. He liked the taste of both, it was just that the wheat was better for him.

"So, what do you think of Seattle so far, Alfred?" He looked across the table at the blond, who was nibbling on a piece of bread. "Did you have other stores you wanted to visit?"

"I fucking love Seattle! It's so wonderful!" He made flopping gestures with his hands, supposedly indicating that he was excited. "I think it's gorgeous, and even though it's crowded, it's awesome! And I think I want to go to the Guitar Center store. Just to look." Alfred nodded.

"Guitar center? Do you play?" Alfred shrugged. "A little. Not since senior year of high school, so it's been a few years." Ivan smiled. "I didn't know that! That is so cool." He blushed a bit and smiled at Alfred, rubbing the back of his neck. Alfred laughed softly. "I'm not that great, but I'll try to play for you, I guess."

The waitress put a halt to their conversation with their food. She set them down in front of them, then grated fresh parmesan over their dishes. "Hopefully, these will be satisfactory. Enjoy!" She smiled and walked away, leaving the two to eat.

Ivan picked up his fork and twirled some pasta around his fork before gracefully sticking it in his mouth. It was indeed delicious, and he could understand why Alfred liked this place. He took a sip of his coffee before taking another bite. Alfred was doing something similar, eating and drinking like Ivan. The table was silent while they ate, though it wasn't an awkward silence, it was just one of those silences that happened when you were starving and there was a plate of food sitting before you.

Finally, when they were done, the waitress came back and Ivan covered the bill after a little squabble with Alfred over it. They headed back out to the car and got in their seats, Alfred holding a box of pasta still. While Ivan pulled out and got back onto the street, headed down the road. "I think I'm going to stop and grab some vodka for tonight, if that's okay." Alfred nodded and they found a grocery store to stop at. They quickly ran in and bought three bottles of whipped cream flavored vodka before going back out to the car. While Ivan pulled out, Alfred discreetly stared at Ivan.

He supposed he just hadn't really taken the time to really appreciate how damn attractive Ivan was. Sure, he'd thought about how badass he looked on the way over, but he didn't voice anything too often. Tonight, however, was different. It might as well have been from the two margaritas that he'd indulged in, but he decided to say something. "Hey, Ivan. Did you know you're really attractive? Like, I'd totally do you." He grinned goofily as Ivan's gaze slipped from the road to Alfred, obviously surprised that had come up.

"U-uh, no. I didn't. Thanks for telling me, Alfred." His tone was awkward and uncertain. Alfred just giggled and rested one of his hands on Ivan's thigh. "Well, now you know. And since I'm very attractive, we may as well be attractive together, you know?" Alfred raised his eyebrows a few times in a suggestive manner, causing Ivan to chuckle. "Ah, sure?" He pulled into the lot of the hotel and parked the car, turning it off and turning to Alfred.

-**ooo-**

Ivan was about to speak when Alfred pressed a warm, firm kiss on his lips, a smile playing between the two of them. Ivan kissed Alfred back after he'd gotten over the initial shock of the kiss, a hand finding its way into Alfred's hair. One of Alfred's hands found one of Ivan's, and held it. For a moment, they stayed like that, holding hands and kissing in the car. Finally, Ivan pulled back and grinned slightly, a little blush on his face from the kiss. "We really ought to get inside." Alfred nodded in concurrence, both of them unbuckling and getting out of the car, the pasta and bags forgotten as they hastily made their way to the front doors.

They passed the receptionist from earlier, who was flipping through a magazine and didn't seem to notice them. They reached the elevator and hit the up button. When it finally arrived, the two got in and watched as the door closed. Once they were cut off from the prying eyes of the other patrons, Alfred slipped his hands up Ivan's shirt, his cool fingers making Ivan shiver slightly as Alfred kissed and nipped at his neck. He was interrupted by the elevator slowing down and the door opening. Alfred removed his hands and blushed, laughing a bit as they headed towards their hotel room.

Ivan fished for the keycard in his pocket and pulled it out, trying it in the door. After five tries and no luck, Alfred snatched it from his hand and swiped it through, getting it to turn green. They pushed through the door, and once it was closed, Ivan removed Alfred's shirt, kissing him as he tossed the fabric off to the side. Alfred mimicked Ivan, removing his shirt and tossing it to the side. He pulled Ivan back onto their bed; he leaned back until he was laying, Ivan looming over him. Alfred grinned and laughed softly, looking up at Ivan before kissing him again, his hands on either side of Ivan's head. Ivan gently parted his lips, gently tapping his tongue against Alfred's bottom lip.

Alfred smiled and parted his lips, running his hands from Ivan's jawline down his neck and both shoulders, running the tips of his fingers slowly down Ivan's shirtless chest until they came to rest at the top of Ivan's pants. He mused his fingers about Ivan's hips, feeling the warm triangle that extended down into his pants and getting a quiet gasp from Ivan. He let his tongue mingle with Ivan's, the fingers of his left hand beginning to play with the button of Ivan's pants until the button popped out of its hole. He gently nipped at Ivan's lower lip teasingly, feeling that those pants were a bit tight.

Ivan didn't care much for a slow approach at this point. Once Alfred had unbuttoned his pants, his own hands slid down Alfred's body to fumble with the button, obviously not as sexy as Alfred's doings, but the same action, and the same response nonetheless. He rather liked the little moan of approval he got from Alfred as he slowed his pace a bit, tugging the zipper down slow enough to almost be considered teasing. He gently began to tug down Alfred's pants, kissing his thigh gently before pulling them all the way off.

He hooked his fingers into the band of Alfred's boxers, tugging them down slowly, giving him a seductive grin as he did so. Once he'd removed the offending fabric, he tugged off his own and attempted to crawl on top of Alfred. The blond managed to flip him over, though, leaving Ivan surprised and on his back.

Alfred dragged his fingers down Ivan's chest, grinning down at him as he took Ivan's cock in his hand, giving the Russian a kiss as he began to work his hand. He began to kiss down Ivan's chest, kissing each of his hips, then taking Ivan's length into his mouth, smiling and looking up at him when Ivan gasped and groaned. Alfred began to raise and lower his head with a light rhythm, hands resting on Ivan's thighs. The Russian carded his hands though Alfred's hair, content moans escaping his lips regularly.

Ivan gently pulled Alfred off his dick and pulled him up on top of him again, brushing his thumb against Alfred's bottom lip. Alfred laughed softly and held onto Ivan's hand, taking his fingers into his mouth and sucking on them gently. Ivan kissed his forehead then reached down behind Alfred, letting a single finger slip into Alfred's ass. The muscles there pressed against his finger momentarily until Alfred relaxed with a little shudder, hands on Ivan's chest. Ivan began to work his finger in and out of Alfred slowly, then without warning slipped in a second finger, getting a moan from Alfred. He brushed a lock of gold from Alfred's face, watching his face contort in pleasure. He slipped a third finger into Alfred, watching as the boy bit his lip.

Ivan finally pulled his fingers out, getting a disappointed whimper from the boy above him. Ivan sat up and flipped Alfred onto his back, kissing him gently. "Ready?" All he got for an answer was a small, excited nod. With that, he pressed the head of his cock against Alfred's hole, grunting softly as he pressed himself into his boyfriend, who cried out softly, arms wrapping around Ivan's neck. Once Ivan felt his hips press flush against Alfred's, he leaned down and kissed Alfred, giving him a second to adjust. When Alfred nodded he began to move, his actions slow and gentle. He nipped at Alfred's neck, Alfred's soft mewls that filled the room were music to Ivan's ears, making him move faster.

He held onto Alfred's hips, steadying himself. He kept his eyes on Alfred's face, long eyelashes resting on the bit of skin right under his eyes, his mouth open as he panted. Ivan groaned softly, feeling he wouldn't last much longer, the moans Alfred emitted made him guess he wouldn't have to. His assumptions proved correct as Alfred gasped, his fists tightly gripping the sheets below him as he shot his cum onto their stomachs. Ivan follow him seconds later, hips stuttering against his boyfriend's, releasing his load into Alfred with a quiet shout, muffled in the boy's shoulder.

Ivan gasped for air, gently pressing a kiss to Alfred's shoulder before falling off to one side, laying on his side, looking at Alfred. He grinned breathily, getting a winded laugh in return. He pulled his boyfriend closer and whispered an 'I love you' before falling asleep, Alfred following in suit not seconds later.

**Note:** Holy shit, that's smut. xD I don't write that often, so I'm sorry if it's badly written.


	17. Pulse

**A/N:** I'll be doing some "research" to figure out how to write all the "funsies" soon. I swear. ^-^" Again, I'm super sorry. Make sure to read the updated version of chapter 16. It'll make more sense, despite the lack of "good stuff."

"What the fuck are you doing up at seven in the morning? That's like…" Alfred did the math. "Four hours of sleep." He rubbed his eyes to remove the sleep.

"I really could ask you the same. You're awake too, after all." Ivan held a cup of black coffee in his left hand a grin on his face. "That means you only got four hours of sleep, too." He observed the steam that rose from the black beverage. "Aren't you tired too?"

Alfred shrugged as he stood from the bed. "Not particularly. I actually feel pretty awake. I tend to feel more awake after less sleep than average sleeping time." He stretched and walked to the coffee pot, taking a mug and pouring himself a cup, adding two of the little containers of French Vanilla creamer and swirling it around.

"I've noticed the same thing about myself, actually, especially after a night of drinking. Honestly, I think whipped cream flavored vodka is my new favorite beverage." He chuckled and took a sip of his coffee, burning his tongue and causing him to wince minutely.

Alfred laughed softly. "I'll admit, that stuff is pretty damn good. Even _I_ like that stuff, and I normally hate vodka." He grinned at Ivan, taking a sip of the scalding hot coffee.

"Really now? That's interesting." Ivan sat back in his chair, expression thoughtful. "I'll keep that in mind for future reference, then." He winked at Alfred, sending memories of the night before spinning around the blond's mind. He laughed a little, smiling and nodding as he felt a blush overcome the normally pale features.

"Y-yeah." Ivan laughed at his boyfriend's reaction, taking another drink of his coffee.

"So, what shall we do today?" Ivan watched as Alfred sat down on the bed across from him and studied him closely.

"I dunno. We could always go to the aquarium or the zoo. Or, we could do some more shopping in downtown Seattle. Or, we could go to the 'Hipster and Applefag Mecca.'" Alfred shrugged and stared at the floor intently for a moment before looking back up.

"Hipster and Applefag Mecca? Sorry, but what's that?" Ivan tried to stifle a laugh as he looked to Alfred's face for an explanation of some sort. When his half-questioning half-amused face got only a little laugh, he cocked his head, questioning Alfred with his body language.

"Sorry, I meant Starbucks." Alfred grinned some. Ivan emitted a small laugh, liking the given name for the popular coffee place. It was actually rather accurate, seeing as most of the college students came in toting an Apple laptop, or something to that effect.

"I see. I guess that makes sense. Ah, but we went there yesterday." He looked down into his coffee. "But we could definitely go to downtown Seattle. They have a bunch of fun stores there. Is that what you'd like to do?" Ivan's question got a nod in response. "Alright, let's get packed up, then."

Both of them drank the rest of their overly hot coffee, probably causing permanent damage to their esophagus. They then stood up and picked the room up some. They dressed, then grabbed their phones and wallets from wherever they'd been tossed the night before. They'd forgotten their shopping bags in the car, so they grabbed their backpacks and walked out of their room, leaving everything as it was when they'd woken up that morning: the sheets askew, pillows on the floor, the vodka bottles scattered about. The only think not a mess were the table and chair in the corner of the room with the phone and directory sitting on it.

They didn't regret it one bit.

They turned their key cards into the same receptionist that had been there the night before, waving a cheery fair well to him as they went to their car. "Alright, Seattle here we come." They clambered into their seats, buckling up as Ivan started the car and pulled out of the parking spot with ease. He drove out of the parking lot, one hand on the wheel, the other on his right leg. Again, Alfred had a feeling of awe, seeing how much he looked like a total badass.

He looked out his window, watching as the cars beside them moved slowly up to the now red light. Had the person in front of them been going faster they probably could have made it through the intersection on a yellow. Sadly, though, said person hadn't, and now they were boxed in by a variety of other cars. Ivan tapped his fingers impatiently against the leather of the steering wheel, watching the cross traffic flow through the intersection. "So, where to first? There's lots of places to go, you know. There has to be at least one place you know of that you want to see."

Alfred did something of a shrug. "I dunno. Like I said, I've never been in Seattle, so I'm kinda unsure of what all is here." He rather liked the city, despite the fact he'd only been here for something like twenty hours, give or take, and most of that time was spent in a hotel room. "We could always just start at Pike's Place and look around there. I know they have some pretty neat stuff there."

He blinked. _Did I just say neat? What the fuck._ He sighed softly and smiled stupidly at Ivan, who just grinned back at him. "Sure thing. I think that's definitely a great place to start." He took his hand off his lap and let it rest gently on Alfred's knee, a smile present on his lips minutes after that last bit of conversation between them. They eventually got to the area of the market, pulling into the parking lot after paying a somewhat hefty fee for just an hour of parking.

"Okay, you have everything you'll need for now? We're just going to look around, I think. Probably'll buy a few things, too." Ivan got out of the car and checked to make sure his wallet was in his pocket. When he found it wasn't, he began to panic. He opened the back door to look there, hoping it was maybe in his backpack. Luckily, it was sitting right there on the seat next to the backpack he'd carelessly tossed in.

Alfred checked his pocket and found his wallet there, giving it a firm pat before getting out of the car to stand next to his boyfriend. "Alright, I'm ready to go when you are." He gave him a loving smile and took his hand, intertwining their fingers as they headed towards the market.

It was definitely a busy place; the streets were crowded and the vendors urged people to take a look at their products, whether that be jewelry or fish. There were a few musicians that stood with a saxophone or a guitar. There was a younger teenage girl with glasses and tight curly hair who played guitar. She stood on the side of the sidewalk, strumming and singing the words to a song Alfred knew. Smiling with recognition, he tugged on Ivan's hand to stop so that they could listen to her for a minute.

"_Can you lie next to her and give her your heart? Your heart? As well as your body, and can you lie next to her and confess your love, your love as well as your folly, and can you kneel before the king, and say 'I'm clean, I'm clean'." _She looked down at her fingers, making sure they were on the right fret. Despite the fact Alfred rather liked popular music, he rather liked Mumford & Sons, as well. When she looked up at them, Alfred gave her a thumbs-up with his free hand, making the girl blush and grin at the ground sheepishly.

When she'd finished the song, Alfred handed her a $5 bill and gave her a giant squeeze (much to Ivan's laughter.) "You sound great. Don't ever stop singing." He gave the speechless girl a smile and then went back to Ivan and took his hand again, walking off and leaving the girl standing there, awkward and confused.

"She was good." Alfred grinned at Ivan. "Yes, she sounded wonderful." The two looked around at the artists that were scattered about, their sketchpads on their lap, a stick of charcoal in the other. They all had gorgeous renditions of the building around them on their pages. They got to the actual market and began the journey through the very small, very claustrophobic area.

There were all kinds of hats and scarves and necklaces and everything of that variety. They both picked a scarf out, buying them and carrying the bags at their sides. "This place is really neat!" Alfred couldn't help but exclaim his happiness. Ivan laughed softly at the enthusiasm his boyfriend showed in the place.

When they'd reached the end, they both had bought a scarf and a tie, then Alfred had bought some sushi and Ivan had got a pack of notecards with sunflowers on them. Satisfied with their purchases, they headed back towards their car. They passed the girl with the guitar, who was then performing a mix of a Damien Rice song and a Bon Iver song. Alfred rather liked it.

They returned to the car, glad nothing had happened to it. However, they'd gone over their hour of available parking; they'd have to pay double on the way out. They put their bags in the trunk—which was very full already—and pulled out of the lot, paying the extra fee for going over.

"Well, it's already 12:30. Are you hungry? We didn't really eat anything this morning." Ivan switched lanes to get out of the busy area. And hopefully to somewhere with food.

"Ah, sure. I like food." He laughed and smiled, looking out the window. "Yeah, let's do that." Ivan's stomach growled in agreement and both of them laughed aloud. "Sounds good to me." Ivan took a left and headed towards a little cluster of restaurants. He parked and they got out, deciding on the one closest to them. They walked in and were seated right away. "Awesome! That was mega fast." Alfred sat in the squishy bench seat, bouncing around on it and grinning.

"Indeed." Ivan laughed and ran a hand through his hair, leaning back in his seat. Alfred stopped bouncing and decided to play footsie under the table instead. He gently tapped Ivan's toe with his, looking away and trying to hide a grin. Ivan raised his eyebrow and tapped Alfred back, surprising Alfred. He hadn't expected Ivan to tap back. Alfred tapped again, grinning right at Ivan now, watching as Ivan's lips curved up slightly more into a full smile. This continued even after the waitress had taken their orders.

When the food arrived, however, they stopped and Alfred dug in. Ivan took his time, though, despite his hunger. He somehow finished his food faster than Alfred though, so he sat and looked out the window while Alfred finished. With the two of them full, Ivan paid the bill and they headed back out to the car, getting ready for their next adventure.

**Note:** I don't own Mumford & Sons, I only listen to and perform their music. Thanks for reading!


	18. Middle Distance Runner

**A/N:** This chapter was written by my friend and I. ALSO, I've done research. Expect the worst. This chapter is a short fluff chapter. (Here you go, leroyalpear. Please don't murder me.)

So things have gotten really hectic for me lately, I've halted A Change in the Weather and Save Me is in the works. I'm super sorry guys. I'll try my best, but stuff just sucks right now.

"Well, fuck. That's not good."

The front of the black car was badly dented, no doubt from someone backing into it. The two sighed. It was still drivable, but it definitely wasn't going to be easy to explain to Francis what had happened. He really loved his car.

"Holy shitballs." Ivan chuckled as lightheartedly as he could at Alfred's language, getting in the car despite the body damage it had acquired. He started the car, and everything seemed to be running smoothly. For now. The drive back to the hotel went smoothly, but Alfred was obviously distressed. "It'll be alright, podsolnukh. He won't be that upset about it."

Alfred did feel a little better at this, but he was still feeling pretty bad about it. They'd have to work extra hours to pay it back. They drove back to their hotel, despite it being the middle of the day. "Well what are we supposed to do now?" Alfred asked coyly as they open the door to their room. "Well we could always do something on the bed." Ivan winked. He pulled Alfred to the bed, and promptly fell dead asleep.

Alfred blinked, laying there next to Ivan. "Well, that was unexpected." Alfred grinned a bit. He was pretty tired too, though, so he closed his eyes and just laid there, hoping sleep would find him. Eventually, it did, and he curled into Ivan, a little smile on his face as he slept.

**-ooo-**

"Nng, what do you think you're doing?" Alfred's eyes remained closed as his lips moved, still asleep. Ivan pulled back from Alfred, a trail of saliva left on Alfred's neck from where he'd started to kiss and lick. Alfred's breathing was still slow and deep, occasionally catching in his throat and letting a soft snore out. Ivan chuckled, wondering what Alfred could possibly be dreaming about.

"I think I'm trying to wake you up." Ivan's murmur was so soft Alfred probably wouldn't have heard it even if he was awake. Ivan moved to straddle Alfred, running his hands up the blond's sides. "Wakey wakey." They'd slept for a few hours, and it was already five. "_Fredkaaaaa._" Ivan's voice was sweet as he tried to rouse him with the Russian name of Alfred's. He continued to kiss and nibble at Alfred's neck, hands stopping at his chest to rest there.

Alfred stirred a bit, his arms moving up around Ivan as if acknowledging his boyfriend's presence. There was a pause as Alfred was dragged from the depths of his sleep, and for all that Ivan knew, a great dream. "Vanya?" Ivan could tell he was still half asleep, but found Alfred's voice too adorable to stop trying to wake him up with affection.

"Prosnut'sya, Fredka." He kept showering the blond with affection, peppering his neck and face with kisses before finally giving up and just nuzzling into his neck. After a few moments, Alfred's breathing became that of a conscious person and Ivan smiled.

"What time is it?" He didn't seem to mind their position at the moment, more focused on non-concrete things.

"About five o'clock. We slept for quite a while; I guess that's what you get for staying up so late." He kissed Alfred's forehead, not moving from his spot.

"Oh hon…" Alfred groaned with grogginess, obviously still not fully awake, but oblivious and unself-conscious. He curled himself around Ivan, one leg wrapping around the Russian's. "Why didn't you wake me up earlier?" His eyes were still closed as he kissed Ivan's neck.

"I just didn't feel the need to. Besides, you took forever to wake up." Ivan smiled at the love he was receiving. "Did you sleep well, at least?" He felt a nod on his neck. "That's good." He pulled Alfred closer so him, cuddling.

"Mm." Alfred was content in his warm, sleepy world he currently lived in. A phrase came into his mind and he let it fall from his lips without needing to think about it. "Ya lyublyu tebya."

The language was familiar to Ivan, and it hit home instantly. A warm blush crossed Ivan's features, accompanied by a smile. The returned phrase came naturally in the situation, in his native language. "Ya tozhe tebya lyublyu."

The brief yet important exchange was enough to make both of them blush a pretty pink. They cuddled on their bed, both of them smiling, eyes closed. Ivan's phone on the table began to vibrate, causing both to jump. Ivan sat up, giving a now open eyed Alfred an apologetic look. He got up from atop Alfred, crossing to the table and picking up his phone.

"Hello?"

Alfred watched as Ivan spoke, only then realizing how Ivan had woken him up. The tactic made him blush deeper and hide his face in the sheets. He continued to look at Ivan, studying the way his lips moved. He bit his bottom lip as he looked up at the ceiling. He closed his eyes, and after a few minutes, he heard Ivan hang up.

"It was Francis. Just checking in. Apparently, Mohrle is being a great cat. He sleeps next to Francis's pillow every night." This made Alfred chuckle slightly.

"That's adorable." Alfred rolled to one side, then the other, then back again in an attempt to stretch his limbs. "Ah. Alright. Come back to bed." Alfred got under the covers, then reached out to tug on Ivan's sleeve.

"But we just woke up…" Ivan blinked but allowed himself to be pulled back into the bed.

"Meh. Who cares. We could cuddle." Alfred actually had another idea, but he decided not to voice it at the moment. He pulled the covers over Ivan and snuggled into the bigger man's side. "You're so warm." He smiled and kissed Ivan's neck, giggling softly. He would get what he wanted; just not now. Maybe after a bit of cuddling, he would sneak some suggestive comment in there somewhere, or just straight out go for it. But he wanted Ivan, and he knew he could get him.


	19. Calgary

**A/N: **I love you guys so much. Not even kidding. You're all so wonderful. :"3 This chapter is… well, this chapter. A side note: reviews help me to keep writing stuff you guys like. It only takes a minute to tell me what I need to fix and what's super awesome, so please do! (I sound like an attention whore. Huzzah!) I want to thank you guys for all the glorious views! I'm so thankful you've stayed with me this far, and have stuck with me despite so many things. (Supernatural…..) I love you all! *Blows a kiss*

This chapter was something of a request from a reader who wanted to see more pairings. So, my dear, here is some FrUk that will–hopefully—sate your need. It's SO SHORT. Barely any fluff. I apologize. I have ECO's coming up. (Hey, I'm a high school student. -_- Surprise.)

The cat stalked in haughtily as it usually did, hopping up on the bed and staring at its occupants. Francis barely even noticed the small movement at the foot of the bed, but it sure as hell startled Arthur. He pulled back from the rather passionate kiss that he and Francis had found themselves in a moment ago to instead stare at the cat, heart racing slightly. Once he'd realized it was just the cat he relaxed. "Bloody cat." He huffed slightly, turning away from Francis to cross his arms and press his bare back against the headboard.

"What's wrong, mon petite chérie?" Francis sat up slightly to look over at the man beside him who was now grumbling something about cats. Arthur doesn't say anything, leading Francis to one of the best lines of all time. "What? Cat got your tongue?"

"Hell no! You ought to know that, seeing as _you_ had my tongue when the bloody thing got up here." He looked away, avoiding the cat's laser eyes which were obviously caused by the light from the alarm clock next to the bed.

The statement earned a chuckle and a thoughtful sound from Francis. "How about this? I'll go put her in her little kennel and we'll see how things go from there, yeah?"

He stood and grabbed the cat under her arms, taking her to the little kennel in the living room and gently pushing her inside. He locked the door, walking back to the bedroom. "There. Better?" He smiled a bit at the man in his bed. The blonde nodded and snuggled back down into the sheets.

"But now I'm tired. Let's sleep, alright?" Arthur laid back against his pillow, laying on his side. He closed his eyes, letting Francis slide into bed beside him. The Frenchman kissed up and down his neck, smiling and chuckling.

"Oui, I suppose." He sat back and stretched once, then decided to sleep. However, before he could actually sleep, he couldn't help but wonder aloud, "I wonder when they'll get back. They'd better be fucking every night, so help me god, this was a total waste of time." He laughed and closed his eyes, drifting off to sleep.

**Translations:**

Mon petite chérie—My darling

Oui—Yes

**Note:**

Yes. I realize this was a short chapter. Gimmie some time to study for my EOC and I'll get chapter 20 up as soon as possible. Thanks guys!


	20. Milkshakes

**A/N:** Hi guys, I've been wrapped up in studying. And crying over Dean's multiple deaths. And Castiel becoming human. No, really, my feels are so broken I died. -_- AND I've been busy listening to my best friend play this insane concerto that's 26 minutes long from memory. God, I swear, he's amazing. ;-; Anywho, thank you all for the kind reviews! You're all so patient…

"Okay, we really should get going." Alfred stretched and looked over to find Ivan was still asleep. He laughed softly, amused that he had woken up before the Russian. He rolled over onto his side, his upper hand reaching over to shake his boyfriend's arm.

"Vanya, wake up." His voice was soft and kind, nudges gentle.

"What time is it?" It seemed to be the question to ask right after waking up. Ivan moved about a bit, stretching and yawning as he opened his eyes to smile at Alfred.

"It's nine. We slept sixteen hours straight." Alfred smoothed Ivan's delicious bed hair, the mere thought of that in a different situation made Alfred smile and blush to himself. Alfred stood and looked around, hoping to move his mind to something else.

"Mmph. Fine." Ivan slowly rolled off the bed and landed on his feet, rubbing his eyes as his balance adjusted. "What do you want to do?"

"How about the zoo? We could go see the penguins." Alfred grinned at Ivan, straightening the clothes he'd been sleeping in.

"Ah, sure. That sounds like fun. Once we've dressed, we'll leave." Ivan walked shakily to his bag, limbs unaccustomed to the 9.8 Newtons of force that kept him on the ground. He grabbed some clothing from the duffel and quickly got dressed. "Alright, ready."

"Awesome! Let's go, then." They left their bags in the room this time, realizing that it was pointless to drag their things around if they were going to return to the same room that same night.

They headed out to the car; Ivan put the keys in the ignition, turning them until the vehicle shuddered to life and the radio promptly began to spit profanities at them via music. The local station didn't care much for censored versions. Alfred didn't really care, and Ivan shared that opinion with him. They let the windows down, the music that played within their car joining in harmony with a few other open-windowed cars with the same station on.

They headed down into a different part of Seattle, the houses and apartments far more prominent than the small business buildings. However, there were a few billboards, one of which read "Supernatural. 9/8 C." The glorious faces of Cas, Dean, and Sam filled the board.

"Omigod, Destiel ALL THE WAY!" Both Ivan and Alfred had shouted that at the same time, their words matching up. They both appeared excited as they delved into a conversation about their all-time favorite ship. Soon, though they arrived at the zoo and they exited their car after parking.

"Alright, penguins first!" Alfred leapt into the air, smiling giddily. He wasn't sure why he wanted to see the penguins so bad, but he really did.

"What about the turtles? Those things are so neat." Ivan trailed along behind Alfred, unaware his hair was still blissfully beddish. He eventually grabbed Alfred's hand for two reasons. The first being Alfred's pace that he found hard to keep up with. The second, he just really loved holding Alfred's hand.

"Oh, sure! We'll see those too!" Ivan and Alfred got to the front gate and paid the fees to get in, walking through the first part of the zoo with the elephants and giraffes. "This is so neat!" Alfred gave Ivan's hand a squeeze as he looked at a zoo map. "Alright, so left here!" Alfred was practically dragging Ivan along down the pathway. After a moment they took a left.

"Penguins?" Alfred looked around as he stopped walking. They should have been where they were standing, according to the map. A childlike pout appeared on Alfred's face and Ivan looked around. "I see them." He pointed to the right a little, the small enclosure full of the tuxedo wearing creatures. "Penguins!" Alfred's yelp startled the snow leopard on their left, making it retreat back to his cave.

Alfred ran towards the penguins, Ivan's hand abandoned as he moved towards them at a lethargic, yet happy pace. "They're fucking adorable!" Alfred clasped his hands together in front of his mouth, body wiggling about in excitement. "Look Ivan! Augh! _Look!"_ Alfred released his arms and promptly began flailing them about. "So adorable!"

Ivan laughed at the strong excitement of the blond, putting his hands in his pocket as he looked over at the penguins. Some waddled towards them while the others meandered this way and that way, one sliding down the hill on its belly.

"They're pretty adorable." Ivan looked over at Alfred. "But not nearly as adorable as you." Ivan grinned at the blond, eyes sincere, causing Alfred to blush and cease his flailing.

"Oh, thank you." A small smile crept onto Alfred's face and he took Ivan's hand, taking one last look at the cute flightless birds before turning away. "Let's go sea the turtles. Haha, get it? Sea? Turtle? Sea turtle? Oh god, I'm a genius." Ivan rolled his eyes and smiled.

"Oh god, that was a horrible pun. But nice one." Ivan gave the blond's hand a brief squeeze as they went on their way towards the turtle exhibit. Once they got there, they walked up close to the glass to stare in at the small and large creatures, all with beautiful shells on their backs.

"The babies are so cute. It must be a pain, quite frankly, having kids I mean." Alfred stared into the gorgeous deep blue the green animals lived in, almost in a trance.

"Well, we have Koshka. She's like a child. I mean, she will complain with that loud mouth of hers until you give her what she wants, and she sleeps in the middle of the day, and is just overall child-like." Ivan shrugged, his eyes also caught in the deep blue. He made a noise of contentment.

"Yeah, I guess. I wonder how she's doing over at Francis's place, anyways."

"_Francis, I swear, you say anything about them…. Eugh. Don't. You. Dare." Arthur made a disgusted face. "They'd better get back soon, though. This damn cat tried to eat my bacon and drink my tea." He huffed, glaring over at a laughing Francis. "Damn you."_

Ivan shrugged. "Probably fine, dear. I bet things are great for her there. Lots of toys to play with." He gave Alfred a mischievous look.

"Toys? We don't have any toys for her…" Alfred trailed off in confusion.

"I found out that cat _loves_ shoes. Francis has a ton of them. Therefore, I assume she's ripping them to shreds at the moment." Ivan chuckled, listening to Alfred's guffaw escape his mouth.

"Shoes, huh? Interesting." Alfred snuggled into Ivan's side, eyes focusing on a super small baby turtle, following its path across the rocks, then past some coral before laying on a big turtle's back.

**-ooo-**

Everything was packed up. The hotel room was somewhat put back together, though there were too many alcohol bottles to fit in the garbage cans, so there were stacks of bottles next to the fridge and on the night stand. Alfred grabbed his bag and slung it over his shoulder, grabbing an end of Ivan's scarf and giving gentle little tugs. "_Ivaaaaaaaannn._ Can we go now? _Pleaaaase?_"

Ivan rolled his eyes in mock agitation. "Oh, I suppose." He dropped the façade and gently kissed Alfred's forehead. "I love you."

The words never failed to sink deep into Alfred's mind and heart and take him by surprise, almost like a miniature heart attack of the good sorts, especially since he loved hearing it. "I love you too." He wrapped his arms around Ivan and gave him a loving hug, his face buried in the crook of the Russian's neck. "Lots and lots and lots and lots."

Ivan's smile grew more, causing him to giggle slightly. "I was hoping for that answer." Ivan grabbed his bag once Alfred had peeled off of him. "Alrightie, we're out of here, then." Ivan grabbed the remaining shopping bags from next to the door, scanning the room once more for anything left behind that wasn't left-overs from the booze.

They left the room, toting their backpacks and paper bags with them down to the front-dented car. Ivan opened the trunk and moved some stuff around before putting his stuff in and taking Alfred's, arranging everything just so. Once they got the trunk to close, they took their respective seats and Ivan started the car, getting out of the parking lot ad back onto the busy road. It was only nine, but people were already everywhere you looked.

Finally, Ivan got them on the freeway and headed home. Alfred could feel his eyes drooping closed. The soft lulling noise of the tires rolling on cement beckoning him into a sleep. He closed his eyes, deciding to give up the struggle to stay awake, letting himself fade into the land of dreams.

**-ooo-**

Ivan pressed the doorbell hesitantly. He hoped Francis wouldn't be too horribly mad about the whole ordeal. When Francis opened the door, he was wrapped in only a sheet, his hair askew. "Oh, bonjour, mon ami. Did you have a nice trip? Hopefully she treated you well." Francis nodded past the men outside the house.

"Ah, actually, someone kinda… Messed her up." Alfred stood behind Ivan, hiding from the yelling he hoped wouldn't be coming.

"Messed her… up? What do you mean?" Francis looked past them and saw the minor dent in the front of the car. His face tinted slightly red as he stormed past them, the glint of the sun off the warped metal made it look worse than it actually was. The sheet fell away from his hips, causing Alfred and Ivan to look away from the scene gingerly.

"Someone backed into her while we were inside a restaurant. I'm really sorry." Ivan averted his eyes downward, staring at the black of his shoes.

Francis ran his fingers over the dent, realizing it was very tiny. He sighed in relief and turned towards the boys. "It's smaller than I thought it was. It'll be a cinch to have fixed. However, you two are going to work off the expenses. You hear me?" He was still completely naked in his driveway.

"Yes, sir. But hey, Francis?" Alfred got his nerve up to look at Francis's face.

"Hmm?"

"You're naked." Alfred smiled slightly, looking away.

Francis looked down and rolled his eyes. "Dammit, not again." He grabbed the sheet and wrapped it around himself once more. The cat suddenly ran out of the house and climbed her way quickly up Alfred's pant leg, settling down in his arms on her back. Alfred laughed softly and Francis left to get the small kennel they'd given him to keep her in. When he came back, Francis was dressed and got in the car. "Come on, I'll give you boys a ride home." He smiled.

Both of them got in the back of the car and rode in silence on the way home. Francis began to hum some tune towards the end of the ride, and they said their goodbyes as they got out of the car, carrying Koshka in her kennel into the apartments. They got back into their house and took a deep breath, the comfort of their own little slice of the world instantly taking root in them. Bot Ivan and Alfred felt a sleepiness loom over them, and they let Koshka out of her kennel, putting it away and curling up on their oh-so-fluffy bed.

"Ahh, this is so nice." Alfred sprawled out as soon as he hit the sheets, watching as Ivan flopped down beside him. The blond curled up into Ivan's side to counter the cold blankets until they began to warm his body. "Mm."

Ivan smiled and nodded, not wanting to say anymore words. He simply made a content noise in the back of his throat and held Alfred tighter.

**Translations:**

Bonjour—Good Morning

Mon ami—My friend

**Note: **

Gerity to come soon….


	21. The Silence

**A/N:** I'm so sorry.

The morning started as any other morning. Ivan woke before Alfred did and make the coffee, got dressed, and brushed his teeth. Once Alfred was up, Ivan read the newspaper at the table while Alfred made breakfast. Totally normal. And yet, it felt odd to be back in their apartment. Sure, it was bigger than the hotel room, but they both missed the freedom of vacation. They never voiced that thought, but they both thought it like hell.

They gathered their wallets and phones and headed out the door wordlessly, locking the door behind them and walking to work. Ivan walked with his hands in the pockets of his jeans, and Alfred with his hands crammed in the pockets of his jacket. As his fingers moved about he felt a crumpled piece of paper. He knew it was the paper with Ivan's phone number on it. It simply stayed in his pocket all the time, almost as though it were a sense of security to him.

They made it to work, neither mentioning the silence between them. They waved their hellos to Francis and put on their aprons. Alfred was on register today, Ivan was on crafting duty. The customers were lacking today, however, and Alfred kept his mouth closed, never speaking. Ivan was the same, his lips occasionally parting to let his tongue peak out in concentration when he worked on an arrangement.

Francis seemed not to notice, however, and went on with his day as usual. He spoke animatedly to all the customers and made sure they bought something.

When lunch rolled around Alfred went out and Ivan stayed at the store, not feeling particularly hungry. Francis sent him looks of confusion, but never confronted him. Ivan just kept producing gorgeous vases full of flowers, the colors different from his normal schemes.

Alfred returned and went back behind the register for the rest of the day. They worked hard, more than normal. Francis appreciated it, of course, but he knew something was up. He made no attempt to ask as he simply assumed it had just been a bad fuck or something of the sort.

Ivan and Alfred left the store an hour later than normal to work part of the car off. As they walked home, they kept their eyes on the ground, lips sealed as they had been all day. Ivan unlocked the front door when they got home and Alfred made them dinner.

Ivan instead went to his room and tossed his clothes on the floor, slipping between their sheets in his boxers. He drifted off to sleep, listening to the soft scraping of Alfred's fork against his plate. Alfred came to bed later, not bothering to take his clothes off. He simply sank into the bed and drifted off.

-**ooo**-

"Something's up between you two. What's going on?" Francis earned a shrug from Ivan as the Russian man turned his back on his boss, walking to the back room to gather more flowers to make one more arrangement before closing time.

Frustrated, he decided to ask Alfred for answers. "Alfred, what's going on between you and the big guy?" Alfred looked up at him and shrugged. Francis was feeling rather concerned. "You know, it's been two days like this now. He never leaves for lunch any more. What's going on?" Alfred shrugged again and lifted his eyes to the door as a customer walked in.

Francis turned around gingerly and walked to the door, greeting the customer as usual. Alfred shot Ivan a look as the taller man fixed the flowers in the vase. He was bent over the table, head drooping down tiredly. Though he couldn't see it, Ivan's hands were shaking, his eyes staring down at the flowers. Try as he might, he just couldn't get the flowers where he wanted them. His face was pale and a bit more sunken than normal. Alfred wasn't sure what was going on, but he couldn't seem to find his voice.

Alfred turned his attention back to Francis and the giggly customer who pointed to a list in her hand. A lists of seeds, he assumed. He rested his head on his hand, staring boredly out the window. He jumped as a loud thump came from the corner of the shop. He looked over and straightened up when he saw Ivan laying on the floor, unconscious.

-**ooo**-

"Right. How much does he sleep?" The doctor stood with his clipboard at the foot of Ivan's bed.

"Quite a bit."

"How much does he drink?"

"Not often."

"Has he shown any weird behavior lately?" Alfred shrugged.

"How often does he eat?" After the doctor asked the question there was a beat of silence, and then, "To be honest, I'm not sure. He just… Goes straight to bed as soon as I walk him home, and… I don't know anymore." Alfred sat in the chair next to the bed, his hand holding Ivan's, thumb tracing small circles.

"So you don't live together, then." The doctor looked up from his notes, pen poised to write more.

"N-no, we do. But…lately, he and I haven't been speaking much. I dunno. I just didn't feel like talking all of a sudden?" He took his hand back into his lap and stared down at it. "I don't know what happened."

The doctor clicked his pen shut and crossed his arms. "I see. I do believe I understand what's going on." He turned and left before Alfred could get a word in edgewise. He looked over at Ivan. There was an IV in his arm and he looked horribly pale. There was a gash on his forehead where his head hit the table when he fell. The bloody area was such bright contrast against his skin, and it was almost shocking to Alfred's eyes.

"Please be alright. Please." Alfred laid his head down on the bed next to Ivan's cold hand, his fingers still intertwined with Ivan's on the cotton hospital sheets.

"Please."

**Note: **On a happier note, Chapter 16 is all smutted up.


	22. Requiem for Blue Jeans

**A/N: **Oh my god. This story is going different places, and god damn. I think there might be a trigger warning added for major character death. God, I'm sorry guys. You wanna kill me? That's cool. I'm cool with that.

Their apartment was dark when Alfred got there, the lights all off, curtains drawn. He had only returned to grab some clothes and his earphones and that would be it. Then he'd go back to the hospital to make sure Ivan was alright. He walked into the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge, unscrewing the cap and taking a great big gulp. He capped the bottle and stuck is under his arm as he trudged through the house, making his way to the bedroom.

He opened the door and stumbled over to the closet, grabbing some clothing from the hangers. He walked across the room and grabbed a pair of pants, tossing them on the bed with the shirts and water bottle, and then closed the drawer. He went to another drawer, pulling out a pair of boxers and tossing them on the bed.

As he turned back to close the drawer, though, a white something caught his eyes in the corner of the drawer. He rummaged around in the fabric until he reached it, pulling it out to find it was an envelope. He looked at the neat, hand-printed lettering spelling out his boyfriend's name. Upon looking at the return address, he found it was from Ivan's younger sister.

Furrowing his brow in thought, Alfred opened the ripped envelope, pulling out a letter than was written in a messy scrawl, nothing like what had been on the envelope. He tilted his head and read the first paragraph.

_Dear Ivan,_

_I hate to be the barer of such horrible news after such a long time of not seeing each other, but I am afraid that is how it is going to have to be. In any case, I hope you have been well and have settled down with a nice young lady. That's what she would have wanted._

Alfred reread the last two sentences, slightly angry, slightly confused. She who? And why a lady? They're temperamental, and when it's their time of the month, they're total bitches, and they mope around and break things and just eat so damn much chocolate it seemed ridiculous. Alfred shook off his feelings and read further.

_I am sorry to say that Katyusha has passed. We think it was from a drug overdose or sorts, but we are not sure. We are waiting to hear from the doctors. In the meantime, take care of yourself. _

_Love, Natalia._

The heartbeat in Alfred's ears was shocking, and almost too loud. Things slowly clicked into place. He sat on the bed and reread the letter over a few times, making sure he'd read that right. He stood and packed his things into a duffel bag at lightning speed and ran out the door, running to the hospital with the letter in his hand still. He knew the cause of Ivan's sickness! He could help!

He willed himself to move faster, feet pounding against the pavement as he rounded the corner to the entrance of the hospital. He sprinted past the dumbstruck nurses who simply stepped back and watched the young male run though the hospital. If he was whacking people with his duffel bag, he wasn't noticing. He skidded to a stop at the receptionist's desk. "Please, I need to speak to the doctor!"

The nurse looked up at him with an indifferent expression, and then looked down at a schedule, finger moving down the page just as slowly, if not slower, than her previous motion. Her index finger finally came to a rest over a blank area. "End of the hall, on your right."

Alfred nodded in thanks then walked quickly down the hall, walking in without knocking. The doctor looked up, not surprised in the least. Alfred looked about a moment, not sure what to do with himself. He remembered the letter and dug it from his pocket, setting it on the table.

The doctor looked up at him and then back down to the letter, reading over it. "So you're thinking he began to suffer from depression after his sister died, which is why he began to refuse food?" Alfred wasn't sure if that was it, but he nodded anyways.

There was a few minutes of pure silence, save the noise coming from other rooms. "I see. Well, I suppose that makes sense. We have a bit more of an idea as of what to do now." The doctor met Alfred's eyes with a tiny smile. "Thank you. He's awake. At least, he was the last time I was in there. Watching some show with Jensen Ackles in it." The doctor winked and Alfred found himself quickly turning around and walking hurriedly out of the office, not needing to hear how sexy this man was. He already knew.

He went to Ivan's room and set down the bag on a chair, looking over at Ivan with a tiny smile, seeing the violet eyes open and staring at the screen with Misha Collins and Jared Padalecki on it. "Hey." He was slightly winded from all the running, but he didn't care.

"Hi." Ivan still looked feeble, which was a weird look for his body. His body was obviously still suffering from starvation, and his heartbeat was fickle.

"I… I'm glad you're awake. You had me worried, you know." Alfred bit his bottom lip as tears of relief welled up in his eyes. "You just passed out and I didn't know what happened. Francis called an ambulance because you didn't wake up after forty five seconds, and fuck it was so scary Ivan…"

"But I'm okay. That's the important thing, you know. They say they want to keep me here for a week." Ivan began to sit up. "I don't see wh-" He gasped and fell back against the pillow. "Nevermind." He closed his eyes and winced.

"But I'll be okay, I promise."

**Notes: **This story is drawing to a close! Again, I do believe there will be a trigger for **Major Character Death.** I'll write an alternate ending for those of you who don't want to feel the feels like Twist and Shout (Destiel fic). Holy fuck. I'm sorry.


	23. Oblivious

**A/N:** I warned you all. Please forgive me. Blood, gore, death.

Ivan pulled his shirt over his head, happy to be back in normal street clothes. The IV's had left little red spots on his skin, but he didn't care. He could go home. Alfred had promised him that things were going to be alright, and Ivan was happy to know Alfred was there for him. He came out of the bathroom with the gown over his forearm. As he met Alfred, he tossed his hospital garment into the dirty laundry bin, smiling and kissing Alfred's forehead.

"See? Everything is good now." He even took a granola bar from his bag and started to eat it for good measure. He took Alfred's hand with his free one as they walked out of the front doors, giving it a confident squeeze.

"I'm glad you're alright. I bet Mohrle has been worried sick about you. I went home to feed her and she was just laying there on your side of the bed." Alfred's words made Ivan smile. "Really? That's adorable!" They both laughed and smiled, the concrete under them could be seen in detail with how slow they were walking.

"Well, I am excited to go home and see Mohrle, you know. She is such a cutie." Ivan smiled genuinely, memories of a small grey cat hopping around the living room chasing a laser flittering through his head.

"Yeah, she's honestly really great. I'm glad we took her in!" Alfred's voice was filled with love for the small furry creature that angered him when she woke him up early by licking his ear.

There was a moment of comfortable, knowing silence between them that was only broken by the sound of a crash, followed by an alarm. Ivan and Alfred looked over, watching a man drop a crowbar onto the ground, making a clattering noise as it hit the broken glass of a car window. Ivan pulled his phone out and began to dial 911.

Alfred acted immediately, dropping his duffel bag and starting to run to the car. "Hey! What the fuck do you think you're doing?" The man turned as soon as he saw Alfred and picked up the crowbar again, wielding it in preparation to stop Alfred from stopping him.

Alfred didn't care what the man was holding; he was going to save this car and be a hero. He lunged towards the man, grabbing ahold of the metal bar and tugging it to the side. The man was teetered to one side, eyes wide before he was able to catch his balance.

He ripped the bar from Alfred's hands, swinging at Alfred's head. The blond ducked just barely in time, but was too slow to move again before the cold, unforgiving metal slammed into his right temple, sending stars to obstruct his vision. He dizzily stepped back, only to be slammed right in the side of his ribs. He cried out softly.

The man who was attacking Alfred looked over his shoulder, seeing a car approaching, a stupid teenage girl at the wheel on her phone. He grinned in a rather Machiavellian manner before putting the edge of the crowbar right in the center of Alfred's chest and pushing hard, sending Alfred tumbling straight into the center of the road, stuck on his back.

Ivan had finished talking to the operator and watched in sheer horror as the car came closer and closer to a half conscious Alfred in the center of the road, moaning in pain. The girl was obviously speeding, and wasn't watching where she was going. The car ran right over Alfred.

Ivan shrieked and ran forward to the bleeding and barely breathing Alfred. The attacker took his opportunity to run as the girl stopped and got out, staring at them. Ivan tugged his shirt off and pressed it to the major wound on his chest, where a few ribs were sticking awkwardly at the inside of his skin, blood pooling around him. "No no no no! Alfred, please…" Ivan brushed some hair from Alfred's face, heart rushing, heartbeat in his ears.

"Ivan…" Alfred took labored, shallow breaths. "It's going to be okay." Alfred tried to grin, but the lights went out in his eyes before he could pull the right muscles to pull those pink lips into a final smile. Ivan sat back on his knees, staring up at the sky as his eyes produced tear after tear, his voice ripping into the air in a pained cry.

It was over. Everything in his life was over. There was the man he loved the most laying dead before him. This was his fault. This was all his fault. Had he not been sick, they wouldn't be out that day. If only he'd been the one to rush the man instead of Alfred.

He could have saved a life.

The paramedics pulled up with their sirens wailing, the paramedic that reached Alfred first checked his vitals and shook his head, saying it was too late and that there was nothing they could do. They brought out the body bag, and just like that, Ivan couldn't do anything. His body was rigid and he simply sat there in the middle of the road on his knees, face towards the sky, face soaked with tears.

He wasn't sure what to do, so he did the first thing he could think of. He pulled out his phone and hit the speed dial for Francis. After three rings, Francis picked up with a soft 'Bonjour?' Ivan found his composure for a moment. "Alfred… He…" He stopped, unable to finish without the sobbing coming back.

"He what?" Ivan began sobbing again.

"He's dead."


	24. Things We Lost in the Fire

The air that rushed into Ivan's lungs was crisp and cold and sterile in a way. The sudden intake of air had made his head spin, and he hadn't even opened his eyes. He decidedly kept them closed. Though he could feel another hand on his he ignored everything around him and tried to let his mind sink back into sleep. The soft beeping above him was very fast, and he could only assume that was his heartbeat.

He was suddenly barraged by confusion. It was like he had run into a wall of sorts, and he was completely dumbstruck. He couldn't quite form a coherent thought, but he knew one thing: Something was wrong. He couldn't quite recall what had happened.

He supposed that if he were really in a hospital, they'd probably drugged him. Hard. If he couldn't remember anything as of recent then they had definitely done something.

Ivan willed his brain to find a way around the wall. Under? No. Around? No. Under? What the hell, why not? He went back in his mind to where he could remember. The first thing was remembering Seattle. The skyline was something he could never forget, and he knew he'd seen it recently. Had he been with someone then? No, he couldn't have been.

Surely the bottles of vodka he remembered scattered about had been his. Surely he'd gone by himself and gotten drunk. And he did something fantastic involving penguins. What was it? It was penguins and turtles. He mentally shook himself, trying to focus on something else.

He'd been shopping. He remembered something about the mall. Was there a mall? What if it was just a Walmart? God, he couldn't remember anything. There was just a giant barricade of who-knows-what there, and he just can't get past it. He'd borrowed Francis's car, hadn't he? Was that Francis's? Oh god, he hadn't hotwired a car, had he?

No, it had been the Frenchman's. It had gotten a dent in it from someone rear-ending… no, they were backing out of a parking spot and hit it. That was it. But there had been someone with him. He distinctly remembered that. Who the hell had it been?

Did he have mohrle with him? No. Mohrle can't speak, let alone say something along the lines of "shitballs." No, it'd been a person. A blond, he supposed. Had they been blond? No, brunette, right?

He struggled for a moment more, then decided that, yes, it was indeed a blond. That's all he could draw up at the moment, and he felt satisfied slightly. Yet there was this feeling gnawing at his insides that something gut-wrenching that had happened.

What the hell had it—No. It was Alfred. Alfred had been with him in Seattle. Alfred had been there with him when he was drinking all that vodka. Alfred was there when the car got damaged, and he'd been the one to swear about the car.

It was Alfred. Something had happened. Something terrible.

But what?

The hand on Ivan's started moving their thumb in small circles, and it was giving him goose bumps. Something felt wrong with his body. He was just so tired. His body didn't want to respond to him properly, and his throat was horribly dry. He couldn't ignore the beeping now, despite the fact it was now slower.

_I need one more shot at this. Just one._ He urged the blockade to be pushed aside, his mind scratching feebly at the thing. He focused on Alfred, focused on the wall, and suddenly the wall gave way, and all of his memories came rushing back in like a cat from the snow.

Alfred had died. He was dead. It was his fault he was dead. Dear god, he'd lost his love because he'd done nothing. Jack with a steaming side of squat. Alfred would still be alive if he'd _done something. _Anything. But no. Alfred was dead, and he was never coming back.

The beeping became quick and his eyes flew open, full of tears. A broken sob reached his lips and tumbled from them like a landslide. He shut his eyes tight then, not wanting to see the world. It wasn't worth it; not without him.

The hand on his tightened and a sharp gasp was heard.

"Ivan?"

That voice. The voice he was so used to hearing, and it was right there. It was him. No, it couldn't be; he was dead. The mere thought ripped at his heart and almost made him want to curl up and die.

"Ivan, please, look at me!" The voice was panicked, but it was the same voice. He opened his eyes out of sheer compliance, and lo and behold, there sat a very alive, very well, and very scared looking Alfred.

Everything stopped. Alfred was _alive._ He was here holding his hand and trying to calm him down, and he was crying too. Ivan stared into those fantastic eyes, this pang of guilt ebbing away slowly. He was here. Untouched. Totally healthy.

"You're…alive. You're…alive!" His throat refused to work and he could only whisper gruffly towards the man he loved so dearly. "I'm…so sorry. So sorry…." He could only speak in short fragments, words running together when he could. The tears came back then, spilling over and rolling down his cheeks as though they were set on going somewhere they were late to.

"Of _course_ I'm alive! Why wouldn't I be?" Alfred looked so relieved it hurt. "I'm so glad you're okay." Alfred stooped his head down to give Ivan's pale hand a kiss.

"What do you…mean? What…happened?"

"You…" Alfred started crying harder, sniffling like a small child. "You stopped eating because of what happened, and you just passed out, and the doctors said your body was refusing the nutrients they put in the IV, and they didn't know what was going on, and…" His body was suddenly racked with sobs when it hurt too much to keep going, chest heaving as he filled the room with his crying.

Ivan raised a shaky hand to Alfred's hair, letting his fingers run through it gently. "It's going to be okay." That phrase. It hurt his heart like a mother. He knew Alfred was right there, but he couldn't forget the sight of Alfred dying, his eyes losing the light as though his soul had left, and his body going completely still.

"I am so sorry." Ivan let his hand fall back onto the bed, sighing. "I'm so glad it's okay."

Alfred looked up and smiled the smallest smile he could muster through tears. "Me too. It's okay." He paused. "We're going to be okay.

**Note:** There was an Explanation chapter, but I realized it gave a lot away, so it got deleted. Sorry for the notification.


	25. Incompatible

**A/N:** This A/N is sort of kind of long. You may scroll.

RoyalPear had to help me remember what the cat's name was. That's how long it's been.

Well, fuck. Guys, I worked all summer and completely forgot about writing. I left you all hanging. You have permission to murder me. School started Wednesday and I'm actually failing a class right now. SO. This is fun. I really encourage you to listen to the title song—which is by Baths—while reading this chapter. I feel like maybe it will kind of show you the mood, maybe? Pay attention to the lyrics and maybe things will make sense.

While lying in bed approximately 20 minutes ago, I realized this fic is TERRIBLY written. Honest to god, there's no plot what so ever. Seeing as this is the case, I'm going to go ahead and try to wrap this up. I am very grateful to everyone who has stuck with me on this and read this plot-less thing. It'll probably end soon (another 2-5 chapters), and hopefully with a good ending.

My intention was not to promote anorexia. I can tell you from firsthand experience that not eating is a horrible thing, and when you pass out at work, people know something's wrong. Please guys, take care of yourselves.

Alfred sat in the living room of the small apartment, fingers running over the fabric of the couch to the point of blistering, and still he continued to do it. His gaze remained locked on the window, eyes glassily staring into the rain that fell and nourished the earth. The house was silent. He hadn't expected to be pushed away when Ivan came back home, but now that it was a reality he wasn't sure what to do.

The tips of Alfred's index and middle fingers were numb, and he could no longer feel the pain of the blisters. He certainly wasn't complaining, though they would hurt later on.

He felt bad for Ivan. He'd lost his sister, the only person who'd been there for him in his childhood. He'd stopped eating and now only stayed in bed facing away from the door. Today, the window in the bedroom was open and Ivan's indifferent eyes drank in the weather only to think nothing of it. It dampened the window sill with tiny drops and pooled together to run off the edge of the sill and land in a small lake on the floor.

_What was the reason for getting up? _Ivan's eyes became glassy as he thought. _I'm only going to fall back down again._ He sighed. The quiet of the house was unusual, but welcomed in his mind.

Alfred grimaced. He wished Ivan would tell him what bothered him whenever he looked at Alfred. Why did he look away? Other than losing his older sister, what had happened to make Ivan avoid Alfred?

Alfred pulled his knees up to his chest, one arm wrapping around them while his other hang continued to run along the grains of the couch. He shivered. They hadn't bothered with the thermostat since they'd gotten home, and the rain outside made it cold and damp, even inside.

He sighed. There honestly wasn't much he could do at this point in time, other than bring Ivan his meals daily. The Russian had begun eating again, but remained silent and kept his gaze on the ground or the bed or the window. In short, he just never looked at Alfred.

The blond stood from the couch, looking back down at the spot where his fingers had made good acquaintance with the fabric. It was slightly lighter than the rest of the couch now. He made to grab a sweatshirt and a pair of running shoes from the bedroom, but decided against it. He instead went to the kitchen to grab a water bottle. He leaned against the counter and opened it, taking a few drinks before twisting the cap back on and setting it on the counter next to him.

He stared out the window as he had when sitting on the couch, eyes distant as he watched the sheets of rain pour down. There was a young girl waiting for the bus in the rain without an umbrella and he felt bad for her. Alfred looked down at his watch. Frowning, he decided he ought to do something with his day.

Alfred never gave much thought to it, but now he realized that we all waste our lives, and we do it so casually that it seems normal. Yet, we all know that we ought to be doing something with our talents and our life that's been breathed into us and that we inhale in every few seconds. He was guilty of wasting his life. He went through school, but was lazy. He never gave much thought or effort to things, and had he, he could have been studious and he could have gone places. But instead he just started working.

There was nothing wrong with that, of course. Working was making money and making money was a necessity. He'd settled down with his boyfriend. Things were good. Maybe not most presently, but they had been good, and he hoped that they would return to the way they had been before Ivan's family ordeal.

Alfred picked up the water bottle and grabbed his iPod from the counter. He threw on some shoes, shoving one bud into his ear and pressing play. He unlocked the door and opened it, catching the cord of the earphones on the handle. The moment of silence opened and he heard the sheets on the bed shifting, then footsteps that came from the bedroom.

He didn't move, ears alert as he listened to the footsteps that came up behind him. "Where are you going?" The deadpan voice was far closer to his ear than he'd expected, and he imagined Ivan standing close behind him. It wasn't loving or remotely curious.

"I figured I'd head to work. I've got nothing better to do." Silence. Alfred dropped his hand from the handle and sighed softly. He turned around to look at Ivan.

His lavender eyes were dark and held no emotion, unlike before when they'd been bright and cheery. The dark circles under his eyes made it apparent that sleep no longer came easily to him. His pale lips were set in a hard line, and Alfred wanted to reach out and just hold him and let him know that it was okay. He yearned for Ivan's touch and his love, and yet neither came. He looked at the ground.

"I guess I'll be back later." Alfred turned slowly and started to walk out the door, hoping that a warm hand would catch his wrist and stop and him spin him around and Ivan would beg him to stay there with him, but as he kept walking nothing happened. The door shut behind him and drowned all hope of his fantasy becoming true.

He trudged down the stairs slick with the footsteps from the other occupants of the apartment complex and walked out into the rain, feet sloshing about in the half inch of water that stood on the sidewalk, each droplet making ripples in what seemed like a lake.

Alfred turned his gaze to the tops of the buildings, appreciating how high up they were. _I wonder how it would feel to jump._ Alfred shoved the thought from his mind and tried to think of other things. The flowers at the shop would surely cheer him up, he hoped.

-**ooo -**

Ivan watched Alfred walked out the door. He walked slowly, but never once looked back. He didn't care. Why should he care? He shouldn't. Ivan walked back to the bedroom and laid back down, burying himself in the cream coloured sheets.

He felt horrible. He knew he was pushing Alfred away, but it was for his own good. Ivan was nothing but horrible for him. He was depressed, and only made Alfred worry. His mind put insults on loop and played them through constantly as he lay there.

In the back of his mind the nightmare loomed. He tried not to think about it, tried not to think about how many times he'd seen Alfred die. He diverted his thoughts from spilled blood and tried to focus on the crumpled piece of paper that always fell out of his pocket at the very end of the dream. He knew what it was, in fact he had given it to him.

Ivan was touched that Alfred carried Ivan's hastily scribbled phone number with him. The innocence of it almost made him want to cry. He knew he didn't carry it for reasons of forgetting it, because the number was programmed in his phone in the contacts. He kept thinking that, yes, perhaps Alfred missed him and wanted him still and that he _loved_ him. His heart swelled with the concept that maybe, after everything, Alfred still loved him as much as Ivan loved him. His brain scoffed at the thought and pointed out that it he was simply installing false hope within himself.

He couldn't bear to look at Alfred. The expression that seemed to be permanently affixed to his features carried so much sorrow and worry around him, and it was like taking a blow to the chest each time he looked up. He occasionally gave him a fleeting glance when he came in to grab something, because then his expression was soft.

Ivan thought back to when Alfred would sleep in his arms. His expression would be relaxed and his hair tousled adorably, mouth slack, sheets showing how his chest moved with his slow, shallow breathing. He missed it. He missed Alfred's warmth, and he missed the smile that was reserved only for him, and used when they sat in the kitchen drinking coffee and reading in the morning and when they baked treats together, and as he said his last words of the night before drifting off into sleep.

Ivan ran his hands angrily over his face, groaning softly. He was going to try to get better for Alfred. He had to. And he decided to start by getting out of bed and facing the day. He showered and dressed with an extra sweatshirt albeit slowly and ate a poptart on his way to work. He wouldn't let the rain wash away his determination. This time, he wouldn't let Alfred down, and he wouldn't let himself slip away from Alfred again.

**Notes:** Hey so yes this is a short chapter and I apologize and fuck guys, I'm so sorry. I just. I got caught up in other things and I had a rough summer. I've started school again and I'm hoping to get back on a normal writing schedule. I'm not sure how much I'll be putting out, but my profile will have all the schedules on it that I will not follow probably absolutely follow.

Thanks for your patience guys.


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